My Theory on the Bulge

[trackfan]

At first I thought the Bulge probably was some kind of electronic receiver. Militating against this, however, was the fact that * did such a lousy job in the debates. My thought, seconded by a sound professional was that the device was not functioning properly - at least in the first debate. Still, it seemed a bit unlikely * could be so bad with the benefit of cheating.

Tonight I came up with a new theory, and I want to run it by the group to see what you think: When talk first came up about the bulge, some freepers said, "Well, it's obviously a bullet proof vest of sorts". This line of defense was undermined by *s people themselves when they denied that * was wearing any sort of protective device. Now, in the meantime, I - who tend to be doubtful of complex, nefarious theories - found it very curious that the * people denied that there was any bulge whatsoever. Since I could see with my own eyes that there was a bulge, I knew they were full of shit, and hiding something; so, I figured he must have had a reciever. Still, my initial doubts based on his perfomance made me think there may be another explanation. Then, I realized that he may indeed have had a bullet proof vest, BUT they would not admit it because that would not be in keeping with his carefully crafted image as a super-human, god-like protector of us. If he looked like just a scared, piece-of-shit, asshole, like he is, it would ruin everything for them. So they stuck with the lie of "no bulge", even though now everyone thinks he had a receiver, because the truth, i.e. "he's a scaredy cat" is even worse for their world construct. What do you think?

[newsguyatl]

1. no, i think this is what freepers

want folks to think it is.

it's a receiver, there's no doubt in my mind.

[trackfan]

4. Well, I'll have to admit, it looks more like a receiver

than a bullet proof vest, but both the utter audacity of it, and his piss-poor performance, make me think it might be something else. Their well known inability to admit any sort of weakness could play in to my theory.

[The Velveteen Ocelot]

2. Very plausible.

Actually, I think that no matter what the bulge turns out to be, it's bad for El Arbusto Stupido. If it's a bulletproof vest, it makes him look like a pussy who can't go anywhere in public safely because the whole world hates his guts. If it's a radio transmitter he's a cheater who can't handle a debate without help. If it's a back brace or a Holter monitor or a drug dispensing device it means he's damaged goods, not the tough athlete they want us to think he is. And if he has a medical condition one might also infer he's gorked out on painkilling drugs. Whatever it is, they don't dare admit it's there. No bulge. Nothing to see here, folks....

[trackfan]

13. Re: your signature....what are Orchides?...must be something

important, since "their hearts and minds will follow"

[The Velveteen Ocelot]

14. Translation:

"Grab them by the balls; their hearts and minds will follow."

Orchids=the testicle flower!

[trackfan]

15. I suspicioned that might be it! Thanks.. n/t

[Ready4Change]

3. It's too easy to theorize the opposite.

I was thinking it was a vest, but then I thought "How could a vest account for Bushes terrible showing in the debates?" And then it occurred to me, he's probably gotten used to using the reciever to help him deliver stump speeches, expecially considering he hates to read. However, using a reciever to remind you of lines you've said countless times in the past is different than using a reciever to spout a brand new question you've likely never heard before.

So, while he's in the debate forum he's secure enough he doesn't need to wear a vest, but no amount of electronics can make up for his lack of ability answering questions about the job he's supposed to have been doing for the last 4 years.

[dactyl]

5. Kerry's Pat on the Back!

I had a lot of time to think about this on the plane today, and it occured to me that maybe Kerry's pat on bush's back was designed to either make bush know that Kerry knows about the receiver, OR (maybe a little far fetched) to turn it off or otherwise disable it.

[aint_no_life_nowhere]

6. THIS photo from today looks like Bush is wearing a vest

I can see the edge of a vest on his upper chest area. Notice how his shirt's material is loose above the first button and taut below it.



And here's the rear view. Notice there is no square box on his back and unless he had a different type of vest on the night of the debate, he wasn't wearing any vest and it was something else.

[kokomo]

9. Love the Republican lipless "kiss-kiss"! But then the chimp has no lips

:bounce:

[wurzel]

7. I think it was a tape machine that kept on repeating "It's hard work"!

[kokomo]

8. Would so love to be able to transmit a painful screech to his ear!

It would be priceless to see Shrub running around in agony, hands clasped over his ears while a brain numbing high-pitched squeal drips pain into his brain like a needle in a Texas death chamber.

[aint_no_life_nowhere]

10. Or jam the signal with "It's A Small World After All" over-and-over

forcing him to listen to that through the entire debate.

[K rock]

12. Maybe it was a brain Slug.

Not much of a brain so it had to settle for his spine. Why wear a receiver there, wouldn't it be easier to put it on his waist or in his pants. anyway, He did so poorly there is no way he was getting advice.

[newyawker99]

16. Hi K rock!!

Welcome to DU!! :toast:

[TrustingDog]

11. this is what I think... for the moment.

He Was wired for the first debate but the system didn't work as planned (sabotage or shitty luck?) - that's why he had one of the worst performances ever, and that's saying a Lot; he was dumbfounded, surprised, shocked and left all alone squirming in his puddle of juices.

For the second debate the equipment worked as planned.