It's not going in our yard, Russ. It's going in our living room

[NightWatcher]

[MiddleFingerMom]

1. When he started with his job, MiddleFingerMomDad was in sales...

.
.
.
...and traveled great distances over long periods of time in the
family station wagon on his sales route. He also always had
these fantastic gargantuan gardens (least favorite gardening
chore -- weeding... most favorite -- pickin' fresh peas... "One
for the bucket... two for me)."
.
Once, right before one of his sales trips, he ordered x number
of yards of manure to be delivered to the house for his garden,
having not a single clue how much a "yard" was going to be (or
the fact that, in this instance, they were cubic yards).
.
MiddleFingerMom told me it was the closest she ever came to
considering divorcing him. He got a cryptic, CHILLY call telling
him to turn around and come home THIS VERY INSTANT AND
I DON'T CARE IF YOU LOSE YOUR JOB OR NOT.
.
.
.
He came home to find that x number of yards of stinky ol'
cowshit had taken two dumptrucks to deliver and construct
the mountain under MiddleFingerMom's second-floor kitchen
window.
.
.
.
MiddleFingerMomDad was a jerk, but in some ways... I am
VERY much like him.
.
.
.

[krispos42]

2. length times width times height times... "fun factor".

:rofl: