Am I being too sensitive?

[annabanana]

I sometimes (if requested) make something we colloquially call a "Jr. Burrito" after our son, (who likes it) for Mr. Banana for breakfast. I scramble an egg and roll it up in burrito bread. I asked him if he wanted a little onion, salt, pepper & ketchup on it.. "that's nice" he answered. Then I asked him if he'd like me to put some cheese in it and he replied.

"It comes with cheese"

I blew up. IT "COMES" WITH IT?.. What is it an ITEM ON A MENU?.. IT DOESN'T "COME" ANYWHERE.. I BRING IT.

He didn't get my objection at all and responded with a typical, passive aggressive "now I don't want it"

I am fuming.

[taterguy]

1. Yes

[suninvited]

2. yes

maybe he chose his words badly, but they normally come with cheese. Why bother getting all worked up and mad over something so trivial?

[annabanana]

3. They don't "come " at all..

That's my beef

I don't always make them that way either.

[Chan790]

4. Possibly.

It really seems to depend on context and tone. It's an insensitivity on his part, but since I think he merely meant "it always includes cheese" (addendum-edit>>> )or in light of your response in #3 "I'd always prefer it with cheese"(<<<end-edit)...I'd probably have let it passed, saved it for another moment to discuss on terms of not always feeling appreciated.

It comes down to Does he mean to be a clod sometimes or is he just a clod sometimes. We're all guilty of it and nobody is ever appreciated as much as they should be.

[annabanana]

10. I guess I am feeling "underappreciated". . He's happily

contemplating retirement and the fact that an "at home mom" doesn't get one when the kids are part of the 'basement generation". .

ugh

[surrealAmerican]

5. Don't fume.

Tell him calmly why this bothers you. He likely didn't mean this they way it sounded to you, and if he did, you want it to be a mistake he won't make again.

[annabanana]

6. "tell him calmly"..sigh

I'm afraid that boat has sailed. I'm just going to have to wait it out.

[Orrex]

7. Yes

How old is he?

If he's under 10 (for instance), then you shouldn't let it bother you.

If he's older than 10, then let him make his own damn burrito.

[annabanana]

8. Mr. Banana?.. turned 60 last May. . . .I am just a Long Island housewife...

hyperbole deliberate

[Orrex]

9. Wait a minute! We're talking about your husband here? And not a young child?

You're not being too sensitive. He's being an asshole.

[annabanana]

11. THANK YOU!

[madmom]

12. Next time put the egg in the burrito and give it to him. If he says anything about the "missing"

ingredients say "you didn't ask for them".

[Mendocino]

13. If he going to treat you like a

server, you should be tipped. Otherwise pluck a hair out and put that in the burrito. Then if whines about it, say "That's what they come, if you don't want a hair , make it yourself." ;)

[MrScorpio]

14. Yeah, you were

I think you owe your kid an apology, if that was your kid. I'm not sure here. If it was your husband, the answer is no. He should have been making it.

[Phentex]

15. No. The proper answer by child or spouse would have been

yes, thanks!

I can see myself asking about the cheese, too, because one of my boys doesn't care much for cheese but would eat it if I put it on already. I do not think you are being too sensitive here.

[Swede]

16. Does it come with hashbrowns?

:hi:

[Kali]

17. when you spend a lot of your life doing for them they do tend to take you for granted

relax and find a nice thing to do for yourself, you do deserve it and you have to do that for yourself as much as you have to do it for them.

I'm chuckling at "burrito bread" and gagging at ketchup on eggs, though. I live too close to Mexico:rofl:

[petronius]

18. If he doesn't want it, can I have it? Sounds tasty (despite Kali's puritanical kvetching upthread!)

:P

I don't think you're being too sensitive; it seems like your household situation is changing and a serious conversation is in order. If he's going into retirement, then some major rearrangement of duties is in order, as well as acknowledgement of everyone's contributions...

As for the specific comment, how bad it was depends a bit on tone. I've said very similar things to my wife, jokingly, when we both knew she was doing something special. But if she wasn't in the mood for 'the waitress game' then I'd take it back and apologize. And if the tone was more that making him breakfast is your job and you should know how to do it by now, then you should be thoroughly pissed of...