Forgiveness....

[Dystopian]

Although you will never read my words...never know....

I just experienced forgiveness...
With just two clicks...it took far too long.

I am free..
And I wish you well...
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3D4VMZb8wLY


peace~

[Amerigo Vespucci]

1. Unforgiveness is...

...slavery, it's bondage, it is a slow, deliberate decaying of the heart and soul and yes, it does block the "flow" of any good things into our lives, things we want, things we deserve.

I've had an interesting life in that I have seen my own worst behavior acted out in others...it is like God / "The Universe" / whatever we each consider to be the glue that holds our brief human experience together...held up a mirror to my face and said "see what you look like when you act this way?"

And I've looked in that "mirror" and was sickened, and also gained an appreciation for the people in my life who put up with me while I was at my worst, and wondered what kind of relationship I'd have with them if I could somehow be at my best.

In 2009, the world population was an estimated 6,775,235,700 people.

We cannot possibly hope to be "right" in a world with that many people, especially when it's likely that the other 6,775,235,699 of them would like to be "right" too.

The other part of forgiveness that we have to embrace, if we want a rich and fulfilling life filled with love and abundance, is that we may seek forgiveness from those we have wronged and end up encountering nothing more than their own unforgiveness.

Forgiving someone needs to be an unconditional act..."I forgive you, I release you from the prison of my expectations and intolerance."

Asking someone for forgiveness needs to be an unconditional act..."I ask you to forgive me, but my request is not rooted in an expectation that you will choose to do so."

The other thing to consider is that everyone forgives in their own manner and in their own time.

I asked one of my best and most trusted friends "How do you forgive someone you KNOW you DO NOT want to forgive?"

He'd been in that exact situation with one of his uncles. His response?

"Time and Distance."

We don't always have that luxury. Sometimes we have to forgive someone in the same town, on the same street, under the same roof, in the same bed.

And my final thought is that forgiveness is NEVER an open invitation to the person you are forgiving to do the same, if not worse, thing that caused you to be in a position to forgive them in the first place.

Sometimes forgiveness holds a LITERAL meaning of letting go, releasing the person. Other times, a "mended" relationship may continue.

But it should never be an Ike and Tina Turner thing. There are some people in this world that, if you keep coming back for more, they will give you more...without a shred of remorse.

The extent to which we exert full, deliberate, conscious control over our own lives is the extent to which we will have no time to judge others, punish them for falling short of our "expectations," or destroy ourselves from the inside out. Living in a conscious and deliberate manner is a full-time job. I have first-hand knowledge of that little fact. I have a L-O-N-G way to go, but not nearly as long as a year or two ago when I didn't "get" ANY of this stuff because I was too damned busy trying to be "right" all the time (that was "learned behavior" from my upbringing in a family filled with dysfunctional people who cherished being "right" more than any other thing in their lives).

[Dystopian]

2. You know...

Amerigo:hug:
Age does not equate wisdom...
Thank you...
Emotions run deep...living in the past can be ugly...
I could never reply in kind..

You said it all...
Thank you for being you...
For this...and for things unknown to you...
A beautiful soul...

I'm thankful I didn't log off when I was about to...
There must have been 'something'...

Thank you for sharing....
Sweet dreams...

peace and love to you~

[applegrove]

3. I read somewhere it takes 2 1/2 times the amount of time you were hurt to heal. That is when you

should forgive.

[Dystopian]

5. I wish I could do the math...

But that makes sense...
It does take time...and the 2½ sounds like the right timing...
There were words that I could not ignore ... although I was wronged.
I needed closure ... and learned that only I could provide the closure.
I alone.



peace~

[murielm99]

4. Forgiveness is overrated. n/t

[Dystopian]

6. It's just a word...

But the feeling of actualization is almost like a miracle...

I've experienced it only but a few times in my life...
Burden .... gone.
Memories linger...yet ones inner-soul ... inner-place is forever changed.
This is how it's been in my life....



peace~

[murielm99]

7. There are a few people in my life who feel that if I

forgive them, it allows them to start all over with the hurt they inflicted on me. It gives them the right to repeat their hurtful behavior.

That is not what it is about, but as long as they feel that way, I cannot forgive them.

Also, there are a few other people whom I have apologized to because I hurt them. The apology was genuine. However, they also owed me an apology, and a change in behavior. I never got those things. I got people who felt they had won some sort of contest with me.

I can walk away from some of these people, cut all contact. I can change the way I react to them, with practice. And time may change how I feel. But it will take A LOT OF time.

[Dystopian]

8. "I got people who felt they had won some sort of contest with me."

I know exactly how you feel....
That is the one who I forgave .... I finally got my own closure.

I was in the moment...and there I will remain...
I am the unforgiven .....and only requested closure ....
I thought I'd never get it...I didn't....I did it myself.

I certainly hope time will heal for you...
I still have a little sister I'm waiting on...
My only sibling.
I'm not waiting for her...she's waiting for me....

I feel as you feel...it will take a lot of time....


peace and love~