Watching the slow demise of your dog.

[blueclown]

I can't think of anything more depressing, that is, other than one than watching the slow demise of one of your family members or spouses.

We have this pug named Rudy. Yes, my Dad named him after Rudy Guilani. Yes, he was born a few months after 9/11/01. But I digress. We have had him for 10 years now. He is, quite simply, the best dog you could ask for. This dog does not have a mean bone in his body. In his 10 years, he has never snapped at any of our family, he has not growled at any of our family, and the only person who he has ever gotten into a fight with is his little brother, another pug who is a bit of a punk.

When he turned 5, he became pancreatic insufficient. We gave him powder in his food to supplement this insufficiency, and he was fine. Boy, he still really loves to eat. 3 years later, he suddendly turned blind. It just happened randomly, due to a disease known as SARDS (Sudden Acquired Retinal Degeneration Syndrome). Yet, the blindless didn't stop him from being a happy dog, and the blindless didn't stop our family from loving him unconditionally. Around 6 months later, he was diagnosed as a diabetic, and this is where all his issues started. We just cannot control his bladder. Once we find a diet that agrees with him, another problem pops up. It is beyond frustrating to see his body reject certain foods. We've tried everything. He still eats everything we feed him, but from his stool we can tell certain foods do not agree with him. This is a dog that never peed in the house during his entire life, but he is unable to help himself now. Sometimes we are not home for hours at a time, and he waits patiently. But sometimes he just cannot hold it, and we cannot blame him. But it is sad, to say the least.

This is one of the hardest things I've ever had to deal with. Me, my brother, sister and parents grew up with this dog. He was a huge part of my teenage life. We treated him like he was our brother. He is still alive, he is still happy, but it's getting more and more depressing to watch his body not cooperate with his mind. He still may live another few years, but I feel like he was not given a fair shake in lfie. Such a kind dog, yet he was breeded in a puppy mill as a puppy, sold to use through a "dog shelter" which has since closed down, and has suffered the consequences through no fault of his own.

Has anybody experienced the slow demise of a dog or coat, or something similar? How did you deal with it?

[Seedersandleechers]

1. I am so sorry you are going through this.

I haven't lost any pets but I feel for you. Wish I could give you a hug. :hug: :hug:

[Patiod]

2. I am so sorry. I'm going through the same thing now with our doxie

Back problems, of course. Just as discouraging.

I wish I could tell you how to deal with it, other than just making the old fellow as comfortable as possible, and spending time with him, and not getting too upset with the incontinence. I make sure to go get our little guy and put him up on the sofa with me when we're watching TV because he just wants to hang with his peeps more than anything else.

Rudy sounds like a great little fellow.

[snacker]

3. I've been through this four times...

it never gets any easier. I have always found a bit of comfort from this Ann Landers' column (hope you do too):

A Dog's Plea

I remember bringing you home.
You were so small and cuddly
with your tiny paws and soft fur.
You bounced around the room
with your eyes flashing and ears flopping.
Once in a while you'd let out a little yelp
just to let me know this was your territory.
Making a mess of the house
and chewing on everything in sight
became a passion
and when I scolded you,
you just put your head down
and looked up at me with those innocent eyes
as if to say," I'm Sorry,
but I'll do it again as soon as you're not looking."
As you got older,
you protected me by looking out the window
and barking at everyone who walked by.
When I had a tough day at work,
you would be waiting for me
with your tail wagging just to say,
"Welcome home! I missed you!"
You never had a bad day
and I could always count on you
to be there for me.
When I sat down to watch T.V. or read the paper,
you would hop on my lap looking for attention.
You never asked for anything more
than to have me pat your head
so you could go to sleep with your head over my leg.
As you got older,
you moved around more slowly.
Then one day,
old age finally took its toll,
and you couldn't stand on those wobbly legs anymore.
I knelt down and patted you lying there,
trying to make you young again.
You just looked up at me
as if to say you were old and tired
and that after all of these years of not asking for anything,
you had to ask me to do one last favor.
With tears in my eyes,
I drove you one last time to the vet.
One last time you were lying next to me.
For some strange reason
you were able to stand up in the animal hospital.
Perhaps it was your sense of pride.
As the vet led you away,
you stopped for an instant, turned your head
and looked at me as if to say,
" Thank you for taking care of me."
And I thought, " No . . . Thank you for taking care of me."

[blueclown]

15. That is a beautiful poem.

Wow. Breathtaking.

[michreject]

22. Damn

[dixiegrrrrl]

24. shit..you made me cry.

:cry: :cry: :cry:

[LibertyLover]

4. Yes, I've lost 7 dogs

and of those 7, only 2 died suddenly without any warning. The other 5 I watched die slowly. In each case we made sure they were not suffering and that they had a good quality of life. But, having lost 2 suddenly, I must tell you in all honesty that I prefer to have time to say good bye, to love them just a little longer and to cuddle them as much as possible. My last German Shepherd died fairly young for the breed because of the abuse he suffered before I adopted him. I had two GSDs who had the pancreatic insufficiency and the powdered supplement really helped tremendously. It's difficult to watch your furchildren suffer and I can't tell you how sorry I am to hear about Rudy, but at least you have some time still to love on him.

[Tikki]

5. Tikki (the dog) is 14 years old now...

We know of what you speak. Some people never get or give
ten years of unconditional love in their life.
It's gonna hurt like hell when Rudy goes...we'll be here to listen and
lend support.
You will take Rudy's lesson of love with you, forever,

:hug:


The Tikkis

[applegrove]

6. So sorry. Yes my cat Monster had what we thought was pancreatitus.

He's throw up for months so I had him on a special diet. Then the doctor put him on a steroid and he stopped throwing up but started to loose tons of weight - which means cancer. Then he started sleeping in dark corners and crying in pain if I touched him. He'd still get up on my bed to purr and purr but the pain was getting the best of him. Several times I almost took him in to put him to sleep. This went on for a month. When he went two days in agony I said that is it. Put him out of his misery. The doctor said that cats will often hide their pain for weeks on end so if he was showing it it was better to put him down early rather than late. I cried so hard. But he was no longer suffering. I think of him every day. He was the greatest lap cat. Sorry for your loss.

[canoeist52]

7. So hard to know when it's time, blueclown.

Everyone in the family has to be ready. Our Rocky looked at me and his eyes said "please make it stop". Rudy will let you know with his eyes. It's the last kindness we can do for them.

So many of us here have been through this. I can attest to the kindness of Du lounge.

[TorchTheWitch]

8. yep, going through it the second time around

All pets eventually go through a slow demise either from illness or old age if they don't die suddenly and/or tragically. That's just life. It's always sad and depressing. It should be. If it wasn't sad and depressing then you don't love your pet.

My dog is dying from bone cancer. Amazingly, he's still doing rather well though I never in a million years believed I could be insane enough to hope that he would make it to the end of March. It's more frustrating for me now because his latest issues are only generally related to the cancer... it's not pain or metathesizing that is the problem, it's stupid infections because his immune system is so screwed up because of the cancer and getting him to eat enough to maintain weight because he needs to eat nearly three times as much as he did when he was healthy because late stage cancer very often puts your metabolism into warp drive, episodes of diarrhea from the mega-meds, etc. Every day I have to objectively evaluate how he's doing, and so far, so good... but that could change next week or even tomorrow. I'm so happy I got these months with him I never ever thought possible and part of that is because it's helped me to get a grip on coming to terms with his situation and that I'm going to lose him soon.

Despite everything though, when the decision must be made to send him on his final journey it's still going to hit me like a ton of bricks and tear out my heart. I'm well aware of that. Just last weekend I had a huge scare because he very suddenly couldn't get around much at all on his one good back leg, and he already was having another infection problem and a damn diarrhea episode at the same time. Raced him to the vet and thought that it might end up being his time, but he got some new medications to add to the list, and the problem with his one good back leg seems to have been something simple like he may have stepped on a sharp pebble or something because by the end of the day he was going upstairs on his own. I'll be thrilled if he lasts to the end of August, but I know better than to allow myself that kind of hope... one day at a time is how I have to deal with it.

What is so hard is objectively evaluating their quality of life day by day. It's so difficult to make yourself be objective when you love them so much. But loving them so much also means being willing to let them go so they don't suffer only for our sakes.

If the dog can do the basics like get around on his own, eat, drink and go to the bathroom sufficiently and also has a good attitude and seems happy than it's not his time yet. For the most part they seem to let you know when they've had enough and are ready to go. Enjoy each day that you can with him and think of it as a gift. His time will come all too soon... it's always too soon when you love them so. :(

[MerryBlooms]

9. Going through this now with our 17 y/o doxie.

It aches as much as losing any other family member. =(

[RebelOne]

10. Dupe post. My computer is going crazy. n/t

[RebelOne]

11. Dupe post

[RebelOne]

12. I am so sorry. I feel your pain.

I had to watch my Rottweiler slowly go downhill because she had liver and bone cancer. I gave her so many meds to keep her comfortable, but after a while the meds were not working any more and she could not even walk because of the bone cancer in her leg. It was a sad day when we had to make the final visit to the vet. But I knew she would no longer be in pain. She went to doggy heaven just 2 weeks short of her 13th birthday. Believe me, it was hard to deal with because she was my best friend and the sweetest Rottie you would ever meet. She did not have a mean bone in her body. She loved other dogs, especially puppies, and never even chased a cat. This July 20 was the first anniversary of her death. I still miss her immensely. I had her cremated and have her ashes.

You really have my deepest sympathy as I know the anguish you are feeling.

[RebelOne]

13. Dupe posts. For some reason, I cannot delete them. n/t

[SoCalDem]

14. Everyone who loves a pet, has to go through this

:cry:

It's a bitter price to pay, but we all pay it...because to not have had them is worse.

It's very sad to watch their decline, but I think they really only notice the love they get, and someday (maybe soon for you), you will be there to help them escape their pain.

:hug:

[blueclown]

16. Thanks for the kind words, everybody.

You don't know how much I appreciate it. I guess the best I can do is to just give him comfort as much as I can until he finally says "I've had enough".

[Amerigo Vespucci]

17. I did...

...I had a dog that my parents got for me as a kid. We moved to California when I was 16. She was with us for a few years after that, then died.

We took her to the vet once, near the end of her life. We thought it was over. She somehow perked up and was filled with energy right before we got there. We were overjoyed, but it didn't last.

It creeps up on you. You go from puppy / kitten to an animal near the end of its life expectancy, and because that happened day by day over a number of years, there was no way to see it coming.

The way we dealt with it was to realize we did the best we could do to provide a safe home, filled with love. Our dog was never at the mercy of other animals, or cars, or any other danger, and she never had to hunt down her food. She was loved as a puppy and loved until the last day she could be with us, and when we had to let her go it hurt like hell, but we never let her go completely. We held onto the love.

I am sorry you are going through this. We all do eventually. Just hold onto the love, and treasure every day you have with him as a gift, because that's what it is.

[LeftyMom]

18. I'm sorry he's going through all that.

Can you get him some puppy pads to keep inside, or put a dog door in? They have secure ones that are triggered by the dog's collar if you're concerned about that. That won't help with the other issues obviously, but if he's doing okay with pottying when you're home, he probably finds it distressing to have to break potty training and go inside when he can't wait.

I have a cat with extensive allergies, so I know how the food issues go and I sympathize. At least he's a little guy, so increasingly expensive foods with weird ingredients won't break the bank the way they would if you were feeding a great big animal. That's what I tell myself anyway...

[blueclown]

21. He is inside 95% of the time.

The only time he is ever outside is to go to the bathroom - it's way too hot for him to be outside, and he never liked being outside anyways.

I bought him a bone yesterday - it's not the best thing for his digestive system, but it won't hurt and it gives him some happiness.

[johnaries]

19. I was in complete denial. I saw the signs.

I knew, deep inside, that it was his time. I asked the Vet if it was time, and he said he didn't think so. So I didn't choose euthansia.

He escaped the fence, and I found him siding in the middle of the ice cold creek. I forced him to come home. He escaped the fence again, and after calling my neighbor he looked out his window and said "yeah, he's sitting in the middle of the field." For the first time, he snapped at me when I tried to move him. But, he eventually gave up and followed me home.

The next day, he was gone again. This time, I never found him. It finally sunk in that he was simply looking for a good place to "pass on."

He was the best dog, ever. I have another dog now that I love and loves me. But there will never be another Asimov. I only wish that I had let him go sooner, when he was ready. I know now that I only extended his pain because I couldn't let him go. I will try to never be so selfish, again.

[Odin2005]

20. I lost my dog, a Pommeranian, to congestive heart falure in 2005.

I still miss him! :(

[GoCubsGo]

23. I'm sorry. I know how it is.

I had to euthanize my kitty in May. He had chronic renal failure, and lived just over a year after he was diagnosed. It was like living on a roller coaster, but one with a general downward trajectory. I did what I could to keep him comfortable. That's all you can do, sometimes. He would have been 17 this week, if he had made it that far.

[kimi]

25. Oh, I am so sorry

This must be heartbreaking for you and your family. Yes, I've lived with a cat with long-term renal failure - she lived about 8 months after diagnosis, and we did the sub-q fluids on an increasing schedule, had her go through with all the regular bloodwork (she was so shy and skittish and it totally terrified her to go to the vet), and watched her become incontinent and weak. The night before we were going to take her to be put to sleep, she died beside me. I think it was the greatest gift I've ever been given, that she didn't have to go through that last visit.

I didn't deal with it well, at first, when she got sick. There was a lot of denial, then I suddenly realized that she was terminal, this wasn't going to be fixed. That was rough. Then I just wanted her to be safe and secure, I babied her a lot. Took her outdoors in the sunshine, talked to her. I also joined a pet loss forum, and it was incredibly supportive, really helped me. Much like the one here, really.

I'm sorry you're going through this. Peace to you all.

[Tracyjo]

26. Ask your vet about Proin tablets

I have a 12 year old Husky with incontinence. It works wonders.

[Enthusiast]

27. I know how you feel, blueclown.

Our old dog can barely see, and she cannot hear at all. She has lost a bunch of weight -probably over 50%! And, unlike your Rudy, she is not a good girl. She has always been snippy and she bullies the kitty. She has bitten us several times, often in a misguided defense of food. But we love her anyway keep her going as best we can.

[alphafemale]

28. On a Good Dog - Ogden Nash

On a Good Dog

O, my little pup ten years ago
was arrogant and spry,
Her backbone was a bended bow
for arrows in her eye.
Her step was proud, her bark was loud,
her nose was in the sky,
But she was ten years younger then,
And so, by God, was I.

Small birds on stilts along the beach
rose up with piping cry.
And as they rose beyond her reach
I thought to see her fly.
If natural law refused her wings,
that law she would defy,
for she could do unheard-of things,
and so, at times, could I.

Ten years ago she split the air
to seize what she could spy;
Tonight she bumps against a chair,
betrayed by milky eye!
She seems to pant, Time up, time up!
My little dog must die,
And lie in dust with Hector's pup;
So, presently, must I.



http://foseti.wordpress.com/2008/04/01/dog-poetry-by-ogden-nash/

[MerryBlooms]

29. Our mini doxie is 16, I understand.

Patience, care, love and tears. =(

[Curmudgeoness]

30. You are doing everything you can do, and we have all been there.

Please continue to do what can be done, and don't be afraid to say it is time to say goodbye. This is a subjective decision, and only you will know when that time comes, and when it does, do your pup a favor. I always ask myself if I am keeping my pet alive for myself or for the pet. It is usually for selfish reasons.

But, since Rudy is still apparently a happy dog, you might make it easier on him if you were to get those puppy pads for him to use in the house when he must. At least you will know where to do a clean up, and he will not have a loss of self-esteem for having done something that he knows he should not do.

Best of luck. :hug:

[mysuzuki2]

31. I know what you mean

my golden retriever Duffy is almost 15. I've had him since he was 10 weeks old-a 10 lb bundle of red fur with 2 crossed eyes and 4 huge feet. His back legs don't work so good nymore and he is having accidents in the house. He still seems happy and full of life though. He and I are going down the far side of the hill together since I am in my 60s now. Funny, I have escaped prostate problems but he has not. I have to get up at night with him anyway. He has been a great dog, a true friend and a wonderful person. When he goes part of me will go too.

[Dappleganger]

32. Yes, it's hard. In my experience they have a way of letting you know

when a decision needs to be made. It's heartbreaking but it's also the price of befriending a furry friend. They give us so much and they look to us to be there to be friends until and through the end.

:hug: