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Amerigo Vespucci (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore | Sun Feb-13-11 07:02 PM Original message |
Poll question: Do you forgive people who f*** you over and don't come within a mile of remorse or an apology? |
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seabeyond (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore | Sun Feb-13-11 07:14 PM Response to Original message |
1. i have an odd place with forgiveness. people do things for all kinds of reason. |
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Amerigo Vespucci (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore | Sun Feb-13-11 07:20 PM Response to Reply #1 |
2. Very interesting...I forget sometimes how our emotions are "permission-based"... |
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Haole Girl (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore | Sun Feb-13-11 07:23 PM Response to Original message |
3. Depends on what they did. Not all "damage can be repaired." nt |
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Amerigo Vespucci (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore | Sun Feb-13-11 07:30 PM Response to Reply #3 |
4. And I guess there's an additional layer to this as well that I hadn't considered... |
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rbnyc (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore | Sun Feb-13-11 08:01 PM Response to Original message |
5. This forgiveness quote was... |
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Kali (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore | Sun Feb-13-11 08:25 PM Response to Original message |
6. I hold grudges. |
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Lisa0825 (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore | Sun Feb-13-11 08:54 PM Response to Reply #6 |
10. I consider holding grudges to mean that you made a wise choice. |
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hobbit709 (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore | Sun Feb-13-11 11:09 PM Response to Reply #6 |
22. As was once said |
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Mojorabbit (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore | Mon Feb-14-11 01:34 AM Response to Reply #6 |
26. I rarely hold grudges |
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Amerigo Vespucci (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore | Mon Feb-14-11 01:16 PM Response to Reply #6 |
45. I'm not convinced that people who do things "intentionally" are ever fully remorseful |
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cbdo2007 (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore | Sun Feb-13-11 08:31 PM Response to Original message |
7. I don't spend one second thinking about them. |
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bluestateguy (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore | Sun Feb-13-11 08:33 PM Response to Original message |
8. As a general rule, no |
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solara (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore | Sun Feb-13-11 08:36 PM Response to Original message |
9. Sometimes forgiveness comes easily, but more often it's extremely difficult |
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prolesunited (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore | Sun Feb-13-11 08:59 PM Response to Original message |
11. Forgiveness is what you do for yourself |
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Amerigo Vespucci (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore | Sun Feb-13-11 09:12 PM Response to Reply #11 |
14. I was telling a friend that yesterday... |
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Swede (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore | Sun Feb-13-11 09:03 PM Response to Original message |
12. Forgiving is good for your own peace of mind. |
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Patiod (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore | Mon Feb-14-11 11:57 AM Response to Reply #12 |
41. "The acid of hate destroys the container" |
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Rabrrrrrr (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore | Sun Feb-13-11 09:07 PM Response to Original message |
13. Of course. If they show remorse or offer an apology, there's little need for forgiveness. |
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one_voice (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore | Sun Feb-13-11 09:19 PM Response to Original message |
15. I've never been one to hold a grudge... |
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RandomThoughts (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore | Sun Feb-13-11 09:20 PM Response to Original message |
16. Sure why not. |
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Demoiselle (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore | Sun Feb-13-11 09:29 PM Response to Original message |
17. You do exactly what works best for you. |
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La Lioness Priyanka (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore | Sun Feb-13-11 09:37 PM Response to Original message |
18. i have, and can attest it's a stupid idea. if people don't show remorse |
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Amerigo Vespucci (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore | Mon Feb-14-11 09:59 AM Response to Reply #18 |
37. That's absolutely true, and the challenge is... |
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cali (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore | Sun Feb-13-11 09:41 PM Response to Original message |
19. It depends. I forgave my ex who abused me and he wasn't remorseful |
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WildEyedLiberal (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore | Sun Feb-13-11 10:15 PM Response to Original message |
20. No, but it really depends on what you mean by "forgiveness" |
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Blue_In_AK (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore | Sun Feb-13-11 11:05 PM Response to Original message |
21. I used to do that, |
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pacalo (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore | Mon Feb-14-11 12:47 AM Response to Original message |
23. I'm usually very forgiving because I'm generally a happy person. I get angrier when |
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Kat45 (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore | Mon Feb-14-11 01:00 AM Response to Original message |
24. Sort of. |
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orleans (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore | Mon Feb-14-11 01:20 AM Response to Original message |
25. eventually. sometimes it takes me awhile. but i usually don't forget |
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struggle4progress (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore | Mon Feb-14-11 04:24 AM Response to Original message |
27. "If a man is crossing a river and an empty boat collides with his own skiff, even though he be |
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Amerigo Vespucci (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore | Mon Feb-14-11 08:52 AM Response to Reply #27 |
29. I remember a similar thought, expressed far less eloquently... |
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old mark (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore | Mon Feb-14-11 05:23 AM Response to Original message |
28. Other- I try not to waste time thinking about them, but I don't forgive |
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BlueIris (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore | Mon Feb-14-11 08:57 AM Response to Original message |
30. Forgiveness is earned. Those without empathy don't deserve it. |
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WildEyedLiberal (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore | Mon Feb-14-11 12:51 PM Response to Reply #30 |
42. +1 |
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mopinko (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore | Mon Feb-14-11 09:16 AM Response to Original message |
31. it depends on whether i have to see them around. |
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Amerigo Vespucci (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore | Mon Feb-14-11 09:50 AM Response to Reply #31 |
36. I once asked a good friend / mentor (and former boss)... |
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Orsino (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore | Mon Feb-14-11 09:22 AM Response to Original message |
32. Sometimes. |
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Crystal Clarity (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore | Mon Feb-14-11 09:24 AM Response to Original message |
33. The first one for me |
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raccoon (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore | Mon Feb-14-11 09:39 AM Response to Original message |
34. If you forgive somebody, it doesn't mean you have to let them back in your life. |
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LeftishBrit (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore | Mon Feb-14-11 09:50 AM Response to Original message |
35. No. That is, I don't generally lower myself to their level to get revenge... |
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Amerigo Vespucci (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore | Mon Feb-14-11 10:03 AM Response to Reply #35 |
39. It seems like "forgive" can mean many things |
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Tuesday Afternoon (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore | Mon Feb-14-11 10:02 AM Response to Original message |
38. wow. |
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Blasphemer (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore | Mon Feb-14-11 11:54 AM Response to Original message |
40. No forgiveness (apology or not ) if it is something truly heinous.... nt |
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EnviroBat (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore | Mon Feb-14-11 12:56 PM Response to Original message |
43. The ex-girlfirend. Wants to be forgiven. Wants me back. |
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Amerigo Vespucci (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore | Mon Feb-14-11 01:10 PM Response to Reply #43 |
44. Had an ex-girlfriend who, near the end of our relationship... |
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EnviroBat (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore | Mon Feb-14-11 03:07 PM Response to Reply #44 |
47. Yeah, mine up and went running back to her waste-of-life ex-husband, |
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Lucian (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore | Mon Feb-14-11 01:22 PM Response to Original message |
46. Everyone holds grudges. |
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GoddessOfGuinness (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore | Mon Feb-14-11 03:22 PM Response to Original message |
48. Forgive, yes; but if I've rescinded my trust, they'll have to work very hard |
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InvisibleTouch (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore | Mon Feb-14-11 03:27 PM Response to Original message |
49. Where is the "Hell No" option here? n/t |
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Iggo (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore | Mon Feb-14-11 03:32 PM Response to Original message |
50. Aw hell no. It's off to DTM'sville with those emmer-effers. |
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lunatica (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore | Mon Feb-14-11 05:06 PM Response to Original message |
51. If I get an apology I fogive and if not I just let it go but I never forget |
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Bucky (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore | Mon Feb-14-11 05:35 PM Response to Original message |
52. Why are you asking me about my family? |
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TuxedoKat (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore | Mon Feb-14-11 06:17 PM Response to Original message |
53. I'd rather forgive |
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Moondog (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore | Mon Feb-14-11 06:21 PM Response to Original message |
54. I have a nuanced answer. |
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TNLib (683 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore | Mon Feb-14-11 07:24 PM Response to Original message |
55. This sounds terrible but I tend to live by |
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BreweryYardRat (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore | Mon Feb-14-11 07:48 PM Response to Original message |
56. Hell no. |
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SOteric (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore | Mon Feb-14-11 09:40 PM Response to Original message |
57. Forgiveness isn't about what the offender deserves. |
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Rabrrrrrr (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore | Mon Feb-14-11 10:30 PM Response to Reply #57 |
59. Thank you, O Awesome One! These threads on forgiveness forever chap my ass |
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Tuesday Afternoon (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore | Tue Feb-15-11 12:13 AM Response to Reply #59 |
61. + 1000 and throw in a brazillion for good measure |
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SOteric (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore | Wed Feb-16-11 12:43 AM Response to Reply #59 |
69. Sorry to hear about your ass-chapping |
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Old Troop (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore | Mon Feb-14-11 10:18 PM Response to Original message |
58. They need forgiveness more than I need an apology |
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Common Sense Party (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore | Tue Feb-15-11 12:08 AM Response to Original message |
60. Okay, fine, I'll SAY it: I'm sorry. |
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fortyfeetunder (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore | Tue Feb-15-11 12:30 AM Response to Original message |
62. Emotional bank account...the individual bankrupted it. |
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dd2003 (198 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore | Tue Feb-15-11 01:01 AM Response to Original message |
63. forgive |
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darkstar3 (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore | Tue Feb-15-11 01:29 AM Response to Original message |
64. I do not trust easily, or often, |
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davsand (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore | Tue Feb-15-11 02:00 PM Response to Original message |
65. That ass you are kicking today may be one you gotta kiss tomorrow. |
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ellenrr (619 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore | Tue Feb-15-11 04:20 PM Response to Original message |
66. No I carry a grudge forever. |
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cheneyschernobyl (137 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore | Tue Feb-15-11 09:49 PM Response to Original message |
67. Still waiting for ex-wifey to |
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grahamhgreen (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore | Tue Feb-15-11 09:53 PM Response to Original message |
68. The problem with not forgiving is that it digs a hole in your own heart. |
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quakerboy (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore | Wed Feb-16-11 02:03 AM Response to Original message |
70. Bad people are like defective furniture |
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raccoon (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore | Wed Feb-16-11 09:45 AM Response to Original message |
71. I read this on another forum, and it was very helpful to me: |
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WinkyDink (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore | Wed Feb-16-11 03:15 PM Response to Original message |
72. I'm Sicilian-Irish. What do you think? :-) |
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