I have had a tough day so I am giving away hugs, it has been that kind of day.

[texanwitch]

My Mother is in the hospital with her heart condition and I just made a decison.

It is made, it is done.

:hug:

[Rosie1223]

1. Sounds like you could use one yourself

:hug:

[joneschick]

2. hugs are good

--but very gently, cuz everything hurts. :hi:

[Haole Girl]

3. Hugs to you, texanwitch

You ok?

:hug:

[texanwitch]

5. My Mom is in ICU, had her heart attack.

She has a advanced case of alzheimers, she doesn't know anyone or anything now.

The surgery to save her would very painful and would only give her a year or so.

I talked with her Drs. and will be going to hospice when she can.

This was a tough one.

[Haole Girl]

7. Oh no

Nobody should have to make a decision like that. I'm so sorry that fell onto your shoulders.

:hug:

[joneschick]

12. been there...

:hug:

[CaliforniaPeggy]

4. My dear texanwitch!

Now, that's the ticket!

A sure-fire way to help yourself feel better is to help someone else feel better too!

Hugs for you, sweetie...:hug: :hug: :hug:

End of life issues are so damn hard...

Hang in there, sweetie...

[texanwitch]

8. I knew it was coming soon.

She is sleeping so there is no pain.

:hug:

[femmocrat]

6. I don't need one as much as you do....

:hug: Best wishes, texanwitch

[madinmaryland]

9. Hugs and my sympathy to you.

:hug:

[foxfeet]

10. Blessings to you and your mom.

I wish you both peace and comfort. :hug:

[woo me with science]

11. I am very sorry.

Peace to you. Those decisions are so hard.

[texanwitch]

15. She has not been awake the whole time.

:hug:

[MilesColtrane]

13. No way....I'm not falling for it!

It's a trap.




I'll have to give you one instead.

:hug:

[texanwitch]

16. Now you made me laugh.

:hug:

[Call Me Wesley]

14. Hugs for you and good vibes for your mom.

:hug:

[texanwitch]

17. Moither had a interesting life,

:hug:

[siligut]

18. You made the hardest decision.

Taking the emotion out of the equation is very hard when it comes someone whom you love so much. But, from what you are describing, you came to the best decision, you made the hard choice, and that takes strength. Glad that you have the insight and are able to apply it, you have saved a lot of grief for all. As you said, she isn't aware, that isn't life, so really you would just be prolonging her death in a painful and stressful way. Thank you for telling us she had a good life, that means so much. :hug:

[texanwitch]

19. Thank you.

This was the only choice to make, no one else wanted to make it.

She might have died having the surgery.

Everyone needs to talk with your family about your wishes and have a living will.

My Mother did, I was just following her wishes.

:hug:

[hamsterjill]

20. You make me proud to be from Texas

I am so sorry that you are faced with this situation, but I believe you've handled it well, handled it with dignity and compassion, and made the best decisions faced with the reality that you have.

I wish your family the best during this difficult time.

[Ilsa]

21. Sweetheart, I am so sorry. It was a tough call, but I think you

made a compassionate decision. I feel for you, having to deal with that decision yourself. I hope there isn't anyone who will second-guess it and give you grief.

I've recently spoken with a friend about writing a new health care proxy giving a sibling her proxy. The current proxy still has the soon-to-be-ex listed, and that could cause her siblings great distress if it ever had to be exercised. Her daughter is in her twenties, but she doesn't want to pass that responsibility on to her.

I hope everything goes well for your family during these tough times.

[texanwitch]

22. Everyone agrees with me but nobody else wanted the make the decsion.

Your friend needs to get busy and make that change, anything can happen.

Her daughter sounds to young to have to make that choice.

Family members are coming to pay their visit in the next few days.

I told them not to wait to long, she could pass in the hospital.

She has a prepayed funeral plan, so everything is taken care of.

Just the waiting now.

[Ilsa]

23. It sounds like you were raised to be the brave one. Or you learned

it on your own. I'm sorry you had to do it on your own.

[texanwitch]

24. I had to grow up fast.

The end will come for all of us.

It is just hard for some people to let their loved ones go.

I will view my Mother's passing as a blessing.

She is suffering a living death now.

I had all the tubes and wires taken away.

She is pain free as possible, not really awake now.

She is 87 years old, and had a great, interesting life.

[MiddleFingerMom]

25. MiddleFingerMomMom lived to be 81.

.
.
.
She was in endstage Alzheimer's and her belief system told her that
all her friends and loved ones who had gone before her would be
waiting for her with open arms in a beautiful place.
.
MiddleFingerMomSis had her Power of Attorney (as it should have been --
she's much more practical and responsible than I), but when our social
worker asked her (us) if we wanted any extraordinary measures taken to
save/prolong her life, she simply stared at me, unable to form any kind
of answer.
.
"No." Simple... immediate. As you said, the only answer. The only truly
compassionate answer. I didn't hesitate and I've never even considered
second-guessing or doubting that answer. I loved her very much.
.
When the time came, she went in her sleep -- peacefully, easily, and
painlessly. As far as deaths go, one could not wish for better.
.
.
You made the only decent answer that could have been made. When
you fully realize that, you will be at peace with your decision and no
one will be able to make you feel guilty about having done the loving
thing -- least of all yourself.
.
.
You have done the right thing. You have done a good thing.
.
You are loving. You are loved.
.
.
:hug:
.
.

[Forkboy]

26. Well, I've had a fine day, so let me give you one. You need it more than me.

:hug:

[Flaxbee]

27. I'll take one, because hugs are nice, and give one back

:hug:

My mom has a heart condition, and Alzheimer's currently at bay with the magic of Aricept (I rarely sing the praises of any big pharma drug, but for my mother, Aricept has been incredible).

But I do know that a decision is coming one day, unless a massive stroke or heart attack or other big zinger takes the decision out of my hands.... I also have two sisters I'm close to, so at least there is some immediate family support.

Anyway. :hug: Just because something can be done (surgery) doesn't mean it should be; there are so many factors in a decision like that and it sounds like you made a very gentle and benevolent one.