My Mother's alzheimers is really getting bad, she does not know anyone.

[texanwitch]

The poor soul is just lost.

This is worse then death.

I had my visit today at her nursing home, yeah she is gone.

I never really knew her but still it is sad.

[lunatica]

1. It's very hard for everyone involved

I hope they find a cure very soon. And a way of preventing it. My mother had Dementia though Aricept kept it from progressing to the point she didn't know us. We took care of her at home for 5 years. You just put your life on hold when it happens.

[texanwitch]

2. I hope a cure is coming,

She in a special section of the home, in a safe place.

I know what you mean about putting one's life on hold.

I am taking herbs hoping this will keep this away from me.

This is a true living death.

[MiddleFingerMom]

3. I'm sorry you're going through this along with her... BUT...

.
.
...at least you're THERE -- along with her.
.
.
MiddleFingerMomMom was very much the same way...
eventually greeting me sweetly with no sign of
recognition in her eyes or voice.
.
.
Nights can be bad for full-on Alzheimer's patients,
but days are usually not -- they become very sweet
and hardcore childlike again. MiddleFingerMomGrandmom
had been dead for 40 years, but MiddleFingerMom didn't
want me to let her know if she'd been "naughty" that
day.
.
.
I used to read to MiddleFingerMomMom from her beloved
series of Oz books from her childhood (mine, too) --
even when she had gone beyond communicating at all.
I believed that part of her consciousness was still
"there" -- DEEP -- and that I was providing some
comfort and interest for that part of her.
.
.
If it helps, I think Alzheimer's patients are MUCH
happier once they reach the stage your mother's at --
they're no longer tortured by the knowledge of what
they're in the process of losing.
.
.
.
:hug:
.
.

[texanwitch]

5. The home has story time, she seemed to enjoy it.

I have to go back this week and talk with the Dr.

My brothers and sister have just walked away, she didn't leave them any money.

Thank you for your kind words, I hope she is happy.

She gave me to my Aunt to raise, I had a good life because of this.

I owe her for this.

She has been angry until now, this seems to be behind her now.

I picked this place because I wanted her to be safe when the time came.

[CaliforniaPeggy]

4. My dear texanwitch...

It IS a horrible disease...

The body lives on while the mind is really gone.

Researchers are working on a way to diagnose it before it becomes visible to people. I guess they hope to figure out ways to halt or at least slow down the progression...

I want someone to shoot me if I ever get it.

:hug:

[texanwitch]

7. The brain dies but the body goes on.

I have a living will, just let me go.

[MiddleFingerMom]

8. And I'm sure you'll look as wonderfully gorgeous...

.
.
.
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as the other pictures people have shot of you.
.
.

[CaliforniaPeggy]

10. My dear MiddleFingerMom...

I'm not sure I understand your meaning....

You can PM me if you like...

[MiddleFingerMom]

11. Your comment about wanting someone to "shoot" you.

(anally edited -- not as painful as it sounds -- to add just ONE letter that I missed)
.
.
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I was just being wilfully ignorant.
.
.
.
I met a woman who was a nationally legendary community radio station
manager at a coupla national conferences I went to.
.
I liked her a lot.
.
She told me once, "I like YOU a lot, too. You're... contrary."
.
.
.
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Aside from when my 5-year-old niece descrbed me as "you're ... ... different,
aren't you?" and considering the source... that is still one of my favorite
compliments ever.
.

[CaliforniaPeggy]

12. OK...I got it, lol!

Different kinds of shot...

I think we can all be contrary sometimes...

Your niece was spot on...;-)

[Tikki]

6. Yuck...it's hard to see anyone fade away...

Even someone you didn't know well.

Good for you stopping in on her.

Tikki

[texanwitch]

9. I seem to be the only one, no big surprise there.

Several church groups come over and visit.

Nursing homes are not that bad a place to visit.

[applegrove]

13. So sorry you all have to go through this. Yes it is a devastating disease.

[texanwitch]

15. Thanks applegrove.

I talked to the Dr. today and she has a heart problem now.

He asked me if I wanted her to have surgery, I said no.

You know you are a adult when you make that choice for someone else.

[applegrove]

16. Oh that is so hard. vibes.

[texanwitch]

18. I see no point in putting her in pain at her age and illness.

Her brain is dieing, she doesn't have that long.

[HipChick]

14. I'm so sorry texan...

:grouphug:

[texanwitch]

17. Thank you HipChick.

So many of us are or will be facing this problem with our parents.

I wouldn't wish this illness on anyone.

[HipChick]

19. True...I've seen this in my cousin

She was one of the most independent,fiesty females I know, she had a stroke, aneurysm one day..never recovered she barely recognizes anyone..she's 49, and having to be on a nursing care with people much older

[texanwitch]

20. I have a dear friend who had a aneurysm, she has recovered a great deal.

She can walk and talk but my old friend is not there.

I miss her, she was great fun.

My friend will never work again and her husband as to take care of her.

My friend was very independent also.

[kimi]

21. I'm so sorry

I can understand your pain. I wish you didn't have to go through this.

My mom is in the early stages herself. It's very confusing to deal with, knowing her as an extremely intelligent and active woman who lived a hard life, and now is facing this.

Best wishes, and take care of yourself.

[texanwitch]

22. This will be very hard time for her, she knows what is happening.

Spent as much time with her has you can now.

If she get angry don't get mad, you Mom can't help it.

I would get mad to.

When she can't remember you that will be a very hard time.

My mother thought I was her cousin she grew up with.

[kimi]

23. Yes, and thank you

For reaching out in your time of trouble. She does know that she's becoming confused and doesn't understand why, and that is sad to see.

She made a questionable - to me now, anyway - decision to marry a man who took her to a different state a few years ago and so I don't see her often, but I try to talk to her on the phone every few days so I can tell that she's getting very confused.

Aging is hard on all of us, I used to think it was just creaky knees and arthritis and not being able to chase the kids as much. But it's a lot more than that.

My best to you and your mom. :hug:

[MiddleFingerMom]

24. Really WORK the good memories of your time with her now.

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Many times it was HARD to see MiddleFingerMomMom as so... diminished.
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Other times she was SO sweet and innocent -- once, when I walked in
her room she smiled and asked, "I KNOW you, don't I? I can tell that
because it feels SO good to see you."
.
My FAVORITE EVER memory of MiddleFingerMomMom oddly enough came
during the last part of her illness (which fortunately didn't last more than
a month or so). She had confessed to me when she was still very much
aware of her life and surroundings that she used to telephone me when
she was very depressed (but not let on to me how she felt) because she
KNEW that I would have her laughing by the end of the call. This made
me feel WONDERFUL.
.
Well, during that last stage, she had stopped talking to anyone for
about a week at this point, although most of what I said and read to
her seemed to register. I came into her room one night and asked right
off if she would like a piece of chocolate from her nightstand (she had
a FEROCIOUS forbidden sweet tooth).
.
She sighed D-E-E-P-L-Y and shook her head. It was terrible -- I
realized just how bad that day must have been for her to turn down
some candy. She waited a good 10 seconds or so, broke into this
HUGE mischievous grin, and said -- (SAID!!!}, "You believed me?"
.
She had used everything she had left to break back out of that terrible
wall momentarily -- and she did it to make ME laugh for a change!!!
.
That one moment trumps ALL the bad moments -- even now, when I
think of it, my heart grows bigger than the rest of me.
.
.
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Recognize good moments, small or large. They will almost certainly be
there if you allow yourself to see.

[texanwitch]

26. My Mother thought I was her cousin and we were kids together.

I would play along.

Toward the end my Mother liked to color, so I bought lots of coloring books.

I bought the biggest set of colors I could find, she loved them.

Now she just sits and looks out the window, or at the tv.

[proteus_lives]

25. I'm so sorry.

My father has short-term memory issues and is terrified of Alzheimer's.

He's told me he'd rather suicide than suffer what he called a "living death".

[texanwitch]

27. Has he been to a Dr. yet.

My mother didn't go in time to get early help.

[proteus_lives]

28. He's been to an army of them.

It has to do with his liver disease and past history of drug abuse. They can treat it but they can't fix it.

He's dealing with it. But it's hard for the family. He's a proud man and it's not easy to admit he's not as capable as he used to be.

[texanwitch]

29. Been there.

My Father had a hard time dealing with health when it declined.

He seems happy now in his nursing home.

He almost died a few months ago but made it.

It was hard on him, took a lot out of him.

I think he is still alive because of the friends he made in the home.

He wanted to get back to them.

Hope your Dad finds some peace with his illness, whatever happens.

[elocs]

30. My mother has not known me for years and has been in the nursing home for 12 years.

None of us really knows what goes on in the head and brains of those who have Alzheimers. This disease may actually be worse for the family, friends, and loved ones. They may actually be in their own world, a better one for them in their condition than the real one. When I would go to visit my mother and she was sleeping I would let her sleep because I figured her dreams were much likely a better place than the waking world.

[caitxrawks]

31. i'm so sorry :(

My grandpa has dementia, I'm not sure if it's full blown Alzheimers, but I know the pain of them not knowing you.

That also happened to my stepdad's parents before they died. His mom became violent, but his dad was just so confused.

It's so sad and horrible. Nobody deserves to go through such a thing. :(