Why don't supervisors understand the difference between respect and fear?

[arbusto_baboso]

Or that the two are mutually exclusive feelings to have for a boss?

And why don't they get that morale problems are not solved by instituting policies that essentially say, "I don't trust you"?

[RandomThoughts]

1. I have a thought on trust, I actually don't want to be trusted.

I think it leads to problems, it claims that a person knows more then another.

I would rather have someone think and feel, and agree or disagree based on their best abilities.

trust creates followers, and requires claims of being right by the person being trusted.

But most important people are both good and bad, so a person has to be able to think and feel on each comment or action and decide if they are more good or more bad. To just follow someone is to assign your thinking and feeling to that person.

Long ago while working retail, I remember trust was used as a way to break accountability. One person at a time was suppose to be in the safe, then it was counted in and out on shift change so there was accountability. But sometimes people would say they trust you and want you to go get something out of the safe when it was their shift. But what it really did was break accountability by them being able to later say there was more then one person in the safe.

I would say I don't want to be trusted, I want to be held accountable. Because by me being accountable in that situation, so are they. Some times people want you to trust them because they know if you think and feel on something then you will see it different. Note that accountable is not targeted nor two tier justice, but equal justice in my view.

However thinking and feeling is learned, so sometimes trust appears in groups by assumptions of someone knowing more then someone else, that has to be known to trust someone. And even that is feeling or thinking on something.

I think most of my typing can be trusted to be pretty consistent, but not sure about the videos posted, there is many ways to see them, I think they are mostly interesting, but do not trust them since I did not make them, and find many of them both good and bad, instead I try to use them as riddles to help in thought.


That does not mean justice should not have mercy, just that it should be applied without favor outside of justice. And justice should have multiple chances, and even ways to move past problems, but again available to everyone. It is not a support for security state where every infraction is penalized, but where when infractions are bad enough then their is an equal form of justice for those in that situation. The intent of justice should be to establish a base line of acceptable behavior, and sometimes that means punishment for people, but it should also be motivating by giving methods for people to move forward, but not by an arbitrary weight like money used as deciding who is at fault and who is not, but more by intent and action.

[livetohike]

2. Because many supervisors were thrown into/promoted to the

job without having basic "people skills". Many supervisors are given no training in how to supervise others, so they pattern their style on supervisors they have had and the bad judgment/behavior continues.

[Mopar151]

3. If you have little experience with respect

Fear may seem like an acceptable substitute. There are too many bullies in management - the website bullyonline.org provides a guide to determining whether you work for a leader or a bully:
How much damage is this employee doing to your business, your productivity, your profitability?

Manager Bully
Leader Bully, coward
Decisive Random, impulsive
Has a good appreciation of short, medium and long term needs, goals and strategy Rigidly short term, often no more than 24 hours
Accepts responsibility Abdicates responsibility
Shares credit Plagiarises, takes all the credit
Acknowledges failings Denies failings, always blames others
Learns from experience and applies knowledge gained from experience to improve
business, communication, language and interpersonal skills

Has a learning blindness. Self-limits, learning
only what is necessary to evade
and avoid accountability.
Inconsistent, random, impulsive
Fair, treats all equally Inconsistent, always critical, singles people out, shows favouritism
Respectful and considerate Disrespectful and inconsiderate
Seeks and retains people more knowledgeable and experienced than self Favours weaker employees, and toadying types
Values others Unable to value, constantly devalues others
Includes everyone Includes and excludes people selectively
Leads by example Dominates, sets a poor example
Truthful Economical, uses distortion and fabrication
Confident Insecure, arrogant
Behaviourally mature Behaviourally immature
Emotionally mature, high EQ (emotional intelligence) Emotionally immature, very low EQ (emotional intelligence)
Good interpersonal skills Poor interpersonal skills
Good etiquette Poor etiquette
Balanced objectivity Exclusive self-interest
Cares about staff, the business, etc Cares only about self
Respects clients Is contemptuous of clients
Gets on well with people at all levels and from all backgrounds Identifies only with clones of himself or herself
Assertive Aggressive
Delegates Dumps
Builds team spirit Divisive, uses manipulation and threat
Uses influencing skills Alienates, divides, creates fear and uncertainty
Motivates Demotivates
Listens, guides, instructs Tells
Has high expectations (that staff will do well) Has low expectations of everybody
Shares fairly Controls and subjugates
Shares information freely Withholds information, releases selectively, uses information as a weapon
Always strives for clarity Revels in confusion, divide and rule etc
Allows and trusts people to get on with the job Constantly interfering, dictating and controlling
Only addresses genuine performance issues and then focuses on performance and behaviour Makes false claims about alleged underperformance and focuses on the person, not behaviour or performance
Focused on the future Obsessed with the past
Respected Loathed
Sets a good example Sets a bad example
Has good moral code and moral integrity Amoral behaviour, no integrity
Has honesty and integrity Exhibits hypocrisy and duplicity
Rarely uses the disciplinary procedures Frequently