Wow, my roomate just pulled the drunkest moment ever

[HEyHEY]

I am sound asleep and get a phonecall, he says, "What are you doing, open the fucking door!" So, I get up and go to the door, he isn't there. I call him and hear his phone. So I hangup, I realize he's drunk as shit and at the apartment door one below ours. So I say, "Up here, fuckhead."

He's had answered the phone and thought the voice he heard was me talking over the phone to him.

"I can't it's locked, the door's locked" he says INTO THE PHONE.

"No UP HERE."

He finally looked up and started laughing... twit is lucky the apartment below is renovating and not there, they'd of called the police when they saw a 6'5 guy from Liverpool banging it down.

[havocmom]

1. LOL

Glad yer back. Missed stuff like this from you

[La Lioness Priyanka]

2. ditto

[gratuitous]

3. "Drunkest"? Wow, talk about low standards

That wouldn't even make my personal top 10, let alone crack the top 50 ever.

Pretty drunk, though.

[Duer 157099]

4. You shoulda told him to go upstairs

and get the extra key from the neighbor up there because you weren't home.

Just to fuck with him, y'know?

[driver8]

5. That reminds me of the time my drunken roommate turned down the wrong street on his bicycle.

We had ridden our bikes to the bars so we wouldn't have to drive. On the way home, my roommate turned down the wrong street. We yelled to him, and as he turned around to answer, he ran right into a couple of garbage cans. One of the funniest things I have ever seen!

[HEyHEY]

6. Oh, it gets even better, I just got home

I went out, came home and there was a puddle on the floor and a stench. I look around... the stupid, drunk, scouse, fuck SHIT on the fucking floor. I found him passed out completely nude on the couch and smacked his arse with a broom to wake him up.

"I do not recall shitting on the floor. However, if you say it wasn't you then there can be no other explaination. I must have been without boundries."

Was response to my query of how human feces ended up on my floor.

[Mojambo]

7. How could you stay mad at someone who gives such an honest, forthright, and hilarious explanation?

[HEyHEY]

8. I'm not mad, he's actually so embarrassed he asked me to stay in my room until he cleans it

[struggle4progress]

9. Years ago, I lived in an roughly Omega-shaped dorm: the building twisted and turned,

and the left side was a mirror image of the right side. Late one night I walked in, and somebody said "Your friend So-and-So is wandering around lost." I got some general location pointers and went off dutifully to find my friend So-and-So. I found friend So-and-So wandering the hall that was the mirror image of his hall: he lived on the third floor on the right side, but I found him on the third floor on the left side, almost right in front of what would have been his room if we had all gone through the Looking Glass. Despite his chemical stupor, he recognized me immediately and was quite overjoyed to learn that I actually knew how to lead him back to his room. He eventually got a doctorate and a good lab job

[HopeHoops]

10. Pretty mild actually. One of my personal favorites was walking down 4th St. naked.

Okay, I did keep my cowboy boots and cowboy hat on. It was after closing, so probably close to 3:00 a.m. and in February in N.W. PA. It was a pretty warm night - only about 5 below. I was feeling no pain. I was with my wife, another guy (who also got naked), and another woman. My wife and the other woman kept a safe distance behind us. We naked guys were singing loudly. Somehow we avoided getting arrested.

[Old Troop]

11. God does that take me back. Um actually I can't remember