I suck as a graduate student.

[Writer]

Seriously - I don't mind making mistakes, but sometimes I strike out. And that sucks.

Sometimes my work ethic isn't 100% there, so therefore, sometimes I suck.

But then again, sometimes I'm on top of my game, and I do quite well.

But sometimes I wonder why I'm doing all of this when, sometimes, I suck pretty hard. And that my professors and classmates notice that I suck pretty hard.

Sucking hard SUCKS when you're a graduate student, especially when you're in your 30's, because everyone expects you not to suck at that age.

Nonetheless, my age doesn't preclude me from sucking.

And sucked today I did.


~Writer, Who Sucks~

[XemaSab]

1. I suck at life

I got 70% on my last assignment for an online class I'm taking. I can't get the damn program to open so I can get my midterm for the class, which is due tomorrow.

I missed a meeting this morning for work because I misread the time as 10:30, but it was really 8:30. I also fucked up on checking out the documents properly, so other people have worked on the same documents. It's all due tomorrow, which I only found out about this morning, so I am scrambling to get this last document in order.

I'm about ready to go back to bed. x(

[Writer]

2. Oh heavens, here's a hug for you!

I think I'm going to hide in the bathroom for a while myself.

[XemaSab]

24. Thanks

I am drinking wine now. :D

[Bucky]

3. You don't suck at verbal self abuse, if that's any consolation.

You beat yourself up real good.

[zanana1]

6. That's for sure.

I only took night courses in my 30's and my brain was so lazy by years of not studying, I had to study constantly to get a decent grade. You're taking graduate courses, and they're no piece of cake. Give yourself a break, will ya?

[Darth_Kitten]

4. It's temporary......

For what it's worth, I take evening classes. For a long time, I think my heart wasn't in it, I wasn't giving it my best effort, and then suddenly last week something "clicked".

:)


Give yourself a pat on the back....you'll be okay. :)

[Writer]

5. Thanks, Darth.

I am getting very close to pulling a Joaquin Phoenix. Show up to class drunk or high, with a beard and glasses, somewhat incoherent... which would be especially weird, because I'm a woman.

[bluedigger]

13. Just the beard then.

Men don't make passes, etc...

:rofl: :hug:

[petronius]

7. If grad school doesn't suck the life out of you and destroy your self-esteem,

then you're doing it wrong. :)

I pulled some epic idiocies back when I was a grad student, and I occasionally do them now that I'm a faculty member too - it's an agonizing feeling, but keep in mind that it happens to everyone and doesn't reflect on your actual ability. Just power through to the weekend and forget about the sucky days (they won't appear on your diploma anyway)...

[Writer]

9. Hehe, thanks.

I had a very difficult semester last fall, and although it ended well, it drained me of almost all of my mental energy. This semester hasn't been nearly as demanding, so I've been taking it easy. I keep asking myself if I should be working harder, and I guess I could always be working harder, but I have two conferences this semester and am doing an extra independent research project on top of my work load.

I just hope that, when I do bone-headed presentations like I did this morning, that my prof's are understanding.

[petronius]

11. That's a dangerous trap. You will know, with absolute certainty, when

you aren't working hard enough. If you only think that maybe you're not working hard enough, then you actually are. Spring semesters/quarters always seem tougher to me too; so much energy gets expended in fall and winter break just isn't enough recharge...

I'm sure your profs understand. They're typically amused by a major implosion, but they'll recognize it for the blip that it is. :)

[Writer]

12. I appreciate the wisdom, thanks. n/t

[petronius]

15. Wisdom!? Whoah, let's not get carried away...

:)

[Writer]

16. Okay... thank you for your suggestions as garnered through your life experience.

A deconstructed thanks.

[petronius]

22. Now that's a die-hard grad student! A natural instinct to deconstruct anything that can be!

Expressing pleasure at the notion my comments served a utilitarian purpose, and reaffirming willingness to repeat aforementioned hermeneutic exercise. (A deconstructed "Any time! :) ")

[Midlodemocrat]

8. You don't suck. Everyone has ups and downs in grad school.

Ebbs and flows, like marriage.

Just continuing to pursue this means you don't suck.

[Writer]

10. Thank you, Midlo.

Life sure is ducky when it's not sucky.

[Barack_America]

14. Oh honey, I do too.

:hug:

[Writer]

18. Awwww. Thanks for the hug.

Isn't it great that we can all suck together?

[The Velveteen Ocelot]

17. I didn't suck particularly as a graduate student but

in ensuing years I began sucking more and more, until I have now reached the point where I suck hard enough to bend light.

[Writer]

19. That's a lot of sucking.

I'm very sorry.

What's going on?

[The Velveteen Ocelot]

21. Nothing in particular.

I just suck. But I'm OK with it.

[many a good man]

20. You can't be a good writer unless you SUCK sometimes

I'd say you are straight on your way to greatness! Chin up!

[GreenPartyVoter]

23. *hugs*

[triguy46]

25. Our son is experiencing some suckiness right now...

in his doctoral program. I asked a professor friend about it who said that it just happens, to keep plugging away. Most important, however, to continue to work hard and demonstrate the effort.