Personality changes with alcohol

[Juche]

I don't know if this thread will turn out bad or not, but I am curious as to other people's input.

I drink maybe 1-2x a month. For the last 10 years, whenever I'd drink I was a 'happy drunk' in the sense that everything was funny, I was euphoric, art and music were more enjoyable, etc.

However in the last few months drinking has turned me into an angry drunk. Its gotten to the point where I don't even do it anymore because I have so much rage inside of me that comes out when drunk (I don't direct it at anyone, but I feel tons of rage), but goes away when sober. I got moderately drunk today and realized this isn't enjoyable due to the anger. Last time I drank was almost 2 months ago, and the same thing happened. I'd say in the last 5-6 months I made the transition from happy drunk to angry drunk.

I don't know if this is psychological or biological. Has anyone done studies on this subject (biological vs psychological reactions to alcohol)?

If it is psychological (ie I have repressed rage), I'd like to know so I can get into treatment. But I don't get why I'd have rage now if alcohol just made me silly up until a few months ago. Really bad stuff has happened to me in my life, but I'm not sure why it would make me angry now but not the last 10 years.

Ironically I am actually a lot less angry when sober now than I was about 7-8 years ago. I worked through most of my anger I used to have. However even back then (back when I was a much more angry person) alcohol just made me a happy drunk. Now that I have less anger when I'm sober, I'm an angry drunk. I don't know what is going on or if it is biological or psychological. Because most of the anger has been gone for several years.

I've 'heard' it might actually be an allergic reaction to alcohol. Not sure, but it is something to look into. Maybe I'm having an allergic reaction.

This sucks. I know alcohol is 'bad' and all, but it was really fun to use recreationally every now and again when watching movies or playing games. Now I can't do it anymore.

[LeftyFingerPop]

1. This is a very interesting question.

From my obviously "non-professional" perspective, I would consider the following variables. In any case, it is something worth talking to your doctor about.

1) Are you taking any medications that may be causing a different reaction to alcohol?

2) Have you been showing any signs of depression or any other mental changes? Could you possibly be drinking to self-medicate?

3) Have you shown signs of any worrisome physical changes?

4) Have you changed the type of alcohol that you drink (for example...from beer to hard liquor)?

Please talk to your doctor, and good luck to you.

[redqueen]

2. You said you worked through most of the anger...

does that mean that there's more stuff that you haven't dealt with yet? If so, it might be related to that, and therefore psychological.

I hardly ever drink anymore but when I did, I could be a happy drunk or an angry drunk, and oddly enough, it seemed to depend on what I was drinking.

[Juche]

5. I just don't know why it'd happen now

If it is strictly psychological, why happen now and not years ago? Why start a few months ago?

I am thinking it might be stress related in some way. I should see a therapist for that. In the last year I was laid off from my first job out of college. I found out a girl I loved in college got married and I had to let her go. I traveled and opened my horizons to the concept of moving away. I got caught in a situation between my brother and his (abusive) girlfriend.

I think it might just be tons of stress hitting me at once. If so, laying off the alcohol and seeing a counselor is a good idea.

[redqueen]

6. Agreed on all points.

Good luck, and take care of yourself. :hug:

[rcrush]

3. I cant really get drunk anymore.

If I have more than 2 beers I'll probably throw up. I don't go drinking with my roommate anymore because he likes to punch stuff when he gets drunk. That usually only happens when he hits the hard liquor so he stopped doing that.

Alcohol usually brings out dickish behavior in my experience.


But I do notice more violent tendencies when people drink the hard liquor as opposed to beer.

[Swede]

4. I never hold what someone says or does while loaded against them.

It's called impaired for a reason.

[Quantess]

7. Allergic reaction to alcohol?

What are the symptoms of that? And if so, why would it start so late in your drinking career?

And another thing, have you considered that you actually still have a lot of suppressed anger or resentment that is muted, until you drink?

[Juche]

8. Possibly

I'm just confused as to why it would come out in the last few months. Why wouldn't it have come out in spring of 2009? This anger seems to have started in fall of 2009. When I drank in summer of 2009 I was a happy drunk.

I think it might be stress related.

[Quantess]

9. If you can remember what you get angry about when drinking,

and what triggers the anger, I think you'll find answers.

[Courtesy Flush]

10. I recently stopped drinking for similar reasons.

For decades I have not had any problems in my life. Honestly... good marriage. Good health. Adequate income, and no debt.

Despite this, I drank like a fish for years. But in recent months, and for the first time in my adult life, I have big problems. Namely, a person who was very dear to me committed suicide because of something I had done, and shortly afterward I learned that my wife is terminally ill. I kept drinking as usual, but with new consequences. Now alcohol makes me so depressed, I can't stop crying. My wife says she can't watch me do this to myself, so I quit a week before Christmas.

I still cry almost daily, but less often, and usually briefly.

Funny how the same substance can have such varying effects.

[hippywife]

11. Intoxicants usually seem to only

amplify one's personality or even mood. If I'm already in a bad mood, catching a buzz doesn't change that it merely makes it worse.

[Forkboy]

12. I only drink 4 or 5 times a year, but I used to drink a lot in my teens and early 20's (I'm 42 now).

I'm still a happy drunk on the times I do drink, and like you I find music more enjoyable, but I just can't do it much anymore because of the meds I'm on (ever since I had my thyroid removed drinking wipes me out the next day...not nauseous, no headache, just full body exhaustion).

I have a friend who drinks often, though he's recently cut down a lot, and he's also a happy drunk.

But I think the term happy drunk is deceiving. More often than not we're happy when we drink because we're not happy when we're sober, so the happiness while drinking is just an temporary illusion. It's possible that you didn't work through your anger issues as much as you initially thought. It could also be just an allergic reaction. It could also just be generalized anger at the situation we find ourselves in as a country, or even as a species (I have that one big time!). Either way, if it's making you feel as angry as you say it is it would be wise to avoid it until you find out what's causing it.

[Sky Masterson]

22. +1

"But I think the term happy drunk is deceiving"
It is! I can be the most jovial person on the planet while drunk, but it isn't real.
It's only an illusion of happiness.
I'm ashamed to say how much wine and beer I downed (by myself) just sitting here
on DU surfing over the years.
I stopped that a few months ago when it dawned on me that all I was doing was fooling myself and packing on excess weight that made me even more self-conscious and unhappy.

[Drunken Irishman]

13. I don't even know what my sober personality is like. Haven't seen that Sean in years.

[Bucky]

14. Wow, that's weird. I can't imagine being angry while drinking.

If I'm angry I guess I don't feel like drinking.

I mean, take the doctor's advice from that joke: then don't do that. But more importantly be grateful that you've put it together so clearly and do something about it. Seek a therapist or a minister or someone and find out what's ticking you off so much. You've got a box in there that needs to be unlocked. Good luck with that.

[undeterred]

15. Just a guess

Since alcohol is known to reduce inhibitions, I think it exposes whatever that person is feeling at the time. I don't think that certain people are funny when drunk, others horny, others angry. I think that being drunk makes someone drop the mask and let out whatever feelings they are holding back at that time. I guess that's how I make sense of the behavior of a person I've seen behave very differently when drunk on different occasions.

[liberaltrucker]

16. Time to quit IMHO

For the last 10 years, whenever I'd drink I was a 'happy drunk' in the sense that everything was funny, I was euphoric, art and music were more enjoyable, etc.

<snip>

However in the last few months drinking has turned me into an angry drunk.

<snip>

Jump on the wagon and NEVER fall off.

Oh, and seek counseling NOW.

Good luck.

:hug:

[Lil Missy]

17. Is this a drink or two each time? Or drinking till intoxicated?

[Juche]

18. Normally I drink whiskey out of a sippy cup while gently sobbing

Then I pass out.

[Redstone]

19. Bingo: You "can't do it anymore." Not fun to face, but the truth.

Redstone

[applegrove]

20. I've always been a happy drunk like you were in the start. Then I was traumatized and

remained a happy drunk but I was a binge drinker as I tried to cope with PTSD. It led to laxidaisical behaviour on my part and serious mistakes. The definition for alcoholism for me is "alcohol is causing serious issues in your life yet you keep drinking". I fit that definition. So I stopped for 4 years. I started drinking moderately again for two years. But I went into PTSD adrenalin attacks, lost a ton of weight and started to binge drink again to cope. So I quit. Been quit for 3 years.

I would still be a happy drunk. But alcohol is not for me with PTSD. I'm too desperate to take a load off and have an alternative life (my life for the last 15 years has been pretty horrific in terms of what I have had to put up with and what I've remembered)that I binge.

I would definitely quit if you are unhappy. Try and find out what the rage is from and deal with it. Then try again. And remember as long as drinking can potentially cause serious problems in your life you have to be able to quit.

[Rhiannon12866]

21. You might want to consider AA. That's what I did.

I drank when I was unhappy and it made me feel better, or at least feel less. And it began to take more and more...

I finally accepted that this thing was getting out of control, so I went to an AA meeting. My friend agreed to go with me. I've been going to meetings regularly for over a year and have been sober for nine months. I can't say, yet, that it's made me feel "happy, joyous and free," as they say, but I get a lot out of it. And it's a lot more than just not drinking alcohol, but learning to live life in a more constructive way, "life on life's terms," as they say.

Everybody has a story and they're all different, but all the same. Alcohol began causing problems... And those in AA often say that they're "allergic" to alcohol. That's what caught my attention about your post. They can't drink like other people can. I learn something new at every meeting, often unrelated to alcohol, acceptance, how to handle grief, how to deal with the problems of day-to-day living.

I recommend giving AA a try, if you're interested. I've also met a lot of really nice people and have a whole new network of friends. And it doesn't matter if you're not religious. I'm not, but that's okay. It's a spiritual, not a religious, program. And they say "take what you want and leave the rest..." :hi: