Rhapsody counts down "Music's Greatest Turkeys...the 10 most disastrous, ill-conceived albums"

[Amerigo Vespucci]

Gobble Gobble

As you carve your Thanksgiving bird, join us as we count down the 10 most disastrous, ill-conceived, just plain awful albums ever.

http://www.rhapsody.com/gallery/image?galleryId=31054050&imageId=31054054&pageid=rotw.homepage-returning-user&pageregion=B4

2. Guns N' Roses: Chinese Democracy

Never in the history of popular music has the sheer calamity of a single album been so universally agreed upon. This one was a no-brainer: Ten years, millions of dollars, 4,700 band members and a guy named Bumblefoot in the making, Axl Rose's piece de resistance turned out to be a different kind of piece altogether, a miasma of the once-great GN'FN'R vocalist's hopes, dreams, fears and third grade vocabulary. .



7. Bob Dylan: Self-Portait

"What is this sh*t?" Greil Marcus famously asked in his Rolling Stone review of Bob Dylan's 1970 album Self-Portrait. After changing the world in the '60s, Dylan kicked off the '70s with a breezy, half-assed album of tepid covers and throw-away country ballads. It was as if he was dismantling his legend, one note at a time. When asked by Rolling Stone years later why he had made Self Portrait a double album, Dylan replied, "If you're gonna put a lot of crap on it, you might as well load it up!"

[fishwax]

1. Self Portrait is actually a good album, but the rest aren't easy to argue with

The Bob Dylan/Bob Dylan duet on The Boxer is great stuff.

I'll also admit that Pop has actually grown on me since it came out.

Looks to me like the list only has nine titles -- so for the sake of argument, what would you add as the tenth?

[Amerigo Vespucci]

2. The Poco "original members" reunion album, "Legacy" (1989)

On paper, it sounded like a good idea...Richie Furay, Jim Messina, Randy Meisner, Rusty Young, George Grantham...the original members.

Then they involved MTV hack Richard Marx and it was like peeing in the pool.

There is one good, solid song..."Call It Love"...which remains a concert staple to this day.

Poco is now basically Paul Cotton and Rusty Young and other guys, but they do a much better job with the band that the "originals" did on this really, really, REALLY BAD album. Weak, just weak.

[fishwax]

5. oh, that sounds truly horrible

I've never heard it, but it's hard to imagine Richard Marx *not* peeing in that pool.

[enigmatic]

28. I always loved "The Blue And The Gray"

Very underrated record, and about 10 years ahead of it's time; I could see this parked beside Uncle Tupelo's Anodyne" and The Jayhawks' Hollywood Town Hall". Some of Paul Cotton's best songs here, too..

[Amerigo Vespucci]

35. Absolutely, a "lost classic."

One of the things that pissed me off about that "reunion" album is that they were mouthing off about how "THIS is Poco, we're not going to record anymore unless it's with THIS lineup, because THIS is the REAL band..."

Paul Cotton deserves as much credit as ANY other band member for the group's legacy, and his songs were always the "magnet" that kept bringing me back to the band. Rusty Young's songs as well...that's why having the two of them in the current edition makes it a strong lineup.

"Blue and Grey" works as an ALBUM...from start to finish, there are no "groaners," no tracks to skip.

:toast:

[begin_within]

3. I don't think "Goat's Head Soup" is that bad.

Far from the Stones' best, but still a few good songs on it. They could have picked from many worse albums across the rock spectrum.

[Tabasco_Dave]

4. I agree

Goat's head soup was a grade C album, if you want to pick a bad album from a great band, Led Zeppelin's Coda, is the all time stinker.

[begin_within]

7. I actually bought Coda,

but just so I could say I have a complete LZ collection on vinyl. (However I still don't have LZ III, the one with the thing that turns anyway). I think I got it as a cut-out and probably paid between $3 and $4 for it. But I've never actually played it, except maybe one song, Darlene I think. I only bought it for the sake of completeness and I suspect that's the reason for 99% of its sales...

[Amerigo Vespucci]

13. You're right, it's "Odds & Sods" (except The Who's "Odds & Sods" is actually a good album)

The "Coda" stuff...and the "extras" from the two box sets that eventually ended up on the "expanded" CD version of that album...were a concession by Jimmy Page to gather up every single sweeping from the cutting room floor.

If you're a musician and your fans are screaming for this stuff, what are you gonna do?

My "essential" Led Zep collection consists of Physical Graffiti...which I've always felt was their best single album...and one single 80-minute mix CD that I made from all of their other albums.

Nothing from "Coda" made it onto the mix CD...not a single track.

:toast:

[bluesbassman]

24. Well, the CD version did contain "Hey, Hey What Can I Do",

which I felt should have been included on LZ III.

[Amerigo Vespucci]

6. I agreed with Rolling Stone's review of the album and their take on "Winter"...

...in the early stages of Them, Van Morrison frequently channeled Jagger (I see no difference whatsoever between "Gloria" and "Get Off Of My Cloud"...it is the same song), so on "Winter," it all came full circle. It's Jagger channeling "St. Dominick's Preview"-era Morrison, to be sure, but I still think it's a beautiful song, with a mix of strings and guitar solos reminiscent of "Sway" from "Sticky Fingers"...really representative of the Mick Taylor era.

"Silver Train"...written (supposedly) for Johnny Winter, and I'm not sure if his version is better or not. It's "another version."

I've never been a fan of "Angie"...

...but I love "Star Star," because it's the whole Stones / Chuck Berry thing taken to its most ridiculous extremes.

Maybe "Goats Head Soup" would have been seen in a different light if it didn't follow "Exile On Main Street."

But I agree...I was somewhat surprised to see it on that list.

:toast:

[begin_within]

9. I confess

I actually like "Angie" but mainly for the wistful mood and sound, not for the melodrama.

[Amerigo Vespucci]

15. I hear ya, it was the melodrama that tuned me out.

Whatever Mick, and Bowie, and Bowie's wife did in the privacy of their rock star mansions and / or hotel rooms is of no interest to me.

The song opened the door to two tracks on "Black and Blue"..."Memory Motel" and "Fool To Cry"...which many critics also rip, and they are not my favorite Stones songs, but I prefer them to "Angie"...even though they are cut from EXACTLY the same kind of cloth.

:toast:

[Sebastian Doyle]

14. Winter was probably the oldest song on "Goats Head Soup"

It started out as a song called "Blood Red Wine" back in 1968. You can hear the original on any number of Stones bootlegs. Musically it's about the same, but Mick's lyric and vocal are essentially a bunch of really stoned babbling. But the lines about snow lying heavy on the ground and wanting to wrap a coat around you are in there somewhere.

Goats Head Soup really wasn't that bad of an album, but it was literally the songs that missed the cut on Sticky Fingers and Exile (and Beggars Banquet, in the case of the previously mentioned "Winter".)

Now "Pop" on the other hand, remains U2's greatest "what the fuck" moment.

[mitchum]

37. I think GHS must be on the list only because it came at the end...

of an incredible period of creativity. More so a disappointment rather than a terrible record?
There are far worse albums. Hell, there are far worse Rolling Stones albums. By this point in time...lots of them.

"Winter" is beautiful.

[Iggo]

16. Angie and Heartbreaker are two of my favorite Stones songs.

:shrug:

[begin_within]

33. I think "Heartbreaker" has one of their best intros.

"It's All Over Now" and "Time is On My Side" probably the only rivals to "Heartbreaker"

[hippywife]

32. True. If they wanted to stay with the Stones

which I suspect they really wanted to, I would have picked Undercover Angel. :hi:

[Amerigo Vespucci]

38. I'd pick "Dirty Work" over "Undercover" as their worst...

I just made a mix CD last week of favorite tracks from "Some Girls" through "A Bigger Bang," basically the Ron Wood years. I pulled a minimum of one track from each of the studio albums in that period EXCEPT for "Dirty Work." I don't think it has a single strong track on it, including the "hit" cover of "Harlem Shuffle," which is lifeless at best.

"Dirty Work" came at the peak of Mick & Keith's bickering, each trying to outdo the other with solo projects, and reluctantly coming to the conclusion that on their own, neither would ever top the Stones. Reviewers have made interesting comments on the cover, specifically Keith dead-center in the photo with Jagger off to the side, as if to assert his leadership:



"Undercover" has "Pretty Beat Up," which Ron Wood's done a better job of in his solo concerts (Bernard Fowler handling the vocals). The title track, while certainly not one of their best, has a degree of guitar riff charm as well.

Then there's "Metamorphosis," the "scraps" album, which in the context of the "ill-conceived" theme in the original list, probably is the "worst" Stones album:



From Wikipedia: "Metamorphosis is the third compilation album of Rolling Stones music released by former manager Allen Klein's ABKCO Records (who usurped control of the band's Decca/London material in 1970) after the band's departure from Decca and Klein. Released in 1975, Metamorphosis centers on outtakes and alternate versions of well-known songs recorded from 1964 to 1970." http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Metamorphosis_%28The_Rolling_Stones_album%29

:toast:

[Archae]

8. This one should have been #3. Or #2, since it was nothing but shit.

[Amerigo Vespucci]

10. Steve Miller jumped the shark when he ripped off "Rocky Mountain Way"

"The Stake"...Miller KNEW that he was ripping off Joe Walsh, KNEW that anyone with EARS would know it too, and just...didn't...CARE.

I like the original "Steve Miller Band" stuff...with Boz Scaggs...but from "The Joker" to the present, he can BITE me. It's the worst kind of "FM Radio-friendly" pop PAP on the planet.

:toast:

[Archae]

11. Yup.

Climaxing with the worst of the worst, "Rockin' Me Baby."
Just how shitfaced drunk was Steve Miller when he concocted that mess?

[Amerigo Vespucci]

17. "Abra, abra cadabra...I'm gonna reach out and grab ya."

If I were Miller's manager, I would have gone at him with a sock filled with quarters over THAT one.

:rofl:

[Capn Sunshine]

22. aaaargh

make it stop! The pain!
What's Ironic is that "Children of the Future" was so stellar
Steppin' Stone

[radiclib]

25. Oh yes, Mr. Scaggs!

He's still the Boz http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iqWzWJEORj0&feature=related

[Sebastian Doyle]

19. Yeah, that was a blatant clone

But he really jumped the shark with that Abracadbra shit. I don't think Steve's career ever recovered from that fiasco.

[Amerigo Vespucci]

21. It didn't...it all came down to endless repackaging of "the hits" after that...

...and he never had ANOTHER hit AFTER it.

I remember the "Anniversary Edition" or whatever the hell it was of "Fly Like An Eagle" a couple of years ago, packaged with a "bonus" DVD of modern-dal Miller limping through "the hits."

I could smell the flop sweat rising off of that one a mile away.

[Archae]

23. The worst part?

Steve Miller has lots of fans.
Even for his absolute shit.

He had a concert in Milwaukee recently, and it sold out pretty quick.

[Capn Sunshine]

12. I'm thinking "Mr. Bat Sings" is pretty bad

but that's a whole other animal

[Amerigo Vespucci]

18. What the hell is THAT? John Wayne Gacy?

:rofl:

[Capn Sunshine]

20. worse.

AFAIK , Mr. Bat is still free

[Amerigo Vespucci]

36. I found a "where is he now" link...

http://iddybud.blogspot.com/2005_03_04_archive.html#110995414635900464

Mr. Bat, also known as Bruce A. Tweten

Discography: "Mr. Bat Sings", 1960s LP. Mrs. L. E. Tweten, accompanist. Bruce dresses as a clown and sings.

WHERE IS HE NOW?

The artist formerly known as "Mr. Bat" is currently performing as a circus clown named "Mr. Moth", whose gimmick is to dress up to look like a classical singer. Mrs. Tweten accompanies him on the rubber fart horn, which is honked flatulently whenever he amazingly hits a high "C".

[enigmatic]

29. Oh man, I NEED a copy of this!

Seriously, I want to play this on my show; do you know if any mp3's are floating around anywhere of this?

[EastTennesseeDem]

26. I freaking love Terror Twilight

Essential listening, IMHO.

[enigmatic]

27. "Self-Portrait" doesn't belong on this

If only for "Copper Kettle" and his version of "Folsom Prision Blues". On the other hand, where the hell is Vanilla Fudge's "The Beat Goes On"? Acto their money at them and Shadow Morton after "You Keep Me Hanging On" and came back w/ their magnum opus, a history of 20th century music, done w/ help of massive, massive drugs. At the time is was a universally panned flop, but I'm perverse enough to have fallen in love with it the moment I heard "Voices In Time" the first time on my brother's stereo..

[old mark]

30. They left out most of Rod Stewart's entire career - some very lame shit

after a promising beginning.

But what the hell, he got rich.
mark

[kentauros]

31. It's a good thing I don't listen to any of those bands.

That way, I avoided the pain y'all had to go through :P

[rocktivity]

34. The real tragedy of Chinese Democracy is that is became such a symbol of GNR's decline and fall

The fact that its release took so long became an understatement in itself. As a music journalist, I wrote that "we're going to see democracy in China BEFORE we see Chinese Democracy."

:headbang:
rocktivity