THE. WORST. Stuffing/dressing* EVAR.

[trof]

We invited 3 couples for Thanksgiving.
We did the turkey and a few other things.
They brought the sides.

The dressing was abominable.
It appeared to be one package of Pepperidge Farms Stuffing Mix very lightly moistened with god knows what and 'warmed'
It was a bowl of dampish bread cubes.
:puke:

I really like dressing.
Miz t. makes EXCELLENT dressing.
Now I want some.
She promised to make me some tomorrow.

Me: "NEVER let Jean make the dressing again."
Miz t.: "Don't worry. I won't. That was CRAP!"
Miz t. calls 'em like she sees 'em.
:-)

*If it's actually IN the turkey, I call it 'stuffing'.
If it's a side casserole I call it 'dressing'.
So sue me.

[The Velveteen Ocelot]

1. That bread cube stuffing/dressing is awful, and it's hard to avoid.

Strangely, a lot of people think it's actually edible. The other thing I totally hate about Thanksgiving is sweetened sweet potatoes with melted marshmallows on top. Just got back from dinner with my brother and his family. My SIL always makes that sweet potato goo, but this year the marshmallows CAUGHT FIRE under the broiler, and as they were trying to get the flaming goo out of the oven and put out the fire, some of the sweet potatoes splattered on the floor and there was a sticky mess and everybody was yelling.

I tend to find kitchen disasters amusing as long as nobody gets hurt and nothing significant catches fire, so I was sort of laughing at the whole mess, and I took a picture of the charred marshmallow/sweet potato glop with my cell phone. My SIL told me I was being rude. She takes that sort of thing very seriously; I don't. They salvaged most of the goo and actually ate it. I stuck to turkey and wild rice. There was also some bread stuffing. I didn't eat that.

[Manifestor_of_Light]

6. you wouldn'tlike my dinner.

I use pepperidge farm crumbs but I put a lot of other stuff in it to make it taste good.

And I make sweet potatoes with oranges and pineapple in them, and marshmallows on top.

[The Velveteen Ocelot]

15. Bread stuffing is OK if you do something with it.

But when you just take it out of the box, stick it in the turkey and call it done -- blech. And the sweet potato goo I'm referring to has nothing but sweet potatoes and brown sugar and marshmallows -- it's wayyyy too sweet. The oranges and pineapples sound like a huge improvement (but I basically don't like sweet potatoes much anyhow).

[tigereye]

10. one year we almost dropped the turkey as it was coming out of the oven

there was a lot of swearing and flying oil. It was kind of funny in retrospect. You just have to laugh at that kind of thing, I think.

[trof]

14. We use Pepperidge Farm or Stove-top and like it.

But Miz t. puts onions, celery, herbs, etc. in it with plenty of chicken broth. It's kinda casserole consistency when done. Sometimes she makes patties of it and sautees them, calls those 'rissoles'.

The 'stuff' our friend brought had no cohesion and less flavor.
Not near enough liquid in it.
blech

[blueamy66]

17. Yep, didn't want to mess with stuffing this year...

so I bought Stove Top and added sauteed celery and onions and cranberries.

Surprisingly, it turned out very good!

[badgerpup]

21. You've GOT to have a minor disaster...

...it sort of bleeds off cosmic pressure (think pressure cooker).

If you don't have a minor-ish disaster every year, it builds up and then something HORRIBLE happens.

At least, that's what I think...:silly:

[trof]

35. Sort of advance, precautionary karma?

I like it.
:-)

[trof]

29. The sweet potato marshmallow goo is like serving dessert WITH the meal.

yuck

[The Velveteen Ocelot]

31. It is vastly improved by catching on fire.

[trof]

37. Ah...Candied Yams Flambe'.

Yes.

[Berry Cool]

47. It didn't occur to them to just close the oven door on the fire, did it?

That happened one year with my family. Yes, we always make the sweet potatoes with the marshmallows--sorry, we love 'em. So, one year they catch fire, and what are two of my sisters doing but standing in front of the open oven door screaming hysterically "THE SWEET POTATOES ARE ON FIRE!"

I said "Turn it off and shut the oven door!" They did. The fire went out. Lack of oxygen will do that to a fire, so I had recalled.

It seems to me that some of the largest and most damaging fires are caused by people confronted with a very tiny fire whose first notion is "I have to take this someplace else while it's engulfed in flames where I can do something to put it out! Oh, and then I'll have to put out the flames still in the place I took it from! Oh, and the flames caused by the embers that dropped as I carried it..."

[madamesilverspurs]

2. Wellllllllll....

An old boyfriend suggested popcorn stuffing. Dump a bag of popping corn into the turkey and sew it shut. Put the turkey in the oven. Dinner is ready when the ass blows out of the turkey.


--

[gmoney]

3. you'll be hearing from my attorneys

this shall not stand

[seabeyond]

4. ha... used stove top and added celery, onion and sage. lol. not moms, but works. nt

[Manifestor_of_Light]

12. stove top is gross.

[blueamy66]

18. we think alike

:)

[BadGimp]

5. I paid $50 at a local eatery for NO BROWN GRAVY!!!!

IS THERE A GOD ANYMORE??

They had this so so white flour giblet gravy that has turned to spackle in my tummy...ouch.

I waited all year for that?

Today it suct to be me.

But at least I had a great meal with a great friend and I have my health. I am thankful. But darnit still I want some stuffing with greasy brown gravy.

[blueamy66]

19. We cooked a turkey breast

that came with a packet of brown gravy.

It was the best gravy I've ever "made".

[trof]

28. Miz t. won't touch the plastic packet.

I dunno.
It's a 'matter of principle' with her.
"I don't know what's IN that stuff."
:shrug:

[fizzgig]

7. that's what we have every year

i made stuffing from scratch the first thanksgiving i handled everything and, after the meal, my dad told me i should get his mother's recipe because it was his favorite stuffing. turns out it was the pepperidge farms stuff.

it's no skin off my nose, though. i don't eat it and it makes less work for me.

[Chan790]

8. I've got to make myself some tomorrow.

It's hard to have a happy veg*n-friendly Thanksgiving when you don't control the menu. My roommate and his family tried though, they forewent the marshmallows on the sweet potatoes just for me and didn't bacon the salad. However, they draw the line at not putting oysters in the dressing...it's a Chesapeake Bay thing or so they claim. :eyes:

So...tomorrow...me, a pint of veggie-stock, cubed stale sourdough, celery, carrots, some soysage, myriad spices and a dutch-oven are getting real cozy.

[tigereye]

9. my mom made a very crackly white bread stuffing fried to a crisp when I was

a kid.

I hated it.

So now I make a very moist chestnut-french bread-apple dressing. Kind of rich and a bit of work, but wonderful. We've been very lucky that we seem to be able to pick pretty edible recipes... My husband made a great cranberry = apple- pineapple relish with brown sugar. It was so good!

[The empressof all]

11. Next time suggest White Castle Stuffing

Ingredients

* 10 miniature fast food hamburgers without pickles
* 1 1/2 cups chopped celery
* 1 1/4 teaspoons ground thyme
* 1 1/2 teaspoons ground sage
* 3/4 teaspoon ground black pepper
* 1/4 cup chicken broth

Directions

1. Tear the small hamburgers in to small pieces, and place in a large bowl. Toss with celery, thyme, sage, and pepper. Pour in the chicken broth while stirring to moisten the stuffing. Stuff into the cavity of a turkey just before roasting. This makes enough to stuff a 10 to 12 pound bird.

http://allrecipes.com/recipe/white-castle-turkey-dressing/Detail.aspx

[WCGreen]

16. Slider Stuffing...

[grasswire]

36. have you eaten this???

It made me laugh.

I wonder what other recipes could be made with frozen fast food items.

Fish sticks...?

We may need a new thread in C&B

[trof]

41. Gotta try that.

That and a salad would make a meal.
Thanks.

[astral]

13. Well that's one thing I miss is my mom and dad's stuffing.

Regular bag of store-bought croutons, lotsa sage, some poultry seasoning, salt, an egg, little water, and chopped up celery and onion with RAISINS AND PRUNES added.

That's it... oh, some black pepper and B U T T E R.

It goes """" IN"""" the bird, and what doesn't fit goes around the bird or wherever, but it goes IN the bird, THAT is --- well, in my world, "DRESSING."

Dressing the bird.

And the next day: cast-iron frying pan, some extra chopped raw onions, and some pieces of turkey, globs of stuffing, and sweet potatoes (this is the only circumstance I actually LIKE sweet potatoes -- other wise I tolerate them if I'm hungry enough.)

FRY IT UP. Put it on your plate. Add some hot gravy.

Possibly the best food in the whole entire universe. It's called turkey hash!~

Better than the Thanksgiving Day turkey dinner.

But that's just me . . . .

MUST be a nice weathered cast-iron pan to really be perfect. Regular potatoes can be added, but please not too much.

[blueamy66]

20. Thanks for the awesome recipe astral

I will be trying this later.

[Lars39]

22. Having just eaten some of my MILs cornbread stuffing...

I feel sorry for your tastebuds, trof. Not sure I'd let that guest make *anything* next year. :)

[trof]

40. Her pecan pie was great.

But, yeah.
No dressing from her again.

[LiberalEsto]

23. I used Pepperidge Farm as a base yesterday

But jazzed it up a bit. I sauteed diced celery and diced apples in olive oil (no onions because they don't sit well with me). Then I added a half cup of "Craisins" dried sweetened cranberries.
Finally I put in a cup and a half of boiled, peeled chopped chestnuts and moistened the mix with fat-free chicken broth. I can't remember how long I baked it, because I was trying to do about 15 things at once.
It was really good. My daughter said it was the best I'd ever made.

[Manifestor_of_Light]

24. I add lotsa stuff to the Pepperidge Farm too

3 bags of pepperidge farm stuffing mix - 2 herb, 1 cornbread
6 hardboiled eggs, diced
2 medium onions, chopped diced and sauteed in butter until brown
2 sticks real butter, salted, melted
1 large can mushrooms
4 cans low salt chicken broth
A gob of poultry seasoning
A gob of sage

Bake in large dutch oven with lid off until brown on top.

Yummy.

[Sheltiemama]

25. I made homemade cornbread dressing.

I can do without the turkey, as long as I have my mother's dressing.

[unpossibles]

26. I went to a friend's parents for Thanksgiving a couple of years back

no one told me they were Atkins diet people, and since I am a vegetarian who doesn't ever make waves, I'm glad I always bring something or I'd have been screwed.

They had no breads, no potatoes, and everything had meat in it, or was just straight up meat. I did not say anything about it, and luckily one of my other friends brought a veggie-friendly dish too. Regardless of all of that, who the hell doesn't eat potatoes of some sort on Thanksgiving? Is that even legal to do? Seriously.

To add insult to injury, I had brought three bottles of wine, one of which was a decent mid-range Spanish red wine, and the hostess made fun of me because it was not whatever fancy crap they usually drink, which honestly wasn't anything special in my opinion. I am no wine snob, but having worked in some nice restaurants and bakeries, I've had some really good wines, and their bottle wasn't anything more special or even expensive than the ones I bought. Yeah, fuck that. I still did not say anything.

Finally, one of the hosts started arguing about global warming to my friend who came, who just happens to be an oceanographic geologist who knows a LOT of people in the related fields, and despite her credentials and complete knowledge of the subject, they refused to give up their Rush Limbaugh BS. Suddenly it made sense: we were dining with them! Looking around, I saw several conservative books on their shelves too.

I would not have cared, nor even thought of the political side of it, nor would I be so rude as to argue about that crap at Thanksgiving, and of course they were totally rude asshats to me and several of my friends. fail.



Anyway, this year was fantastic. I went to Philly to visit with old friends, and even got to see people I had not seen in decades. Sorry about your stuffing nightmare!

[trof]

27. Talked to Jean the 'bad dressing maker' this morning.

She's in our 'Morning 3 Mile Walk' bunch.
I complimented her on her pecan pie that she also brought yesterday.
It was very good.
"Thank you. How did you like the dressing? The recipe was my mom's."
"That's nice. Did she like to cook?"

Am I a diplomat or not?
:-)

[hippywife]

30. I make the bread stuffing because I don't care for

cornbread stuffing. My MIL makes it and I just didn't like it.

I do used ends of homemade bread that I toss in the freezer. We usually don't end up eating all of it, so in the freezer it goes for homemade bread crumbs and also cubed for stuffing. I do put turkey stock, butter, celery, onions, salt, pepper and sage in it. Used fresh parsley in it yesterday since I had it lying around in the fridge.

Maybe she was just having an off day. :shrug:

[mulsh]

32. no, the worst ever was an oyster, walnut, currant and mystery

ingredients dressing my song writing partner's mom made one year. She told me about the recipe the day before, her exact words were, "My children will hate it" Hate didn't come close. It had a weird petroleum after burn if you could eat it. she very proud of the results. She was a very good cook but as she she got older she decided he kids could start cooking for her. she was big on subtlety.

This year my mother in law tried a stuffing recipe she found in the NY Times, Pork, cranberries, leeks, onions, assorted spices and apples. It was lousy but the gravy was a beautiful brown and really rich in large part due to the stuffing. nest time back to the traditional bread from scratch stuffing.

[noamnety]

33. Awww, sorry your stuffing was awful

I had a mashed potato disaster, tried baking them a day ahead of time and mashing them yesterday morning. Bad. They turned to wallpaper paste. I ended up freezing them to add to soup as thickeners down the road, the husband went out and bought more potatoes an hour before guests came, and I remade them. (At least I have the courtesy not to serve the mistakes to guests!)

Someone was supposed to bring the dreaded green bean casserole, but apparently it got dumped in the lawn in a family feud incident on the way to our house. I love the holidays. :)

[jmowreader]

34. I had to educate my wife about stuffing

Now understand, when she was growing up she only got cornbread stuffing because, apparently, That's What You Serve in Centralia, Illinois. And she'd tried feeding me cornbread before Thanksgiving, only to learn I really can't stand cornbread. She decided to call my mother and ask what I liked to eat on Thanksgiving before our first one, and was told "he loves bread dressing."

Bread dressing to my wife was one bag of Pepperidge Farms bread cubes with a whole can of turkey broth dumped over them. It was as hideous as it sounds. She ate this...well, whatever you want to call it...and wondered why I like bread dressing. Well dear, bread chunk soup is pretty hideous.

The next year, I bought a loaf of bread, tore it up and added two eggs, celery, onions, poultry seasoning, garlic salt, chopped-up pieces of turkey gizzard (I guess you can put the liver in, but in my house turkey liver is cat food) and turkey broth. Now she won't eat cornbread dressing.

[trof]

39. Cornbread, buttermilk, grits. You either like 'em or you don't.

;-)

[AwakeAtLast]

44. I'm from the eastern side of So. IL

Our dressing has always been made from bread, no cornbread. That is very interesting.

Oh, and my grandmother's always had oysters in it, too. She did make a second pan without them for us kids (thankfully!).

[grasswire]

38. this is a great thread -- maybe we can do fruitcake in a few weeks.

I love love love family food stories.

[trof]

42. Oh yeah. That would be good.

[yewberry]

43. You've edged out my m-i-l's dressing. Barely.

A bread dressing, seasoned with something that added no flavor but a disconcerting dark brown color and untoasted pecan halves, the texture of bar soap. Mmmmm.


I didn't bring the one I'd made. That was also bread-based, but involved celery & onion sauteed with dry sherry, toasted hazelnuts, thyme, sage, and veg stock, and it was stuffed into roasted delicata squashes. The husband topped his with asiago cheese--he's a cheese-lover.

[AwakeAtLast]

45. What's interesting is that making dressing from scratch is so easy

I don't understand why the boxes even exist. :shrug:

[marzipanni]

46. Bo-ring!

that dressing sounds disuntasteful! Reminds me of milktoast, something my dad tried to pawn off on us kids as lunch one weekend when my mom went to visit her ailing father.

My favorite dressing/stuffing seasoning, to add to the toasted cubed bread, onions, celery, butter, raisins, broth (and whatever else inspires) is this:
http://www.bellsseasonings.com/BellsSeasoning.html