I believe in the Church of Baseball

[Zomby Woof]

I believe in the Church of Baseball. I've tried all the major religions, and most of the minor ones. I've worshipped Buddha, Allah, Brahma, Vishnu, Siva, trees, mushrooms, and Isadora Duncan. I know things. For instance, there are 108 beads in a Catholic rosary and there are 108 stitches in a baseball. When I heard that, I gave Jesus a chance. But it just didn't work out between us. The Lord laid too much guilt on me. I prefer metaphysics to theology. You see, there's no guilt in baseball, and it's never boring... which makes it like sex. There's never been a ballplayer slept with me who didn't have the best year of his career. Making love is like hitting a baseball: you just gotta relax and concentrate. Besides, I'd never sleep with a player hitting under .250... not unless he had a lot of RBIs and was a great glove man up the middle. You see, there's a certain amount of life wisdom I give these boys. I can expand their minds. Sometimes when I've got a ballplayer alone, I'll just read Emily Dickinson or Walt Whitman to him, and the guys are so sweet, they always stay and listen. 'Course, a guy'll listen to anything if he thinks it's foreplay. I make them feel confident, and they make me feel safe, and pretty. 'Course, what I give them lasts a lifetime; what they give me lasts 142 games. Sometimes it seems like a bad trade. But bad trades are part of baseball - now who can forget Frank Robinson for Milt Pappas, for God's sake? It's a long season and you gotta trust. I've tried 'em all, I really have, and the only church that truly feeds the soul, day in, day out, is the Church of Baseball.

-- Annie Savoy, "Bull Durham"

[PVnRT]

1. Oh no, Crash called him a cocksucker

[Blue_Tires]

2. William Blake?!?!?

[TZ]

3. I'd recommend this if I could

Great movie. Great quote.

[Bertha Venation]

4. Brava!

I had forgotten about that. I need to see that movie again.

[mix]

5. great flick

[Captain Hilts]

6. Great movie. Ya gotta believe. nt

[Gidney N Cloyd]

7. "The world is made for people who aren't cursed with self awareness."

(Another Annie Savoy line)

[Zomby Woof]

8. Strikeouts are boring! Besides that, they're fascist.

Crash Davis: Relax, all right? Don't try to strike everybody out. Strikeouts are boring! Besides that, they're fascist. Throw some ground balls - it's more democratic.
Ebby Calvin LaLoosh: What's this guy know about pitching? If he's so good how come he's been in the minors for the last ten years? If he's so good how come Annie wants me instead of him?
Crash Davis: Oh, hey, and another thing, Meat. You don't know shit, all right? If you wanna make it to the bigs, you'll listen to me. Annie only wants you so she can boss you around, got it? So relax! Let's have some fun out here! This game's fun, OK? Fun goddamnit. And don't hold the ball so hard, OK? It's an egg. Hold it like an egg.

[Oeditpus Rex]

9. Lollygaggers!

[Heidi]

10. Baseball is just alright with me.

:P

[peacefreak]

11. And to that I say....

"Crash" Davis: Well, I believe in the soul, the cock, the pussy, the small of a woman's back, the hanging curve ball, high fiber, good Scotch, that the novels of Susan Sontag are self-indulgent overrated crap. I believe Lee Harvey Oswald acted alone, I believe there ought to be a constitutional amendment outlawing Astroturf and the designated hitter, I believe in the sweet spot, soft core pornography, opening your presents Christmas morning rather than Christmas Eve and I believe in long slow deep soft wet kisses that last three days. Good night. Annie: Oh my.
~sigh~

[Tuesday Afternoon]

14. I just melted.

[Forkboy]

12. It holds me over until the real sports arrive.

:P

[Mad_Dem_X]

13. AMEN!

I love that little speech. :)

[LynneSin]

15. I so wanted to be Annie Savoy - still would

*** sigh ***