Jerks at work

[alarimer]

How do you deal with jerks at work? There is one where I work who is making my life a living hell. Quitting is not an option at the moment, although I am looking for other jobs. He draw me into these stupid arguments and I always take the bait. I can't always tell if he is just doing it to get a rise out of me or not. Today he basically called something I did "shit". I am tired of being treated like dirt by this guy. Nothing I say or do is ever good enough. I am NEVER right, even though even a stopped clock is right twice a day so I can be right once in a while- law of averages, right??? I spent 20 minutes in the bathroom after work crying and then I couldn't even do my usual workout on the treadmill. I was still crying and couldn't breathe enough to run. This guy is making my life miserable. I don't know what to do (besides walking in tomorrow and quitting- which I would LOVE to do but can't). He is also crude and disgusting but I won't go into that here now. That's a whole other chapter in the sordid tale.

[AngryYoungMan]

1. Is this jerk in a position of authority over you?

eom

[alarimer]

6. not really

We have the same title- but I am supposed to defer because he has been there longer. My boss has given him authority (even though we are at the same level in our job classification).

[Webster Green]

2. Crude and disgusting?

Do you have enough ammo for a harrassment complaint?

[alarimer]

9. I am not sure

I have called him on several comments he has made or had the boss speak to him. It goes away for a while. But not forever. I don't think I am willing to take the steps necessary to file a formal complaint. The guy has a heart condition. He is not well and will hopefully retire soon or I will find another job. It isn't that bad most of the time. Today was just a rough day. I will talk to my boss for sure though.

[LastKnight]

3. be nice to your enemies...

nothing pisses them off more. whatever he says... dont let it bother you, just do your job, clock your hours, and ignore him as much as possible. if you have the provocation go for some sort of harassment suit, if you can, but dont stretch too far for it, it might cost you your job. otherwise try talking to his supervisor about it.

-LK

[alarimer]

8. I will try

I am learning to just walk away. I have gotten in trouble before for arguing inappropriately. Nothing formal- just a talking to by the boss.
I am going to talk to the boss tomorrow. I have to say that it is hard to ignore someone when you are alone with them on a boat. In the office I can just leave- take a walk, something but at other times it is tough.

[Coventina]

4. See an HR rep

if your company has one.

You have a hostile working environment.
You DO NOT have to put up with it. This is something I learned the hard way, after 2 years of misery.

[alarimer]

5. I talk to my boss

All the time about it. I am the only one that feels this way though. Everyone else seems to get along with him or it doesn't bother them much. I am the one who reacts; I should just ignore it. He gets my goat and I let him.

[ProudGerman]

7. Your boss has no spine

Sorry, but its his responsibility to make sure that the workplace is pleasant for ALL his employees.

[alarimer]

10. maybe

But some people are just overbearing and there is nothing that can be done about them.

[H2O Man]

11. One option, depending

on a number of factors that only you know, would be to play the guy. I had to do this a few times over the years with people that did things similar to what you describe. I'd find an opportune time, and then ask him/her for their opinion on some work-related thing. It doesn't matter if it was simply acting on my part; it made them feel important, and allowed them to believe that I respected their opinion. You might be surprised how well this works. On the other hand, there are some miserable jerks out there. Sometimes jobs are like flat tires, and you just have to change them. Good luck.

[nini]

12. This jerk is probably threatened by you in some way..

which is why his insecure self has to keep you in 'your place'.

Do you have an HR dept? If so go to it immediately. You said you talk to your boss about it - but your boss is doing nothing you must go over his head.

No way in hell do you have to take this crap from this guy. Take control and take action for yourself.

I wished I worked with you.. I'd get him. I'd get him good - people like that deserve to be shown the door.

[Skittles]

13. TELL ME WHO HE IS

I WILL KICK HIS ASS. Seriously though, this guy is a cruel SOB. The issue is with him, not with you. You need to go higher up the food chain.