Post a joke that is just a punchline, and nothing else

[Pierre.Suave]

for example, the one we ALL should know...

rectum? Damn near killed him... :rofl:

[arbusto_baboso]

1. If it weren't for my horse, I wouldn't have spent that year in college.

Kudos to Lewis Black for that.

[sammythecat]

7. Give me credit for naked, maybe naive, honesty here.

Please.

I thought about this, but I couldn't see the joke. I even did research, for crying out loud, to get this joke. I found an explanation:

"Behind me, I heard a young woman of 25 say, "If it weren’t for my horse, I wouldn’t have spent that year in college." Now, I'm gonna repeat that, because it bears repeating. "If it weren't for my horse..." as in, giddyup, giddyup, let's go — "I wouldn't have spent that year in college," which is a degree-granting institution. Don't think about that too long, or BLOOD will shoot out your NOSE."

Well, I'm getting weak from blood loss and I STILL can't get it. I KNOW it has to be there. Lewis Black is a funny guy. I like his humor. I must have some sort of disability. Maybe it's just denseness, I don't know. Could you please explain this joke? It's bugging me.

[gmoney]

24. There's no real joke...

Black just does a riff on overhearing that statement, and trying to ponder how the horse could have possibly made it possible or necessary for the girl to spend a year in college.

Of course, there are some logical explanations... equestrian/polo scholarship, sold the horse to pay tuition, horse kicked her and she won enough money in settlement to pay tuition, etc.

[sammythecat]

43. I see.

Guess I hadda be there. I don't feel quite so inadequate now.

Thanks :hi:

[BornBlue]

57. I guess I have a dirty mind...

my first though was not a pretty one...as in some woman pay for college using their bodies if you get my drift.

:blush:

[Orrex]

85. You mean she got in on a foal scholarship?

[Orsino]

2. .

"Hey, Beavis. Y'know why Mickey Mouse divorced Minnie? 'Cause she was doin' Goofy. Huh-huh, huh-huh."

[davsand]

3. How many is a brazillion?

I know, I know...

:spank:

[Arugula Latte]

4. Take my wife. Please.

[flvegan]

5. But you see, you can KEEP the duck.

[guitar man]

6. then how did you make the mule cry?

I showed him. :D

[ghostsofgiants]

8. If we're all God's children, why is Jesus so special?

(Overheard by a friend, said by a kid at the mall yesterday.)

[Arkansas Granny]

10. Oh, that's a keeper.

[meegbear]

9. The Aristocrats!

[Goblinmonger]

20. Nice! n/t

[Rambis]

11. One is a flaming Nazi gasbag and the other is just a dirigible

:rofl:

[NoPasaran]

12. Twenty bucks, Father, Same as downtown.

[Iggo]

13. Bangor? No. We were just good friends.

[Iggo]

61. Delete

oops...

[Orrex]

84. Jacket? Don't mind if I do!

[bif]

14. A shithouse door from a tuna trawler. About six feet.

[3.14158675309]

15. THE ARISTOCRATS!

Edit: didn't see Meegbear. +1 to him! :applause:

[gmoney]

21. Yeah, but you told it funnier. ;)

"It's the singer, not the song" as someone in the movie observed.

[3.14158675309]

22. LOL Love the sig line, too!

:hi:

[Prisoner_Number_Six]

16. General Discussion.

Thank yew! I'll be here all week! Don't forget to tip your waitress!

:P

[Bennyboy]

17. Ever hear about the two gay judges that

tried each other?

[gmoney]

19. "One was Patrick FitzGerald, the other was Gerald FitzPatrick"

[no name no slogan]

31. Don't worry, Padre. Richard Nixon just jumped out with my backpack.

Oldie but goodie.

[gmoney]

18. "My AGENT came to my HOUSE?"

[IntravenousDemilo]

23. Ah, you're the OTHER person who knows that joke. Hi. n/m

[gmoney]

25. LOL... maybe you know this one?

"Robert Goulet?"

"Yeah."

[IntravenousDemilo]

53. Yup.

I heard it with "Andrew Lloyd Webber". Same idea, though.

And then there's, "Peter! I can see your house from here!"

[gmoney]

26. "He just THINKS he's Bono."

Variation on "Well, HE has a girlfriend... and she sings..."

[gmoney]

27. Someone had a part of their act where they did this...

I forget who it was, but they would just zip through about 50 punchlines of dirty jokes... funny as hell.

[bluesbassman]

28. "Don't look at me, he packed his own lunch"

[Symarip]

29. BITCH YOU RUINED MY LIFE

[bluesbassman]

32. That's not a punchline, it's an epitaph.

:hide:

[Bucky]

99. Well, technically, it's a line that will get you punched.

Ipso facto

[no name no slogan]

30. Don't look here. The joke's in your hand.

[Pierre.Suave]

33. Whats my hand doing in your pants?

:rofl:

[ElboRuum]

39. PA-ZING!

[no name no slogan]

48. Nice post, Sen. Craig.

:eyes:

[Pierre.Suave]

60. tap tap tap

:P

[mikeytherat]

34. Liquor? I don't even know her!

mikey_the_rat

[baldguy]

35. .

[Pierre.Suave]

36. well done sir

well done!

:rofl:

[baldguy]

40. It's that vacant, soulless stare that does it.

[backtoblue]

37. Twat did you say? I c$nt hear you! I must have an ear infucktion.

tactless, yet satisfying....:hide:

[gmoney]

55. Bareass me again later...

[ElboRuum]

38. I think so Brain... But where are we going to get a duck and a rubber hose at this hour?

[DarkTirade]

41. and he said, "You think that's bad? Imagine how SHE feels about it!"

[no name no slogan]

42. Def Leppard

The question: what has nine arms and sucks?

[Iggo]

62. He's all right now.

The question: You hear Def Leppard's drummer lost his left arm?

[Deep13]

44. Peter! I can see my house from up here! nt

[namahage]

45. "How do you think I rang the doorbell?" n/t

[Inchworm]

46. We wanted to be first in line for "Closed for the Winter!!!"

:eyes:

:hi:

EDIT: oops, reading comprehension fail. That's the punchline with nothing else...

[realisticphish]

47. super calloused fragile mystic plagued with halitosis

[davsand]

68. Oh my. Is there any way you can share that entire joke with me? Please?

Just seeing that punchline made me laugh.

I am also a HUGE fan of the "Small Medium at Large" joke so you just know my taste is probably gonna be suspect...

:evilgrin:


Laura

[realisticphish]

71. ghandi

loosely, retold:

ghandi walked around barefoot all the time, so his feet got pretty rough on the bottom. And his hunger strikes led him to be very skinny. The bad diet also made his teeth not so great. so....

it can be told much better, but that's the gist of it :D

[JimGinPA]

69. Akin To - Two Obese Patties, Special Ross, Lester Heeves Picking His Bunions On a Sesame Street Bus

B-)

[davsand]

81. My mental image of HOW you got there is pretty bad.

Care to enlighten me? Please?


Laura

[DinahMoeHum]

49. Was that before or after you slept with him?

:evilgrin:

[Deep13]

50. Police issued a bulletin for a small medium at large. nt

[WinkyDink]

51. "President George W. Bush."

[AllenVanAllen]

52. No matter where you go, there you are...

[DemBones DemBones]

54. "You ask me if I know the big bad bandit? I had

lunch with him."

[LynneSin]

56. George W. Bush

:eyes:

[LeftOfSelf-Centered]

58. Supercollider? I just met her!

And then they built the Supercollider.

-- Humorbot 5.0 from Futurama

[BornBlue]

59. They said a black man would never be President,

but 100 days in the swine flu.

[Iggo]

63. Hello, big lady!

[Iggo]

64. A little, at first.

[Debi]

65. You don't understand...Chunks is my DOG!

x(

[flying rabbit]

87. ...

:rofl:

[Debi]

90. One of the best! n/t

[Iggo]

66. Stay Free Mini Pads.

:rofl:

[Dyedinthewoolliberal]

67. Here's one

Eats shoots and leaves.

"ba-boom"

[CJCRANE]

70. Those aren't teabags! n/t

[cloudbase]

72. "Don't tell me you've got golf clubs in there!"

or,

firetruck.

[Deja Q]

73. "Windows Vista".

:evilgrin:

[JBoy]

74. A teenager from Sheboygan, Wisconsin.

:hide:

[Mike 03]

75. I got the only vehicle in the world that has traveled more miles vertically than

horizontally.

[SalmonChantedEvening]

76. Hugh, and only Hugh can prevent Florist Friars

[sniffa]

77. From: God

[Witchy_Dem]

78. Because they didn't push ticket sales

[rurallib]

79. "Rudolph the Red, knows rain, dear!"

[sarge43]

80. Deleted

[hellbound-liberal]

82. Practice! Practice! Practice!

from Henny Youngman

[SKKY]

83. Because the hotdogs taste like shit!

[Dyedinthewoolliberal]

86. Another

"You never gave me $20 before"

[flying rabbit]

88. Holy shit! A talking muffin!

[Iggo]

89. Hey, Hugh! Get off of McCloud!

:rofl:

[Pierre.Suave]

91. this thread makes me

:rofl:

[hellbound-liberal]

92. They didn't like the way their father was "rearing" them.

[underpants]

93. If'n she ain't good enough for her family she ain't good enough fuh 'arn

[Chemical Bill]

94. I'm sorry honey, I forgot that your brother asked for the car.

Absolutely the most offensive joke I know.

Bill

[hellbound-liberal]

95. It's a knickknack, Patty Black! Give the frog a loan!

[Pierre.Suave]

96. rectum? Damn near killed him...

:P

[Esra Star]

97. .....and I turned into a motel.......

tres, tres funny.

[Bucky]

98. They polled 100 men between the ages of 18 and 45 and they all said...

"OUCH!"