New Driving rules! Just in time for rush hour!

[gator_in_Ontario]

Written for Quebec drivers, but apply almost anywhere...

Fifteen New Regulations in the Ministère des Transport du Quebéc
2004 Handbook

1. Turn signals will give away your next move. A confident Quebec driver avoids using them.

2. Under no circumstance should you maintain a safe distance between you and the car in front of you, because the space will be filled in by somebody else, putting you in an even more dangerous situation.

3. The faster you drive through a red light, the less of a chance you have of getting hit.

4. Warning! Never come to a complete stop at a stop sign. No one expects it and it will result in your being rear-ended.

5. Never get in the way of an older car that needs extensive bodywork, especially with Quebec plates. With no insurance, the other operator has nothing to lose.

6. Braking is to be done as hard and late as possible to ensure that your ABS kicks in, giving a vigorous, foot massage as the brake pedal violently pulsates. For those of you without ABS, it's a chance to strengthen your leg muscles.

7. Never pass on the left when you can pass on the right. It's a good way to prepare other drivers entering the highway.

8. Speed limits are arbitrary figures; given only as a suggestion and are not enforceable in Quebec during rush hour, especially on the 401.

9. Just because you're in the left lane and have no room to speed up or move over doesn't mean that an Quebec driver flashing his high beams behind you doesn't think he can go faster in your spot.

10. Always brake and rubberneck when you see an accident or even someone changing a tire. This is seen as a sign of respect for the victim.

11. Learn to swerve abruptly without signaling. Quebec is the home of high-speed slalom-driving; thanks to the Department of Public Works, which puts pot-holes in key locations to test drivers' reflexes and keep them alert.

12. It is tradition in Quebec to honk your horn at cars in front of you that do not move three milli-seconds after the light turns green.

13. To avoid injury in the event of a collision or rollover, it is important to exit your vehicle thru the windshield right away. Wearing your seat belt will only impede your hi-velocity escape from danger.

14. Remember that the goal of every Quebec driver is to get ahead of the pack by whatever means necessary.

15. In Quebec, 'flipping the bird', is considered a polite salute. This gesture should always be returned.

Thank You,
Ministère des Transport du Quebéc

[hobbes159]

1. Sounds just like Boston drivers

:-)

[izzie]

2. Never go to Saudi and guess what women do not drive.

They were not born that dumb. By the way I knew a lady from Canada and she said when she grew up, she would be 70 now, you just sent in your name and they let you drive.Odd, I think I know a lot of people in the USA that got to drive the same way, and to day. I am ready to just give it all up as I always hated to drive. Most people my age should not be driving, as they are so bad on the road. Is today my last day of driving? It maybe.I need a reason better than i hate to drive.

[demsrule4life]

4. I have driven in Saudi

what a trip. The only country at one point whose population actually decreased with all the fatal accidents. I drove in Turkey for two years without an accident. I drove like they did, get out of my way or die. If you tried to drive careful you were sure to have an accident.

[joshdawg]

3. I have driven in a lot of states and cities....

and, apparently, these rules are in place in all of them.