I need cheering up. Good gawd.

[Lil Missy]

I've been roundly berated and chastized the last few days by my ex over her lost opportunities due to her numerous arrests for Domestic Violence.

That is MY fault. Jeezus. Just shoot me now.

God Damn.

[Aristus]

1. How about if we just hug you now?

Oh sweetie...

:hug:

[Lil Missy]

5. That helps.

:hug:

[Tuesday Afternoon]

2. Sorry, misunderstood.

[Lil Missy]

6. I sure hope not! Are you serious?

Please explain, in case I misunderstood you.

[Tuesday Afternoon]

7. Are these charges that you have brought against her?

:shrug:

[Lil Missy]

9. Yes. 4 times.

[Tuesday Afternoon]

11. Sorry.

:hug:

[Lil Missy]

19. I'm glad we clarified. I was afraid you were asking me to help her expunge her record!

[applegrove]

43. Glad she is your ex. You shouldn't have to live like that. I would stop talking to her if you don't

have kids together. I really would. Sounds like she is sucking the life outta ya from where she is now.

[Lil Missy]

48. Oh good gawd no we don't have kids together!

She was gone, I got rid of her. But she came back.

I'll deal with it again. I'm not sure how yet, but it is probably not going to be pretty. I DO have a limit. And then watch the fuck out! I don't take prisoners.

[Danger Mouse]

3. I wuv you.

that help?
:hug:

[Lil Missy]

8. Shhhhh! That was supposed to be our secret!

:P


:*

[Jamastiene]

4. Uhm, if she was violent toward you, she has no one to blame but herself for that.

I know it's hard to do right now, but the best thing anyone ever told me was to hold my head up high and know I was in the right. In a situation where I was blamed for someone else's own actions, that was the hardest thing for me to grasp, but it was the best thing I ever learned.

:hug:

[Lil Missy]

12. I know, she has no one to blame but herself.

I did not contact her after I kicked her ass out.

[mcctatas]

10. I'm sorry sweetie...

but I admire you for having the strength to bring the charges and to be done with her, it is a hard row to hoe and a lot of us aren't as brave

[Lil Missy]

13. People just baffle me sometimes.

She has a criminal record now. It came back to bite her in the ass. Well DUH!

[PaddyBlueEyes]

16. You are braver than you give yourself credit

for...and I will be with you through all of it....ILY

[PaddyBlueEyes]

14. I work in law enforcement

and deal with this stuff on a daily basis. THIS IS NOT YOUR FAULT. This is the abusers way of making you feel guilty and getting you to drop the charges. You are the victim here....Hang in there.

[Lil Missy]

17. Last arrest. Almost 2 year ago. Police have these pics. I think this is why she is so pissed now.

I don't know what happened. Somehow she got burned on this evidence. And the hospital records.

Fuck that shit.

[PaddyBlueEyes]

18. You did the right thing

Dont ever question yourself. Those bruises dont come by normal force, that is assault ...Im glad you got away from her....You are one of the lucky ones.

[Lil Missy]

33. So, what are my choices now? Since she is bringing this crap upon me again!

I have an extremely low tolerance for this kind of drama. She not only terrorized me, but my mother and my pets.

I don't know what the hell happened with her, but it had something to do with her having a criminal record. And that is MY fault. Jeezus!

I just don't know what to do at this point. My only few thoughts are to perhaps to contact her HR department, since she does contact me from work, and/or bust her ass in a mass email to all her friend, family, and work contacts.

I really hate drama, and just want to be left alone. But it also really pisses me off to be bullied too. I may explode!

God Damn!

[ikojo]

36. Here's a hug for you...

:hug:

I would not do the mass email thing but if she is calling you at work, I'd first ask her in writing to stop that and explain to her if she does not stop then you will have no choice but to contact her boss at work. I think it's important that you first show you did ask her to stop.

[Lil Missy]

37. I guess I did not explain that very clearly.

She is contacting ME, at my home, through her work account. I have already made my feelings very clear. I will not take responsibility or blame for her crap or Criminal Record.

I do not like drama or the mass email shit either. But I am wondering if that is my only choice. At least if her circle has my story, the Police reports, and pictures, she might be a little more busy dealing with that and them, and leave me the fuck alone.

I am tired of her playing the goddamned innocent victim. I want to smash that damned facade or hers. I've been too nice, and I am fucking sick and tired of it.

[Blue Diadem]

40. Have you checked into a PPO?

I'd think you would be able to get a personal protection order to keep her from contacting you or suddenly showing up in person.

[Lil Missy]

47. The PPO expired after a year.

I have no idea what happened, but somehow her criminal record bit her in the ass, and now it is my fault.

That is why I suspect an email to her family, friends, and work contacts might be in order. With Police reports, pictures, and everything. It would get her off my ass. She'd have plenty to 'splain to others, not to mention it would embarrass the shit outta her.

Oh no, she would never show up here announced. LOL!

[Blue Diadem]

50. I'm sure you already know that no way is it your fault.

She may never realize that she is responsible for what she's done and will have to suffer whatever consequences come her way as a result of her previous actions. It's very typical of an abuser to never take responsibility for what they've done, to them it's always the recipient of their abuse who is at fault, either for "making" them do it or for reporting them.

If it continues I'd suggest looking into another PPO, especially since she's blaming you. With her prior record for assault against you, you shouldn't have a problem getting another one since she's contacting you.

[Lil Missy]

51. So, are you saying I should not take this chance to shove it back?

I know it was not my fault. I know that is NEVER, EVER, appropriate to resort to violence. I was going to say, especially over stupid shit, but that does not even matter. It's just never okay.

I know she will never take responsibility. She apologized a hundred times, and in tears. And then did it again over and over again a hundred times. Always so remorseful, especially after a night sleeping on a jail slab.

But always, the apologies and tears were qualified by somehow I made her do it. Fuck that. And somehow, all this time later, her record is causing her trouble. Fuck that shit too. She is playing the poor innocent victim.

I'd like to put a rest to this crap very swiftly and succinctly. She counts on me being "too nice". I could ruin her in one felled swoop. And I am seriously considering that.

I do have a limit.

[Blue Diadem]

52. My concern is that if you do a massive email that it may anger her to the point that

she may look to you to take it out on. At least with a PPO, if she's forbidden to email you or call you, it might stop her. IMO, her being bold enough to contact you to blame you could be looked upon as another threat since she's hurt you in the past.

[Lil Missy]

56. She is not going to show up on my door. LOL! She knows better!

I have the emails if necessary.

Honestly, I think the best and quickest way to cut her off at the knees is to send an email to a few select people, with pics and Police reports. Including her HR contact. She is firing the shot, and I am not "nice" anymore. I am tired of this crap.

I am very patient, but I have a limit. Then, watch the fuck out!

[Tangerine LaBamba]

59. Here's what you do:

Having worked as a volunteer attorney for battered women, I have a few suggestions for you, but you are the one who will have to take the steps:

1. No more contact with her, not even to warn her off;
2. No more contact with her - did you hear what I just said?
3. NONE;
4. Assemble dates and times of the phone calls, if you can. Your phone company can help you with that;
5. Get the name and address of her immediate supervisor;
6. If you can't find that, get the name of the CEO or president or whomever is in charge;
7. Put together a letter - not angry, not hysterical, just stating the facts (with dates of the police calls and the convictions) - and explain what your ex has been doing, using the company's phones;
8. Enclose copies of whatever documentation you have about these matters;
9. Enclose copies of the photographs you posted here;
10. Mail it, snail-mail, certified mail, return receipt requested.
11. Call your phone company and tell them you're getting these phone calls from this person at this number, and they'll tell you exactly what to do;
12. Stay calm.
13. Do all this right away.
14. Remember that you're right and she isn't.
15. Make sure everyone you know is informed about these events.
16. Good luck.

[Lil Missy]

65. Thank you. I have half of this done already.

bookmarked.

God Damn. She is firing bullets now, after all this time. Now I am really pissed, and I will respond with a bazooka.

[Sheltiemama]

69. Good Lord.

I've never seen bruises like that.

[Lil Missy]

70. Yup. And that does not show the head, neck and eye xrays. n/t

[BlueIris]

15. That's called projection. And a few other things. Like insane.

I'm glad this person is your ex. Keep it that way.

[Lil Missy]

20. No prob. She's gone on to make other lives miserable now.

:)

[coyotespaw]

21. You're too god damned good

to even bother talking to her. Next time she calls you, tell her that the party you have reached is too indifferent to come to the phone. You can, and should be doing, better than her. I'm sure the curb's within kicking distance for her.

[Lil Missy]

23. Yeah, I did kick her out. 'Bout 18 months ago. She had to live and sleep in her car, LOL!

Something happened recently. I don't know what. But apparently it has something to do with her arrest record, and that is MY fault.

She's lucky I am not a violent person. Otherwise she'd be missing her head.

On an amusing note, my pets KNEW. They kept pissing on her side of the bed!

OMG, she'd get so mad. :rofl:

NO pissing "accidents" since I kicked her as out. Pets are not stupid.

:)

[Richard Steele]

22. I have nothing to say that will make you feel better, but I can empathize.

If I had any wisdom about such matters, I probably
wouldn't have been where you are as many times
as I have been.

As I am now.

All I can say is that EVERYONE ONE OF US is horribly flawed;
when you open your heart wide enough to recieve LOVE,
you open it wide enough to let just about everything else
wash in with the tides.

That's the risk we take with the deal we make that we call "love".

That "love" thing has ended my entire life 3 times now, by my count...
I'm currently 40 and starting over again with a cot in a friend's basement
that I leave to go to part-time a minimum-wage job, and i just gotta say:
I REGRET NOTHING.

The memories of the bad bits fade fast, but the FEELINGS
of the special moments never fade at all.

I've lived small and tight, but I have LOVED LARGE,
and I've gotten my ass kicked every single time (So far).
But it was worth it every time.



I know you're dealing with a really tall pile of shit right now,
but there's a secret to dealing with tall piles of shit:
Don't bust your back trying to MOVE it; don't bust your wallet
paying for storage...

You spend about 5 minutes a day tending the edges with a flat shovel,
and sooner or later you'll look out your window at a good hard rain
that dissolves it and washes it away.


Richard

[Lil Missy]

24. Well, that was really profound!

:hi:

[Richard Steele]

25. Are you being complimetary or SARCASTIC?

Either way, I don't care.

When it comes to MEMORIES, MAGIC lasts and grows forever;
PAIN fades and HISTORY doesn't have PAIN on the guest list.

Every time I have ever sensed the presence of 'Love',
I have immediately SPRINTED to the end of my penis
and leapt off with my eyes closed.

It's been a series of wild rides that have taken me everywhere,
and kicked me to the curb at age 40, toothless and dead broke.

I wouldn't trade one minute of my life for 100 million dollars.

[Lil Missy]

28. I was not being sarcastic at all. I really thought your words were very thoughtful and profound.

I am very sorry if my response sounded dismissive.

I did love her, very much, but it is too hurtful now for me to articulate here.

I have no bones to pick with you. And I am very sorry that I offended you.

Gawd, I'm just having a bad day.

[Richard Steele]

84. You never came close to "offending" me, so there's no need to apologize...

I'm kinda slow when it comes to "people issues",
so you never came close to offending me, you just
kinda bordered on "making me wonder".

I intended my first comment to be "thoughtful",
seeing as how I spent some time thinking about it...
but "profound"?
Wow, I'm blushing right now.

I've been a lot of places in my 40 years,
seen and done a lot of stuff, and a lot of folks
have thrown a lot of adjectives my way.....
this might be the first time I've ever been on the recieving end of "PROFOUND".

What do I do? Do I just say "thank you" and log off,
or is there some sort of ceremonial phrase required to respond to 'profound'?
Do I need to come by your house and kiss your ring?

If that's what I need to do to make you GRIN for a moment,
then I'll do it.

Life is SHORT, but PAIN is even shorter in our memories.
You had good times with that person- times that no one else
in history ever had. Don't mourn the fact that there won't
be any more of them, rejoice in the fact that you had them
while six BILLION human beings went without.

KnowhutImean?

[Lil Missy]

86. I did think your first response was very thoughtful.

I am apparently a little slow when it comes to "people issues" too. I can see that my response could have come across as dismissive and rather cool. I apologize, because it was certainly not personal nor intentional.

Yes, I agree that my response could make you "border on wondering" whether my response was honest or snarky. I apologize, and I did not have any intention to diss you. I am sorry.

LOL! You make me laugh. You do have some profound things to say, in your own experience and fate given right to repeat your experiences.

Naw, you don't have to come and ceremonially kiss my ass or my ring. No.

But tell you what, if you cross my way, I'd better get a PM and a meet-up. Otherwise .... well.. I may take away your birthday!

[Richard Steele]

87. OMAHA?? Seriously, the one in Nebraska? Wow!

I don't think I'll be dropping by any time soon,
and that's a fact!


I've seen pictures of Nebraska in January, and
the pictures alone are enough to make me put on
another sweater and start reminiscing about the time
I lived in North Carolina!

[Lil Missy]

88. Yep, THAT Omaha.

Mom and I are freezing our tits off!

I about have to push the pooch out the door to do his "business". Poor little guy is about 20 pounds, and when he goes out to pee his poor little hooter is about frozen stiff! Well, I don't blame him for not liking that!!

Seriously, if you ever do pass through the midwest, shoot me a PM.

:hi:

[Richard Steele]

89. Hey, "same offer" right backatcha., since I'm never gonna be there....

It's not so much that I don't have any plans to be there,
so much as I have a general plan to NEVER be there.
I hate the snow & the cold

If you ever happen to be ANYWHERE on the East Coast,
PM me and we'll see if we can hook up somewhere.


I should warn you: I'm much less interesting in real life.

[Richard Steele]

90. Hey, "same offer" right backatcha., since I'm never gonna be there....

It's not so much that I don't have any plans to be there,
so much as I have a general plan to NEVER be there.
I hate the snow & the cold

If you ever happen to be ANYWHERE on the East Coast,
PM me and we'll see if we can hook up somewhere.


I should warn you: I'm much less interesting in real life.

[crimsonblue]

26. Just think of the truffle shuffle...

and that will rid you of your anger.

[Lil Missy]

30. No problem. I beat my pets on a regular basis.

:)

[IdaBriggs]

27. Allow me to berate you instead.

Lil Miss, you were sleeping with an idiot!

Yup, its ALL YOUR FAULT because YOU SLEPT WITH AN IDIOT.

The woman is a complete moran, and you SLEPT with her. Repeatedly. More than once.

Here she is, a complete imbecile, and you slept with her. You probably even LOVED her.

Obviously, her complete lack of character and basic common decency were problems you should have ignored. The fact she has a criminal record because of criminal behavior has nothing to do with her -- your Secret Mind Control Power (where you took her over and forced her to behave badly, also preventing her from leaving before she could raise a hand in anger) is legendary, and now we all know you are a Super Secret Weapon that our enemies should be really afraid of because, It Is All Your Fault, You Powerful Magic Person.

(Do I need to put sarcasm tags in here?)

Seriously, you were sleeping with an idiot, so the reason its your fault was that YOU DIDN'T REALIZE SHE WAS AN IDIOT!!!!

:argh:

Feel better? LOL!

[Lil Missy]

29. LOL! Well since you put it THAT way .....

:rofl:

Hey, how are the babes? I want some pics! And soon!

:hi:

[IdaBriggs]

31. They are doing great -- my son is a monkey,

and is scaring the beejeezus out of me by climbing on dressers, tables, counter-tops -- you name it. They are almost 23 months old now, and he will chant 'Get Down! Get Down! Get Down!' while he's doing it.

My daughter prepared her first meal yesterday while I was showering/Daddy was watching her. She got into my spice drawer (how can she reach it?) and then poured a bunch of them into the crock-pot (in its cupboard). Then she put the spices away in a better/more accessible drawer. If she hadn't left the crock-pot cupboard door open, I might not have noticed immediately.

They're good. Very, very, very good! LOL! I am *SO* screwed!

[Lil Missy]

32. OMG, has it been that long?

I recall the days when my son gave me a damned heart attack on a daily basis. Playing Superman or bonsai through the house all the time. He landed on his face against a corner of the dishwasher once. A call a work, and several stitches required.

And that thing about being able to fly down the basement steps. Gawd, talk about gray hair. I had that blocked off like Fort Knox. Only time he ever saw the basement was when I grabbed him by his pants and practically threw him down there, cause a tornado was shaking the whole house.

Oh yeah, you are *SO* screwed, LOL!

Did I mention the time he "helped" with laundry, and poured a whole bottle of Tide into the dryer and turned it on High? *groan*

[Lil Missy]

34. kick

[Lil Missy]

35. I still need cheering up.

[Gormy Cuss]

41. Let's play cards

silly attempt at cheering you up, Lil Missy

[Lil Missy]

42. Now that's not fair! You know I love poochies!

Taking unfair advantage of me now! :spank:

:P

(PS, like to play spades? I'm ruthless.)

[oshyposhy]

44. oh sweetie

I am so glad you are not in that situation now! Seeing your bruises made me angry and sad at the same time, and just at a loss for why people can be such meany jerk faces.
:hug:

[Lil Missy]

49. Hey, aren't you that new freeper I keep seeing and hearing about?

Kidding!!!!

Thank you.

:hug:

[oshyposhy]

72. Prolly...

I'd distract you with my boobs, but I understand that isn't tolerated on these boards.

[Lil Missy]

75. Well, there is alway PM.

:evilgrin:

[malta blue]

38. Because you MADE her hurt you?

I am sorry :hug:

[Lil Missy]

45. Yep. I MADE her do it.

I never knew when, what, how, or why.

No sorry necessary. I was an idiot.

Ya know what was really telling and poetic. My pets alway knew when she was building a tirade before I did. My dog would camp on my feet constantly, or insist upon being in my lap. The cats would go piss on her side of the bed. LOL!

Sure enough, the pets were right every single time. Shhhhh! That's a secret!

:)

[Haole Girl]

39. Do you have to have contact with your ex?

:shrug:

:hug:

[Lil Missy]

46. No! I don't!

[SalmonChantedEvening]

53. No. It isn't.

C'mere :hug: :loveya:

[Lil Missy]

58. Now, stop that!

I was having a bad mood. And you went and made me smile and ruined it all.

:hug: :loveya:


Asshole.

[SalmonChantedEvening]

62. Hehehe

:hug:

And may I add...





















No :P
:loveya:

[Born_A_Truman]

54. Block her email

If she calls, don't answer the phone.

[Pharaoh]

55. This Might make you smile....

[4 t 4]

57. OMG ! berated by who,

him and or those who still refuse to see the truth ? I'm glad your still alive it just escalates anyone can tell you that. No one deserves those bruises-no one. Take care of yourself. He needs to get help and move on.

[Lil Missy]

61. Huh?

[Lil Missy]

60. I think you meant well, but that scene is not pleasant.

[Pharaoh]

64. sorry, my mind was elsewhere

I blame these guys!

[SPKrazy]

63. What a bunch of horse hockey

to quote Col Potter from MASH

:hug:

[SoxFan]

66. Here. Cat therapy.

[Lil Missy]

67. LOL! Aren't they snotty little assholes?

I lurves my snotty little butthole kitties.

Got any puppy pics?

[SoxFan]

68. Pippy tries to be snotty but fails

She thinks she's a little badass, but she is really a little mushball who knows when you need a nuzzle.

[Lil Missy]

71. Yeah, my kitties are mushballs too. But I have to pretend I don't know that.

Everything works a lot better here if they think they are in charge. LOL! Fine with me. Whatever works, ya know?

:)

[PaddyBlueEyes]

74. How ya doing tonight?

Better I hope..:hug:

[Lil Missy]

76. I am doing well, and getting stronger by the minute.

Thank you for asking!

:hug: :hi:

[elshiva]

73. You are awesome, honey.

:hug: :hug:

[Lil Missy]

77. I'm not awsome, but I think this was really sweet of you.

:hug: :hug: :hi:

I just got done complainig to Skinner and the Mods that you must be a freeper cause no librul would think that unicorns are pink!

Now, quit pretending to be nice and adorable! Or I'll alert you again!

:)

[elshiva]

78. I am nice. Also, as I said before I am a pink unicorn.

So there! AND YOU ARE AWESOME! :hug: :hug:

[Lil Missy]

79. Alerted.

Freeper.

Unicorns are not pink!

:hug: :*

[elshiva]

80. UNICORNS ARE PINK!

AND YOU ARE AWESOME! SO THERE!
:) :hug: :hug: :*

[Lil Missy]

82. Unicorns are not pink!

Freeper.

[elshiva]

83. ARE TOO!

[Fire Walk With Me]

81. Okay.

Check my new autosignature. :hug:

[Lil Missy]

85. LOL!

:rofl: :rofl: