What can you do with a kid

[holeinboatoutatsea]

that is seemingly perfect?

It's driving me crazy. I have dozens of flaws and problems, but this kiddo just keeps happily chugging along.

What should I do??????

I can't take it anymore!

[rwheeler31]

1. Relax

and enjoy that childs love of life.

[southerngirlwriter]

2. Wait.

They'll hit adolescence eventually. Maybe at 12, maybe at 14, maybe at 30. Eventually they will.

:evilgrin:

[Ellen Forradalom]

3. Trade you.

You know something about childrearing that I don't, apparently.

[ChoralScholar]

4. whatever you do

(not saying that you would)

don't make the child feel as if they can't please you.

I was a great kid. Always followed the rules.. was an honor student, All-State Band and Choir.. etc. etc.

Everyone else thought I was great.. but my mother, in an effort to make sure I didn't think well of myself, nitpicked me to death about stupid stuff like loading the dishwasher or for reading too much, or whatever. She would positively act disgusted with me because of these minutiae.

So... in a word... if the kid is really perfect, teach him/her to be humble, but don't make it a personal mission to beat them down.

This was not directed at you at all, holeinboatoutatsea. But it seems to be an epidemic among really good kids. I lived it, and I see it a lot in my students.

[holeinboatoutatsea]

5. good reply

I just am in awe at how responsible the kiddo is.

Absolutely, give positive responses.

I just look at my life, and seem to be so much more cynical or negative. I love having another aspect around!

[Rabrrrrrr]

6. Gotta agree with ChoralScholar

It's wonderful you have the wonderful, amazing kid - would that all children should be so well behaved and respected by their parents.

But like ChoralScholar I was the good kid partly driven by an inherent disposition to just being a nice, helpful person, for whatever reason some people are given that; but also through a mother who was relentless in nitpicking the shortfallings, and thus I strove for *exceptional* goodness in order to quench her tirades; once I got older, and realized part of my mom's problem was reaction against my father's alcoholism, I dealt with it much better. But there were some really, really tough, tension-filled years.

So I have in me the question, when I see really well behaved kids, whether their parents are abusive, or if the kid just has a really good disposition. Most times, seems the kid has a good disposition, but sometimes it seems to have come from a fear of a parental tirade if they go out of line. Those kids are usually (not always) kids of alcoholics, or kids of someone who had an alcoholic parent.

Alcoholism can do damage for a number of generations, even if the subsequent generations DON'T have alcoholism.

Anyway, I went off on a tangent close to my heart. I'm not trying to imply that the original poster is an alcoholic by any means! I don't know that person from Adam.

Totally agree with the "teach them humility" but don't destroy them with it.

I hope this post made sense, since I seemed to have careened over a number of topics.

[wickerwoman]

12. Ditto. I was a goody-two-shoes too

and looking back I wish I'd pushed some limits that needed pushing.

Plus my parents were always trying to hold me back so they could stroke my brother's ego.

Typical story- we went to buy a new car when I was about 9 and my brother was 8. I was yelled at and had to sit in our old car for touching a window and leaving fingerprints. Meanwhile, my brother gets into a car, drops the parking brake and starts backing into traffic. No one was hurt and nothing was damaged thankfully. When my parents got him out of the car it was "oh my darling, my poor baby!" and they bought him a bloody ice cream.

If I got good grades, I needed to get a job. If I got a job, it wasn't as important as playing on the football team. Basic message- if my brother did it (no matter how tiny an accomplishment) it was a big deal. If I did it, why wasn't I doing more?

Blech...

[Shananigans]

7. Take a DNA test...

[DEM FAN]

8. Give It All The Love In The World.

;-)

[Exultant Democracy]

9. Help them develop a quixotic dysfunction

Perhaps if you only let them right with there non-dominant hand you could give 'em a stutter. Not a debilitating one mind you, but an endearing one like Hugh Grant.

[SoCalDem]

10. Wait...

I am assuming that the kid is a...kid.? That kid will be a teen and you will need these wonderful memories to get you over the rough spots..:evilgrin:

I watched a scientific show once that explained it this way.. Babies/parents bond is so deep, because the infant is so cute and vulnerable, and those sweet memories keep the parents from murdering that same child,when at 16, they wreck the new car or "borrow" the atm card :evilgrin:

We have 3 sons, and they ran the gamut.. The oldest was shy and a loner..smart as a whip, but hated school

Middle.. Rebel with a capital R..always in trouble..also hated school

youngest.. He was the one with the halo.. the "golden child"..

We never overtly favored any of them over another, but deep down , the baby of the family was a lot more fun to be around..

They are all grown now, and our youngest often says that he tried very hard NOT to be a brat, because of all the trouble his brother caused for us.. He wanted to make it easier for us..:)

See what I mean :):):)


Enjoy it... but please don't say things like that around that perfect child:).. There will be a time when rebellion is natural, and perfection is a huge burden on a teen or adolescent :)

[Mick Knox]

11. How old?

[Fight_n_back]

13. EBay?

Drive into the country and leave him there? (or is that dogs and cats...)