So, a friend of mine is going to die. And I am extremely angry about it. For many reasons!

[Lil Missy]

We were never especially close, but we had friends, or mates with mutual friends in common, so we always crossed paths. And always cordially.

I knew she had some kind of lung condition that she said was kinda serious, but she was always fine when I saw her, and she said she was doing great. She WAS fine.

She got really sick a couple months ago. A cold or something, and she's been in the hospital, in Intensive Care, and on life support since then. Yesterday, they called in her family to discuss taking her off the life support measures, because she has not responded for weeks. She weighs about 70-80 pounds now. This lady is in her 40's!

Ya know what REALLY pisses me off? Her "supposed" partner, who chased this woman half to death to eventually win some monetary and babysitting benefits, has gone to see the supposed love of her life exactly TWICE, in the last six weeks! Her partner is not just sick, she is dying! If she's not essentially dead already.

I'm sorry, but I am just insanely angry right now. They are probably going to pull the plug on D today. And her "partner" is surely sitting at home wondering who might babysit, or buy her next beer.

I am not a violent person; not at all. I avoid confrontations to a fault. And often to my detriment. But god damn. Sometimes I'd like to slap the holy shit out of certain people.

[CaliforniaPeggy]

1. I don't blame you for being angry...

I sure would be too...

What a terrible death...so young, too young.

And her lover? Doesn't sound like much of a lover to me...

My condolences on the death of your friend...

:hug:

[Lil Missy]

3. Thanks Peg. I appreciate the condolences.

To be clear, D is not having a horrible death. She is quite comfortable. I don't even know if her "supposed" partner is in the loop right now.

They are probably going to pull the life support today. How much does that say for her "partner" that she does not even know what is going on?

[FloridaJudy]

2. My condolences.

Her supposed SO doesn't sound like much of a friend, let alone a partner. I'd probably be hard pressed to hold my tongue during the funeral.

I'm so sorry. :hug:

[Lil Missy]

4. Thank you. I really do appreciate your words.

You are so right, this SO of hers has a record of being the heartless piece of shit she is. CPS has bounced her several times, and seem to be wanting to take her kids into protective custody.

I witnessed some of that neglect one night. Made me sick, and I had to go toss my cookies. My friends chalked it off as I got sick cause I drank too much. Not true at all. I got sick because her 2 year old daughter was brought there, crying and screaming she wanted her mom. This bitch said mommy is busy tonight, and didn't even give her a hug. That's why I had to go puke.

I don't have to worry about holding my tongue. There are too many people ahead of me that would like to slap her senseless right now.

But, OMG! I DO have a tongue if pushed to my limit. Then, WATCH OUT!! I don't take prisoners!

[lildreamer316]

5. Fuck that. Do it.

I am not a violent person. Anyone is welcome to pull up my posts for the last four years and see how many times I've advocated and maybe actually done violence to someone. But maybe a slap to the side of the head of the partner would be the best thing to wake her up.

Sorry. This just really pisses me off too. Maybe I don't mean the above.

[Lil Missy]

6. Oh, I am not going to lower myself to her level.

And there is no way I could ever resort to violence. Maybe I am just a sissy, but I WILL NOT go there.

So, sometimes I gotta puke instead.

[applegrove]

7. Sounds awful. Vibes to that woman and her family.

[Lil Missy]

8. Thank you.

Her name is Donna.

Her SO's name is MUD right now.

[applegrove]

11. I cannot believe anyone could be so cold. That SO must have some sorta mental disorder.

[Lil Missy]

13. CPS is after her children. And I am fucking sick that people act like that is a surprise.

[Haole Girl]

9. I'm sorry to hear about your friend

What awful circumstances. I've been there... and I wouldn't wish it upon anyone (not anyone).

I'm not sure what to say about her partner. Your anger is understandable.

:hug:

[Lil Missy]

10. Oh, the SO has no idea what is going on.

I swear to god, if the SO shows up at the funeral playing the grieving spouse routine, I just might smack her right in the chops!

Naw, I really wouldn't do that. And seriously, I think there are too many people in front of me on this line.

I just think this whole situation is horrible.

[begin_within]

12. What can you do about it?

[Lil Missy]

14. Not a god damn thing.

I suspect that may have been your point. Thank you, I think you're right.

[Book Lover]

15. I am sorry to hear about this loss

:hug:

[Lil Missy]

16. UPDATE. Just got the call.

It's done now. ;(

[Lil Missy]

17. PS. I gotta cheer my happy ass up somehow now. I'm meeting with friends later today.

A couple hours of sleep will surely help. And, my pets have not had their daily beatings today! (For the sarcasm imposed, it's like a daily bonding ritual. Like, love pats. They like it!)

Nothing like a tragedy to raise all the ugly demons in everyone else's life. Yesterday, I heard and watched someone relate D's dying, with losing a 7 week old kitten. To her, it trumped others mourning the loss of Donna, and their own family members. In some cases, due to murder or other tragic circumstances. She just cried and cried, and it was all about her.

I'm sorry, I love my pets too. And I'd be heartbroken to lose one. I did not know whether to laugh or cry. But please, don't tell me it trumps losing a loved one, especially in tragic circumstances.

I held my son for 18 hours one night, after an awful accident. I finally realized the inevitable, held him close, and told him it was okay to go, and mommy would help him. Hardest fucking thing I have ever done in my life. And I'd not like to have that compared to losing a damned 7 week old kitten!

I think I need to go finish a good cry now.

Thanks for listening.

[Lars39]

18. ~

:hug::hug::hug:

[Lil Missy]

19. Thank you.

But now I kinda feel like a clone, and a jerk.

Comparing one person's grief to another's is an unfair and a needless exercise, IMNSHO. Like comparing apples with oranges. Grief is a valid feeling, no matter what causes it.

Tragedy has a way of dragging up all the old ugly demons, and none of us are immune to that. I had a lapse, and I am normally much more reserved about my personal life.

Not too many people know much about me, and that is intentional. Just don't tell me my son's tragic accident and subsequent death was insignificant and not important. Amputate me at the fucking knees instead. It would hurt a lot less.

[darkstar]

20. ahhh...love... love....love....

hold tight...hold tight...love....

[Lil Missy]

22. Exactly right. I agree.

:hug:

[Heidi]

21. You are loved.

:hug: :hug: :hug: :hug:

:loveya:

[Lil Missy]

23. No I'm not.

But he was.

[Lorien]

26. I could never fault anyone for feeling a huge amount of grief over

anyone-human or animal. There's a saying; "grief is the purest evidence that we have loved and loved well". I'm very sorry that you have suffered so much loss, and sorry that Donna's mate has apparently not loved and loved well.

:hug:

[Lil Missy]

24. kick for the day crowd.

Perhaps I should just start a different thread. Since my angst has wandered off into a different direction now.

[Deja Q]

25. Damn.

Violence is not typically a good thing... I would certainly tie D's "partner" on a chair and do some basic discussion on what a real relationship is about.

Or maybe the railroad tracks instead.

[Lil Missy]

27. Violence is never an option, as far as I am concerned. I just won't go there.

Different thread now.

http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=view_all&address=105x8399470