Parents of camera-shy kids...

[redqueen]

How do you deal? I've resorted to begging my older daughter to smile for pics... she used to pose and ham it up. Stupid adolescence. x(

I was the same way though (except for the posing and hamming), so I guess it's only fair. :P

Anyone have any tips / tricks to coax out a smile once in a while? I have to either beg or be very, very sneaky.

[NJmaverick]

1. Get yourself a handy digital camera and look for the good candid shots

[redqueen]

2. I have one.

We take tons of pics. TONS. If she sees the camera is out, she nearly always goes immediately into 'serious face' mode. Or worse, 'grumpy, don't-you-dare mom' face.

The girls mostly just take pics of the cat, though.

[dembotoz]

3. candid shotsf

[Chan790]

4. Sometimes you can't. (An approach from a photophobic.)

My mother can't figure out how to get the pics out of the digital camera so I get to erase edit the ones I really hate. That works...offer a compromise. If she smiles for the camera, you'll let her destroy/erase the ones she hates before anybody else sees them. Most people are not photo-adverse, they're looking like crap in pictures that seems to hang around forever adverse. Alleviate that fear, get better pictures and happier photo models. (This has a downside for parents, there are no pictures of my college graduation because I had the worst pants ever and pink-eye and the right to annihilate all photographic evidence of both.)

Mothers have a bad habit of saving the worst pictures of their kids. I was a cute teenager but if you were to go my mother's photo collection, you'd think I looked like Kosmo Kramer. That's enough encouragement to never smile, let me tell you.

edit: Don't do the sneaky candid shots thing...if she's anything like me, she'll never leave the "don't you dare" face just in case the camera might come out. Also, it's kind of rude.

[redqueen]

6. Rude? How else am I supposed to get candid shots

if she throws her hand in front of her face when she sees me trying to get a pic?

[Chan790]

11. exactly...

you might not like it but you've got to accept that if you want quality photos you're going to have to meet her half-way. You can't get smiling happy photos of someone who is resolute to not be photographed. You've got to elicit her cooperation. Feel free to tell her all that...tell her you'll stop pushing to take her picture when she doesn't want to be photographed if she'll agree to be photographed sometimes on her terms.

I promise you that unless she has a massive self-esteem issue and hates her appearance, face or body (and if she does, that's really the bigger problem), she's not adverse to having a nice picture of herself. She's concerned about bad pictures. Really...who isn't. We've all got some terrible pics to live down. That's why I proposed the right of first-deletion.

I was so concerned of being candidly-photographed that I walked around with a permanent scowl from the age of 11-19 because my mother would not accept that I won't be photographed except on my terms...I've barely ever smiled since. My mother's second wedding album is filled with photos of the back of my head and photos where I'm sticking out my tongue or have both eyes closed or funny faces and one where I dropped my tuxedo pants. (She was ready to kill me for that.)

I too have a lot of pictures of my chin and the back of my hand and one eye peaking out from behind my pinky. Fifteen years later, it's still a bone of contention between us.

But someone else said and I agree...let her goof around with the camera. You'll get pictures of her, taken on her terms and she'll be smiling. Also, she might discover a talent...I'm much happier behind the camera than in front of it. A lot people are...the same thing that makes us want to be photographed at our best makes us great judges of a perfect photo.

[woo me with science]

8. Excellent answer.

We have the same deal with our daughter and have gotten some nice shots. :)

[redqueen]

9. She'd erase them all.

She's photo-averse. It's not that she thinks she looks like crap in some pics, she hates all of them equally. (Just like mom.)

It took me till my mid-20's to get over it...

[Maine-ah]

5. I let my daughter play with the camera for a little bit

now she hams it up. If yours is an expensive one, I wouldn't suggest it, but ours is a kodak digital and I'm not too worried about it.

[redqueen]

7. I let them take pics when they want...

she's not as fond of taking pics as the younger one.

[skygazer]

10. Don't take photos of them

I know that's not a satisfactory answer but as someone who hates camera and especially hated them as a kid, I understand how your daughter feels. And the more you beg, the more invasive and upsetting it seems.

Back off her a bit. Sure, you'll miss having photos of her at this age (though I think you'll probably end up with some - fewer than you'd like but some) but she'll appreciate it. And maybe with less pressure, she'll gradually decide she'd like to have some photos of herself.

Another thing I'd suggest is giving her a camera of her own, if she doesn't already have one, and asking her to take her own shots. Pretty much all cameras have timers and by giving her some control over it, she might loosen up also.