Your thoughts on long distance relationships?

[Mutley]

I've been talking to this guy I met elsewhere on the internets about six months ago. In the last few weeks we've been acting flirty and goofing around.

Last night, though, we talked for hours, about our lives and relationships and that sort of thing. He implied pretty heavily that he might be interested in more.

We only live about three hours away from one another, so it wouldn't be too difficult to see each other at least a few times a month. But I am a little stuck on the distance thing.

Could those of you who are in, or have had, long distance relationships tell me how you make it work, or why it didn't work? Anything that could shed enough light on this for me to decide would be cool. :P

[IndianaJones]

1. 3 hours isn't very long distance. go for it. nt.

[Runcible Spoon]

2. I would meet him as soon as you can to see if there is chemistry before you get in too deep...

there's no point in falling in love over the internet just to get that awkward moment when you meet and give that little "pat hug".

[Mutley]

8. That is a great idea.

I will bring it up and see what he says. I'm kinda nervous about it, though. :D

[Runcible Spoon]

3. dupeity dupe

[Runcible Spoon]

4. dupe

[LeftyMom]

5. Three hours isn't a long distance relationship. It's a mildly inconvenient relationship.

Twelve hours on airplanes is a long distance relationship. :(

[Mutley]

6. I thought of you and flvegan while I was typing that.

:(

One of you needs to move soon. :P

[LeftyMom]

12. Unfortunately that's not going to happen anytime soon.

:(

[Chovexani]

15. I swore I'd never do it again after 7 years with Australian boy.

Now I've got one in Canada and one in Milwaukee. One of these days we're all going to end up in the same spot. :P

[Tommy_Carcetti]

7. My wife and I were 4 hours apart when we first started dating.

We went to two different colleges.

Typically we'd see each other every two to three weeks. Usually we alternated on visits (at least after I got my car).

It wasn't that bad at all. In fact, it made our visits with each other seem even more special.

I think the rule of thumb is that if the person is within a day's drive, it shouldn't be considered a hinderance to a relationship.

[Mutley]

10. Yeah, I make the drive a third of the way to this guy at least once a month

to see my sister. He is probably less than an hour beyond that. Maybe it wouldn't be so bad. :)

[Tommy_Carcetti]

9. Dupe nt.

[Deep13]

11. When I lived in Toledo and Gizmonic lived in Cleveland...

...which is a two-hour ride, she came to see me almost every weekend. I had to work Saturday, so it was easier for her to come see me. She is a total Sweetie and I will always remember the effort she made during that two-year time. It was great when we finally move in together.

[harmonicon]

13. ugh..

I am in, and have mostly been in, long distance relationships. In the two cases (now, and the last girlfriend I had before now) that lasted multiple years, there were periods of a few months off and on where we lived together, or at least in the same. Both of these people were also friends of mine before we started dating, and we lived in the same place when the relationship started.

In the cases where I've had long distance relationships that didn't start as short distance relationships, it didn't go well or last very long. In one case it meant that I lost a really great friend I'd had for years. Of course each case is different, but I think it's not likely to work.

[Chovexani]

14. Three hours? LOL

Driving distance is not long distance, I'm sorry.

Get back to me when you've got several states and/or a border between you.

[Mutley]

22. Well, I've never been in a serious relationship with someone

who didn't live in the same town as me. So, it seems pretty normal that I'd be apprehensive about this. :shrug:

[Chovexani]

28. I just don't see it as that big a deal.

If you're really interested in the person and it's reciprocated, give it a shot. Just take the usual precautions when meeting someone online (meet in a public place, let someone know you're going, etc).

Sometimes people like to overcomplicate things. :)

[bigwillq]

16. I couldn't make it work but

others have. I say go for it and find out. :)

[Zomby Woof]

17. Does he hang around in malls?

If so, he could be a little shady. :P

[Mutley]

23. And where the hell have you been?

:P

[Zomby Woof]

26. Picking all the coins out of the food court fountain

With this rough economy, it's a great way to save money. :D

[Mutley]

27. Think of all the kids you're depriving

by stealing the change they were going to steal. x(

[BarenakedLady]

18. 3 hours is nothing. (n/t)

[meegbear]

19. Kinda doing that now ...

me in Boston and him in Las Vegas. We text a lot, that's for sure.

[billyoc]

20. Best thing ever. I'm in like 10 of them.

:evilgrin:

[Mutley]

25. ...

DU needs a :narrowseyes: smiley. :P

[Lucian]

21. Who cares what we think?

If you want to pursue a relationship with the guy, by all means, go for it. :)

Good luck. :) :hi:

[Mutley]

24. Just lookin' for input from people who've been there.

:D

Thanks. :hi:

[LostinVA]

29. I married mine over a year ago -- it was approximately 400 miles

Three hours is NOTHING. Three hours? We would have seen each other every weekend.

If it goes into a certain seriousness, someone has to move.

[Shakespeare]

33. Second that.

We went through almost a year of driving five and a half hours to see each other every other weekend. He moved down here (and in with me) almost three months ago. :woohoo:

If there's really something there, it's absolutely worth the inconvenience.

[terrya]

30. I've been in a long distance relationship for several years.

And I have to give an enormous amount of credit and thanks to my partner, IntravenousDemilo, for being so patient with me. The plan is for me to move up to Canada to be with him. I haven't yet. But he's been so patient and understanding. I guess that's called love.

It's hard, sometimes. But we love each other. We spend some time on the phone (sometimes we'll watch television shows together. It sounds silly. But we do.). And we see each other from time to time. But we plan on being together. That is a given. And that keeps everything in perspective.

Regarding your situation: go for it. Do it. In my opinion. :-)

[guitar man]

31. That's not that long of a distance

Back before I was married, I had a girlfriend in Tulsa and I was living in Lincoln, Nebraska. We got to physically see each other about once a month or so for about a year. The rest of the time, we were on the phone.

I can tell you this though, when we did manage to get together, the sex was really hot, you could light matches off of us! :P

[deepthought42]

32. My boyfriend & I are 3 1/2 hours away...

now granted we met in person when we lived about 15 min. away. But now we're both going to school in VA (he's in Fairfax, and I'm in Roanoke). It sucks that we don't get to see each other alot, but we both understand why and we see each other when we can and enjoy it. Plus there's phone, e-mail, snail mail... I think it depends on how dedicated each person is to the relationship as to whether or not it will work. If you both want it, it'll happen. :)

[semillama]

34. Before I got married, my wife and I were in a LDR

Me in Columbus, Ohio she in Atlanta, GA. For about 5 years. She'd spend her summers with me usually, and holidays, but other than that it was usually one weekend a month. I don't know if it would've worked without the help of instant messaging!

So, yeah, meet the guy, see if you click, and try it out.

[FarLeftRage]

35. Never worked for me

And the last one ended very tragically...

[DS1]

36. 3 whole hours!

:wow: