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A friend of mine who lives 1300 miles away from me is going through some financial problems. I met her on a dating site for the mentally ill. You may recall me talking about my illness here. She has the same diagnosis as me. We've been pen pals for 3 years and we have visited each other in the other's home towns a couple of times.
Considering what we've been through, we have both accomplished a lot in our lives. She became homeless when she became ill in her mid-twenties. She comes from a dysfunctional family and nobody would help her out with a place to stay. Since then she has gotten treatment, has gotten her college degree, has lived independently, and has held down a job for the last 10 years or so. Those are big accomplishments for those of us who have a severe mental illness and they are a source of pride and dignity. I think she is probably a stronger person than I am because I had my folks to fall back on when I became ill. I don't know what would have happened to me if I would have wound up on the streets.
She's worked two jobs off and on for about the last year, so I knew she was having financial problems for a while, but I didn't know how bad it was until just the other day when she confided in me that she was contemplating bankruptcy. I immediately went into chivalry mode and told her that I would help her if I can. I told her that no matter what the bill collectors are saying to her that she has to make that rent payment her number one priority. Everybody else can wait. She must have a roof over her head. I do not loan money to anybody now days because I've been burned a couple of times on that, but I did tell her that I would not let her go without meds. I think she can make her rent payment on time if she brushes off a couple of debtors. So between her and me she will have her home and her sanity. I'm kicking around what to do next. She hasn't asked for any help working out her finances, but I'm pretty good at that kind of stuff and I think I might be able to give her some good advice if I can get her to sit down with me and a calculator. But I haven't heard from her since I replied to her bankruptcy e-mail on Friday.
I'm worried about her. She usually writes to me every 2 or 3 days. It was 8 days before she wrote to me about her bankruptcy worries and in that same e-mail she said she was very depressed and shrinking away from everybody. I'm hoping that she'll write today. She doesn't have anybody on her side when things get tough and I'd hate to see this put her in the hospital.
I guess I just wanted to get that out there and maybe get your reaction. Bankruptcy law has changed and I'm thinking that I might be able to show her another way if I can get her to crunch the numbers with me. I hate seeing friends and loved ones in trouble or pain and my first reaction is always to try to help. I hope she reaches out to me.
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