If someone IRL consistently ignores you, do you wonder why?

[bertha katzenengel]

I have wondered about this woman. She never makes eye contact, never returns a greeting, and she just walked by and sneezed; I said 'bless you' and she said nothing.

Now: I at first I thought it was because she was just terribly shy, but I have since seen her talking and laughing with people.

Then I realized she was only doing that with other attorneys, so I wondered if it was a classist thing; I'm a mere secretary.

Sometimes I wonder if it's because I'm gay.

Sometimes I think of the fact that it doesn't matter.

Do you ever wonder about this in your own life?

[Fran Kubelik]

1. All the time.

:pals:

[La Lioness Priyanka]

2. yes, i do. i think its more a them type issue, than a priyanka type issue

you know what i mean?

i think something about them is broken, whatever it may be.

:hi:

[raccoon]

3. Yes, I do. One thing I do sometimes that helps me when this happens:

I say to myself 10 times:

"That is his/her stuff. It has nothing to do with me."

It helps me. :hug:

Have you heard about the bat yet?

[Zuiderelle]

4. It's something that used to bother me more. Now I laugh when it happens.

And think about how sad it is for someone to live in a world where they separate people into little buckets without even knowing them.

[zanne]

5. I know how you can find out.

Ask her. I know it sounds snarky, but I've wondered about people before and obssessed about it. I finally learned to just ask. It'a a real eye-opener.

[1gobluedem]

6. Yes

Cynic that I am, I believe it's because I don't have anything they want or at least that's what they think.

[RadiationTherapy]

7. No way! If anything, I am relieved.

I am not interested in people who aren't interested in me. I don't mean that arrogantly; I mean it practically.

I was secretary to the dean of our library for 4 plus years. I was furniture to anyone who didn't work here.

I don't have anything to say when someone 'blesses me' for sneezing. I most certainly don't say 'thank you'. Maybe a conciliatory grunt.

[FunkyLeprechaun]

8. Well... my mum HAD a "friend"

That just completely stopped talking to her and ignored her one day. My mum to this day doesn't know what she did to cause her "friend" to ignore her like that.

Her "friend" always says hello to me but not to my mum. It's been going on for 10 years!

[SeaLyons]

9. wow...do you acknowledge he/she when they say to hello

to you, or do you tell them to kiss your ass since they don't speak to your mother. I'd have a hard time being nice to someone that was dispicable to someone I loved.

[FunkyLeprechaun]

11. I don't acknowledge her

I haven't seen them for a while, rarely running into them even though we live a couple of blocks away from them.

I still hung out with their children a little bit eventually losing touch with them.

[SeaLyons]

10. For a minute there I thought you were talking about this board

because I usually feel like I'm on ignore around here....


:hide:

[hedgehog]

12. Pick up this book at your library:

Queen bees & wannabes : helping your daughter survive cliques, gossip, boyfriends, and other realities of adolescence

by Wiseman, Rosalind


or get a copy of the film "Mean Girls"


I haven't read this one

Mean girls grown up : adult women who are still queen bees, middle bees, and afraid-to-bees

Author: Dellasega, Cheryl.


but I just requested it from my library.

There are some really nasty women out there. It's not you , it's them.



Here's some armor for the next time you see her:

:hug:

[YellowRubberDuckie]

13. I do.

I'm fairly nice and friendly with everyone, but if I'm snubbed once, that person instantly no longer exists. If later on we have a conversation, I'm consistently friendly with them, but if someone doesn't know me and they snub me, I instantly don't care for that person.
If someone dislikes you solely based on the fact that your a secretary, they are not worth it. If it's because you are gay they are even more not worth it. There are so many better things to dislike about people than their occupation or who they happen to sleep with. I'm sorry you have to put up with that.
Duckie

[struggle4progress]

14. I find it a challenge! Just how pleasantly and how often can I greet them and still be ignored?

My record: something like two years of my daily friendly greetings unacknowledged by a partiocular coworker

Most people cave after the first five or six greetings

[redqueen]

16. I like that!

:)

[datasuspect]

15. it's a social class thing

she doesn't see you as a professional equal.

[redqueen]

17. Yeah.

Just recently I decided to stop saying hello to a neighbor because of this.

She was kind enough to warn me one night when there were tornados close by... and we chatted briefly then... but ever since then when I say hello she doesn't even make eye contact.

It weirds me out.

[Haole Girl]

18. I used to be bothered by things like that

Recently, though, I don't care... I really don't. And the weirdest part? I sort of like to be ignored by a lot of people at work.

I'm not sure if that's progress or not. Maybe I'm retreating. Who knows? Who cares?

[Ivan Sputnik]

19. It always puzzles me

when someone appears to dislike me for no reason that I can identify. I always wonder if I remind them of someone in their past who "did them wrong" or something. There's a woman at work, for example, who is nasty to me for no reason, and then acts surprised when I sometimes support her in meetings. But then, later, she's nasty again.... It makes no sense, unless she's decided I'm "just like HIM", based solely on my looks or something. Some people are very illogical in that way, and very quick to judge.