why I think batman is a dick, briefly

[cynatnite]

so, I keep getting into this argument with people* when I say, "I am a Superman fan," because INVARIABLY the response is, "Oh, I like Batman more. Superman's boring."

To which my response is, INVARIABLY, "Yeah, well, at least Superman didn't come up with lethal ways to kill all his friends or launch a spy satellite to track metahuman everything across the globe and then lose control of it or, oh yeah, BE A COMPLETE ASSHOLE."

And then the response is like, "Superman gave him the kryptonite!" and I'm all, "Yes, because SUPERMAN'S NOT AN ASSHOLE." And then they're all, "But what if superheroes go bad?"

And then I kind of flail at them and make this sound like a demented tea kettle and be all, "HE WON'T KILL A VILLAIN, BUT HE CAME UP WITH A PLAN TO LIGHT THE MARTIAN MANHUNTER ON FIRE."

And then they're all, "But what if heroes go bad? You have to have a way to take them out!" and I'm all, "What, Mr. I'm the goddamn Batman A Super Genius won't kill a villain like the goddamn Joker or the ninety million nutjob psycho killers he puts away and who keep escaping but he really, seriously, couldn't come up with a plan better than 'induce a grand mal seizure in the Flash at superspeeds!' and 'have Wondy fight someone until her heart gives out!' and 'let's just fuck with GL's head such that he BELIEVES HE IS BLIND' or 'hey, you know what sounds like fun good times? LIGHTING THE MARTIAN MANHUNTER ON FIRE' or 'let me just render Superman's skin invisible so he's tormented by the sun! AWESOME!'"

Look. I wouldn't care about it if Batman, you know, killed some villains because it was expedient. But you don't get to tell me that the ONLY POSSIBLE WAY he could come up with incapacitating his FRIENDS is to kill them and have me like the man. Like, okay, seriously, Batman killing Superman via kryptonite? Gets a pass from me because Superman set that up. He gave Bats the kryptonite himself. But the rest of them didn't. And while I'm totally all for having the contingency plans in place, you don't get to make them lethal, spy on all the metahumans IN THE WORLD, and then be a dick about your own privacy or when people call you on your bullshit or when Wondy kills a dude because he had, you know, hypnotized Superman.

to read a little more...

http://mimesere.livejournal.com/813940.html?style=mine

[nomorenomore08]

1. And really, how much of a superhero can he be, if THIS GUY whupped his ass?

[Magrittes Pipe]

8. Yay! Wesley!

:bounce:

[Shell Beau]

2. Yeah

and all that

[DarkTirade]

3. Hey, nobody's perfect. :P

Seriously though... he's wants to prevent a 'might makes right' situation when the might is on the wrong side... but how do you do that without resorting to using might yourself? Thent here's always the chance that he could misuse it, or someone could take advantage of the systems he's set up.

Bottom line is: he's a man with some very obvious flaws. But he still does the best he can to do the best thing for everyone. Not even just the innocent: EVERYONE. That's not easy to do. Especially for a man with no superpowers.

[mikeytherat]

4. Actually, I believe Superman to reign Dick Supreme.

www.superdickery.com

mikey_the_rat

[democracyindanger]

5. Proof

that batman is a dick, but it doesn't preclude Superman from being one too.

[redqueen]

6. Spider man is better than them, so it doesn't matter which of those two is better.

:P

[PeaceNikki]

7. Mother fucker leaves streaks EVERY time!

:mad:

[ghostsofgiants]

9. Batman doesn't actually have any super powers.

What the fuck is THAT?