"To clear paper jam, read instructions inside front door"

[MonkeyFunk]

how the fuck do you open the front door?

[flvegan]

1. Crowbar.

[Oeditpus Rex]

2. That instruction is with the instructions

for clearing paper jams.



Good luck. :)

[Critters2]

3. Like this:

http://youtube.com/watch?v=T6syezOHJ2Q

[Maddy McCall]

4. Easy.

Go get the admin assistant to do it.

:P

[MonkeyFunk]

6. What, and look stupid in front of her?

No, I'd rather ask you guys.


Actually, I managed to get the front door open. Inside was a card full of pictures, like how to escape a burning plane. Only this looked more like how to escape 6 burning planes if you were in a straightjacket, and half the planes were underwater, with burning sharks attacking it.

So I jiggled some things, closed the door, and went back to my cube and found another printer. Let the next guy figure it out.

[Maddy McCall]

7. LOL...that works for me....

also a good strategy when the damn thing runs out of paper.

[Critters2]

8. Please. My assistant is probably surprised I can walk across the room

without her help. She's polite about it, but I just know she's thinking "...and they gave her a Master's degree?!".

[Midlodemocrat]

21. LOL. My brother, who is a VP at our company

couldn't figure out how to conference people into a call we were having many moons ago. We literally had to wait until his assistant got there to do it.


I still give him a hard time about that. :rofl:

[MissMillie]

23. s/he is obviously deserving of a raise

actually, do her/him a big favor, ask for help.

I know I'd rather help clear the jam now then go to use the machine for a quick copy (that I need in a hurry) and see that someone left it jammed.

[mainegreen]

5. The front door is actually a fake.

Use the side door.

It's a bored engineers idea of a cruel joke.

[MichiganVote]

9. You call the secretary silly

[MonkeyFunk]

10. If I called her silly

wouldn't she be insulted? :shrug:

[MichiganVote]

11. If she calls you by your first name, you're safe. If not...well..good luck

Never, ever, mess with secretaries.

[MonkeyFunk]

13. oh fuck no

I learned that a LOOOONG time ago. I'm more deferential to admins than to their bosses. The admins can fuck me up worse.

[MichiganVote]

16. But if they love you...you're in heaven.

[Shakespeare]

12. Paper jams make me feel like this guy:

[MonkeyFunk]

14. I wanted to be that guy on the person who MADE the document

I needed to print.

Who the fuck puts vital information in a full-color 195 page document on 17x11 paper?!

[Shakespeare]

17. 11x17? That's a murderable offense.

Bleah. x(

[kentauros]

22. That's about all I print in...

then again, I'm printing maps, alignment sheets, routes and attribute tables from ArcMap :P

At least, I do print in that format when Acrobat decides it's a good idea to include the background aerial images in my drawings...

[kentauros]

15. Here ya go: the REAL instructions

:P

"PC Load Letter? WTF does that mean?!"

[terrya]

18. That sounds like the HP9000 printer at work.

God, I hate clearing paper jams from that thing. :grr:

[asteroid2003QQ47]

19. You do what every blue collar would do.

FUBAR it! The new replacement will likely function
better, for a while at least.

[1]

20. "pc load letter? what the fuck does that mean?" :) n/t.