On my bag of bread: "Guaranteed Taste."

[LaraMN]

That doesn't even mean ANYTHING.

Guaranteed to taste like what? Guaranteed to have *a* taste? Everything has *a* taste. That's not a selling point.

Whatever, Sara Lee. You're a dumbshit.

I have a final to study for, but this is really important.

x(
:crazy:

[Ellen Forradalom]

1. "Stops coughing by its antitussive action!"

i.e. stops coughing by stopping coughing.

Favorite line from a commercial, ever.

[Chan790]

3. Mine was:

"Do not operate heavy machinery after taking AmBien."

:wtf: I think someone misunderstood what the AmBien was for? :shrug:

[LaraMN]

4. Bwahaha! Awesome!

:rofl:

[skygazer]

2. I was sitting in a laundromat once and saw a box of hangers

The slogan on the box was, "A better hanger for every occasion."

Which got me thinking - is it considered an occasion when we use a hanger? And what constitutes a "better" hanger? I mean, these were plain wire hangers - what the hell was so special about them?

Meaningless phrases for people like us to scratch our heads and say :wtf: about. :P

[LaraMN]

5. I am completely at a loss to explain that one, as well.

Although metal hangers are good for jimmying your locks when you shut your keys in the car; that would be a unique occasion...

[cloudbase]

6. Why do they make dry cat food in the shape of fish?

As if that four-legged vacuum of mine cares.

[Oeditpus Rex]

7. Perhaps they meant 'Guaranteed flavor'

which is still ambiguous.

"Taste" is a sense. "Flavor" is a sensation.

I don't think they can promise that eating their bread will give you taste.









—Herr Grammar Überhauptsturmbannführer