I've spent too much time in the Monkey House (GD:P)...and I'm in a foul mood anyway.

[Danger Mouse]

Anybody got any good jokes/funny stories to put a smile on the face of a bitter asshole like myself?

[DarkTirade]

1. I have a surrealist joke.

Why did the cheese?

Because the monkey was blue.

[Danger Mouse]

4. lol.

i get it!
...not.

[SPKrazy]

2. Well Donald Rumsfield Was Giving A Press Briefing

and he said "3 Brazilian soldiers were killed in fighting in Iraq recently. GWB sitting behind him looked somber and nodded his head. After a bit he leaned over to Condi and said "how many is a Brazilian"?

An afterword on this to make it funny again: I told this to my son months ago and he I guess concluded that a Brazilian was in fact a number less than infinity, but a very large number. He started soccer last week and the coach of the league is a Brazilian. He comes up to me and says, "dad, he's a Brazilian", I said "yes he is SPK Jr.", he started laughing "a Brazilian, he he he, how many is that dad?"

:rofl::rofl::rofl:

[Danger Mouse]

6. i was hoping someone would do me the honor...

of posting that timeless classic in one of my threads. :cry:

[SPKrazy]

7. but the afterword is what I like :D

[Danger Mouse]

10. had to explain it to my little sister, too.

:hi:

[lost-in-nj]

3. oh hon

I have Achmed
the dead terrorist!!!
http://youtube.com/watch?v=1uwOL4rB-go

and this

:hug:


lost

[Danger Mouse]

9. achmed's always good for a laugh.

:hug:

[bicentennial_baby]

5. John Kerry walks into a bar...and the bartender says

why the long face?

:P

[Danger Mouse]

8. tell that one in GD: P, add a lot of profanity and grammatical errors...

and the hillary supporters will love it!
:argh:

[bicentennial_baby]

17. Did you not like it?

:pals:

:)

[Warren Stupidity]

11. This morning I joined the 'let it sink' camp.

And suddenly GDP become devoid of awful over the top rightwing smear posts :-)

[Danger Mouse]

12. but didn't you hear? the 'let it sink' campaign is proof that Obama is finished!!!

:cry:

[Warren Stupidity]

13. I don't hear any of it anymore

ignorance is bliss.

[Danger Mouse]

14. but that means we want an echo chamber!!!!!!11111one

come on, you know you love it.

[Fire Walk With Me]

15. Here's a beautiful song to ease your spirit.

http://youtube.com/watch?v=EXBaI3-_4nM

[laconicsax]

16. Amazing!

[Danger Mouse]

21. you're right...i feel oddly at peace now...

:crazy:
:pals:
that was brillaint!

[Manifestor_of_Light]

23. That video was filmed in downtown Houston.

The first dancing shot is the columns and dome on top of the Neils Esperson Building, which is a 1920s Art Deco masterpiece. The building next to it on the same block is the Mellie Esperson Building. They were husband and wife.

The Water Wall is in a park near the Transco Tower on the west side of town, near The Galleria. I think now it's called Williams Tower. It's a 62 story mirrored Art Deco style building, built in the 1980s.

The pool with the chrome columns is Tranquility Park, between City Hall and the Federal Courthouse.

The pool the girl actually swims in at the end, with the rock waterfall, is a private pool.

[bridgit]

18. That place is *all about* foul moods...stinky ones too...

[Danger Mouse]

19. that is 100% appropriate for GD:P. definitely.

approved.
:thumbsup:

[tammywammy]

20. Here's a funny video

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MC--VwYTHAM

[BlueDissenter]

22. A funny story

When my oldest niece was about four she was playing with friend of hers. 'Kate' said they should play Jesus or something along those lines. 'Kate' said she'd be Jesus to which 'Maggie' replied if your Jesus, then I'm god.

John McCain as a LOLcat:

[Wetzelbill]

24. Why did the Easter Bunny hide his eggs?

Because he didn't want people to know he was fucking the chicken. :)

Of all things I heard that from an adult film actress.