I am afraid I have drained all my resources.

[sicksicksick_N_tired]

I am so damn tired.

Today is the first day,...I just did NOT want to get out of bed. I pulled the covers over my head.

:boring:

Being asleep and imagining a lovely dream relieving me from the pain of life seemed so much better. Then, I remembered the times I neglected the everyday duties I do. It only takes a couple days for a home to turn into a dump.

But, why the fuck should I care? Apparently, lots of people don't care about "home", anymore,...no one cares to invest in making "this" a,...a happy and loving space.

:spank:

I just caught myself diverting from WHAT is making me so tired. Focusing upon "making a home" has been one of the resources that has kept me going,...and,...that particular resource, among the others I've utilized, isn't working for me, anymore.

I was restructured into unemployment. I am a single parent. I've been unemployed for 19 months, now. Within that time, two immediate family members (my sister and my father) have been diagnosed with cancer. I also have a child with perpetual difficulties "fitting in" to the education authority. I've applied for every job available and exercised my every resource.

Life is so much bigger than me. I thought I could handle ANYTHING. Maybe, I still can,..but, I am tired of this shit.

Now, I feel like :nopity:

:cry: :cry: :cry:

[LibraLiz1973]

1. Hey!!!

We've ALL been there- believe me. Sounds trite, but, things really do get better.
Hang on

[sicksicksick_N_tired]

2. If so, I don't hear about it.

Not that I expect to,...since, I only share it with strangers on a "lounge" function in an internet politico-board.

I lie. I do have one friend with whom I share such struggles.

[Jack Sprat]

3. You know something?

I know it's a struggle and you feel alone and like nobody else cares. People are all over the place in similar circumstances as you. You just don't know how many and where they are. But they are all around you and in the same frame of mind, if not worse. There needs to be a support group for people out of work and depressed, just like a branch of AA or something like that. I hope that you wake up tomorrow morning and think positron thoughts like, "this is my only life and I want to live it free of pain and sorrow". "I'm going to try."

[grasswire]

4. this may seem simplistic...

...but it sounds as if you need some "constant caregiver" relief. How old are your kids? Could you get some respite by trading time with another single parent? Could you share a home with another single mom, share expenses and responsibilities so that you both have some support and companionship?

People are going to double up more and more in order to survive the economy. Here's a pat on your back, Mom. The world does not ignore your sacrifice.

[GreenPartyVoter]

5. I am so sorry *hugs* I have been through some of that too. I wish I could

give you advice but my tendency is to hide under the blankets and/or eat until I can't feel anything anymore. :(

I kinda feel like this on some days

[sicksicksick_N_tired]

6. Made me smile!

:-)

Thank YOU!!!

[GreenPartyVoter]

8. It was karma! I searched all over IHC for that thing and couldn't find it. Hit "random" and

it popped up on my 2nd try. :P

[Zoigal]

7. Sending you a big

:hug: Your dad, sister and kid all need you. Hang in there. z