"He said 'I haven't had a bite all week' so I bit him." Post your FAVORITE bad joke HERE.

[Amerigo Vespucci]

Go ahead...Rodney would have wanted it that way.



:toast:

[Rabrrrrrr]

1. I said to the doc, "I need a second opinion." He said, "Okay, you're ugly, too".

:rofl:

[Manifestor_of_Light]

2. Two lions walk into a bar.

One of them asks for a beer.

The barmaid says, "I'm sorry, but we don't serve lions".

One of the lions jumps over the bar and eats her.

Later, he get gets sleepy. The other lion says, "It must have been the bar bitch you ate".

==============

A man's wife has a heart attack. She goes to the hospital.

The doctor comes out and says, "I'm sorry, but your wife has acute angina".

And the husband says, "Well, she's got a pretty face too".



:rofl:

[Amerigo Vespucci]

16. Oh yeah...those are BAD.

:rofl:

[jgraz]

3. President George W Bush

[enigmatic]

4. 2

A three legged dog walks into a saloon.

The bartender says, "hey dog, what are you doing in here!"

The dog looks at the bartender and says, "I'm looking for the man who shot my paw..."

****

Did you hear the one about the constipated mathematician? He worked it out with a pencil...

[BlueIris]

20. That second one is TERRIBLE.

And amazingly, I've never heard that before. I'ma stealin' it...

[TreasonousBastard]

5. Duck walks into a store...

"Got any duck food?"

"No."

Next day, duck comes back to store.

"Got any duck food?"

"No."

This goes on for a week, until the store owner yells, "You come back here again asking for duck food and I'm gonna nail your nasty little webbed feet to the floor!"

Next day, the duck comes back right on schedule and asks "Got any nails?"

"No."

"OK, got any duck food?"

[enigmatic]

7. THAT'S funny!

:rofl:

[Amerigo Vespucci]

17. That's a truly GREAT bad joke.

:toast:

:rofl:

[quiet.american]

31. That is funny! nt

[TreasonousBastard]

6. Skeleton walks into a bar...

"Gimme a beer and a mop."

[Hand]

27. ...

:spray:

That's a new one on me! :rofl:

[TreasonousBastard]

8. A priest, a rabbi, and a Baptist minister walk into a bar...

bartender says, "Is this a joke?"

[Reverend_Smitty]

9. A man walks into a bar...

OUCH!!!

[zabet]

10. What do you call

a Jamaican Proctologist?





A Pokemon.


:evilgrin:

[joshcryer]

11. Two parrots are sitting on a perch.

One says to the other "I love fish."

[Heidi]

12. How many surrealists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two: one to hold the giraffe and one to fill the bathtub with brightly-colored machine tools.

[krispos42]

13. A guy's at the doctor's office...

and the doc asks him to describe his sex life.

The guy says "Infrequently".

The doc replies "Is that one word or two?"


:-)

[Dr. Strange]

14. pfftt!

:spray:

That reminds me of the joke about the evolution of married couples' sex lives:
tri-weekly
try weekly
try weakly

[krispos42]

29. LOL n/t

[Iggo]

15. Alligator gets cut in half.

Front half says to the back half, "I'm going to Africa. How 'bout you?"

Back half says, "pfffft..."

[EstimatedProphet]

32. .

:rofl:

[bif]

18. What did the motorist say to the one-legged hitchhiker?

"Hop in!"

[bif]

19. A priest, a drun, and a pedophile walk into a bar...

And that's just the first guy!

[BOSSHOG]

21. What do you call a pig in a pawn shop?

A Ham Hock!!!

[meegbear]

22. Guy goes to the doctor and says "It hurts when I do this" ...

so the doctor says "Then don't do that".

[meegbear]

23. So a dyslexic guy walks into a bra

[Sabriel]

24. A guy comes back from the doctor...

..with a spiffy brand-new 3-piece suit and an expensive hair cut and manicure. His wife says, "What's the deal with the new look?"

The guy says, "The doctor says I'm impotent. If I'm impotent, I figure I better dress impotent, too."

[BlueJazz]

25. What is long, brown, and Sticky ??

...a Stick

[cloudbase]

26. There's nothing wrong with marriage as an institution.

But who wants to be committed to an institution?

[racaulk]

28. Why don't anteaters ever get sick?

Because they're full of antibodies.

(anty-bodies)

:rofl:

[SCantiGOP]

30. Horse walks into a bar

The bartender says, "Hey, why the long face?"

[Inchworm]

33. Skeleton walks into a bar...

says, "Barkeep! Gimme a beer and a mop!"

:yoiks: