So. Mike Huckabee.
1. You look like Kevin Spacey. That makes you appealing.
2. You have a bunch of experience governing Arkansas. Normally I forget Arkansas exists, but since my pal Bill Clinton also governed your state, you earn some points.
3. You wore a ridiculous powder blue suit for your wedding. I know it was the 70's, but seriously? Still, it kind of earns you points, for sheer balls.
4. You seem to agree with me on a number of things. This strikes me as odd considering you are a member of the Christian Right and I am basically your polar opposite. But you are against racism, you aren't afraid to raise taxes when necessary, you support health care for low-income kids, and you're tough on big business.
Ok, so we've established why you're not such a bad guy. But there are a few things that worry me.
1. This whole business of believing God is leading you to the presidency. Doesn't our current President think that too? And didn't he fuck things up?
2. You're not just a religious man, you're a former pastor. You believe the Bible is inerrant. That's fine; do what you like. But is it really appropriate to have someone like you be the leader of our (supposedly secular) country?
3. I've heard rumors that you're petty and thin-skinned. We don't really need another President who wants to use his power to exact revenge on his enemies.
4. You're a Republican. Just out of principle this is working against you.
So what it really boils down to is:
I think that you're kind of cute
and you wore a ridiculous suit.
You think the Bible's inerrant
So I think it's apparent
That for me the point is now moot!
Ok, that was lame. But what else do I have to do all day but come up with limericks about presidential candidates!
Consider:
Romney's a long shot at best
Except for in Utah, I guess
Gay marriage, abortion,
these are only a portion
of the issues he's flipped on, no jest!
It gets worse:
Obama's got troubles, it's true
Some argue that he's just too new
For some he's too black
For some, his black lacks
But I think he's adorable too.
(clearly, I judge pols on looks!)
and finally:
Clinton is tough competition
Watch out! 'Cause she's on a mission
She's tougher than nails
She always prevails
She's an experienced, shrewd politician.
Ok, I'm done.
I'm :rofl: over here... got any of your own to add? I think hers are pretty damn funny!