This not seeing my son

[SPKrazy]

every day

fucking sucks

that's all

I watched him play the angel Gabriel in a church thing this morning.

Then I went home.

He watched me leave.

It kills me that he misses me...

[UndertheOcean]

1. custody battle with ex?

sorry about that

[SPKrazy]

2. no

just not in the same household

yes it could be much worse

i know that

i'm grateful its not

[ThomCat]

3. I'm very sorry. That sounds heartbreaking.

:(

I hope he's a good kid, and I hope you can build a strong relationship with him despite living apart.

[SPKrazy]

7. he's an awesome kid

i hope so too

[SallyMander]

4. That must be hard

but so much worse if he DIDN'T miss you!

I'm sure he was glad you were there. :hug:

[SPKrazy]

5. me too

it just made me so sad to go

he was so happy to see me

[SallyMander]

9. That means you're a great dad SPK

I hope it all works out -- sorry you're sad :(

:hug:

[SPKrazy]

21. thanks

I'm better now of course :P

:hug:

[Madrone]

6. I watched a man I dated for 2 years go through a BRUTAL

battle with a NPD (narcissistic personality disorder) ex over his son. Gave me a WHOLE new perspective on the screwing of fathers by the system. You have my heartfelt sympathy and understanding. :hug:

[SPKrazy]

8. thanks

though it isn't that kind of situation at all

[Madrone]

10. I know.

But I still know what it's like for a DEVOTED father to have to say goodbye and go home to an empty house. Something I never fully understood until my involvement in that relationship.

[SPKrazy]

22. Thanks Madrone

:hug:

[Gormy Cuss]

11. ..

:hug:
Haven't been there as a parent but I was as the kid, and yes it fucking sucks all the way around especially in the first year or two. After that it becomes the new normal and while it still sucks it's not quite as painful.

[SPKrazy]

16. Thanks

:hug:

[lildreamer316]

12. Hey.

:hug: :hug: :hug: :hug:
send a couple of those to him...

[SPKrazy]

17. I will

:hug: :hug:

[CaliforniaPeggy]

13. My dear Southpawkicker...

I am so sorry you're hurting so much, sweetie...

And that your son is too...

Hugs for you both...:hug: :hug:

[SPKrazy]

18. Thanks Peg

:hug: :hug:

[KitchenWitch]

14. I know exactly how that feels

I get to actually see my son only a few times a year right now.

:cry:

I know it is for the best but damn, it hurts.

[SPKrazy]

19. I know you do

:hug: :hug:

that must be really hard

[Maestro]

15. Sorry to hear.

I wish it could be better for you both.

[SPKrazy]

20. Thanks

it's not terrible, it just sucks

:hi:

[RetroLounge]

23. I feel your pain...

and know exactly what you are going thru...

:hug:

RL

[SPKrazy]

24. yeah

you do

:hug:

thanks

[Midlodemocrat]

25. I'm sorry, SPK. I can't imagine how hard that must be.

I feel sorry for my husband when he travels for work because he doesn't see the kids. I can't imagine the depth of pain non custodial parents face.

:hug:

[SPKrazy]

26. thanks

:hug:

[Breeze54]

27. Your post made

my eyes well up with tears... I went through a nasty custody battle and... ugh :(
I had them with me forever and then he had them and wouldn't give them back and
I cried my eyes out all the time. But when they became adults? They said, I mean,
they expressed empathy with me and forgave me and my ex for all the bs and said
they didn't really remember it all. I hope they aren't lying about that and I feel
secure now (sort of) that they aren't lying or scarred but I will always wonder. :(
Although they do seem to be very happy and well adjusted adults but the times I
didn't get to see them killed me a little each day. I'm really glad you got to go
to the event and see your child. :hug:

[SPKrazy]

28. thanks

and sorry you went through all that

:hug: :hug:

[lost-in-nj]

29. Sorry your sad....

:hug: :loveya:

hope you feel better soon......
weekends suck.....

lost

[SPKrazy]

30. i do feel better

thanks

:hug:

:loveya:

yeah

weekends suck in lots of ways

but hey

there's always tomorrow- back to work with Dr. Strangelove :eyes:

[VenusRising]

31. I'm sure it means a lot to him that you went to his program.

I know that when I wasn't with my Dad it meant so much to me when he would come to my activities or come to school for lunch.

You're a great dad, and I know you're going to be there for him come what may.

I'm sorry that it hurts, but it's only because you love him so much.

:hug::loveya:

[SPKrazy]

32. its seeing him

look sad too

:cry:

:hug: :hug:

[VenusRising]

33. I'm sorry, sweetie.

:hug:

[SPKrazy]

34. me too

[Gonzo Gardener]

35. Awe...

come here, gimme a hug. :hug:

It does suck. I have two old friends who divorced three years ago. I've been watching them both go through this. They share the 3 kids well and the divorce was fairly amicable. She said, "I don't even feel like a whole person when the kids aren't with me". I pointed out that prior to the breakup/separation that the home environment was tense and that the bad feelings kept anyone from enjoying 'family time'. I encouraged her to focus on getting her projects taken care of when the kids were with dad so that her time with them could be used better... as pure quality time. She has adjusted to the time apart and the kids have adapted beautifully.

It's gonna be ok, really. I know it's lonely when you don't have someone to go home to, but it will get easier. My best advice is the same as it was for my gf... try to focus on getting the mundane daily life stuff (work, errands, etc...)out of the way while you're separated so that you can completely focus on your son when he's with you.

[SPKrazy]

36. thanks

:hug:

good advice

[femmocrat]

37. I'm sorry, SPK.

:cry: I bet he was a beautiful angel Gabriel.

:hug:

[SPKrazy]

40. he was

:hug:

thanks

[skygazer]

38. I'm so sorry, Pawpicker

:hug:

I've seen my son once since he was 11. He'll be 20 on the 31st. :cry:

He knows I love him and I know he loves me. But god damn it, it's hard. :(

[SPKrazy]

39. damn

i feel like i got no probs

:hug:

[skygazer]

41. No, no, no

That wasn't meant as a "how do you think I feel?" comment. Pain of any sort is valid and hard. I'm just saying I can relate. :hug:

You're a good dad, my friend. :hug:

[SPKrazy]

44. no i didn't take it that way

i was just thinking that i see my son

anyway

thanks

:hug:

[ulysses]

42. that does suck.

I'm sorry. How old is he?

[SPKrazy]

45. he's 7

:hi:

[ulysses]

51. god.

I can't imagine. Peace and strength to you both.

[TK421]

43. I'm sorry, dude... I'm not sure what to say here, not having kids

but that has to be rough.....at least he knew you were there. As far as the part where he misses you,..I can't say anything at all. I wish I could say something, but I just can't. I hope you get more time with him, and I'm not quite sure what the situation is with you and the time you get to have with him, I won't press you on that...I just don't know, and I've never asked. I wish you would fill me in a bit, though

[SPKrazy]

46. thanks TK

I see him every other weekend, on Wednesdays, and lately I've been going to cub scouts with him on Tuesdays.

this wasn't my weekend

I hadn't seen him since last Wednesday

:hi:

[TK421]

48. Check your PM

[SPKrazy]

50. Okay

thanks

[AlCzervik]

47. i'm sad for both of you.

but i have to tell you that your son knows how much you love him and how much you miss him, not every kid has that, maybe thats one good thing that will come from all of this.

[SPKrazy]

49. thanks

:hug:

[ScreamingMeemie]

52. But...he knows you will come back... he knows he will get to see

you again. Hold on to that. I watch a little boy cry himself to sleep missing a man he will never see again. I'm so sorry you have to deal with that SP.

[SPKrazy]

53. i'm sorry for what you and your family are dealing with

Mrs. G

:hug:

very sorry

[Bullwinkle925]

54. I hear you SPK . . .

It totally sucks that you have to live apart from him. He knows, though, that you do love him and he certainly appreciates your involvement in his life.
He may not be able to express that at this time, but he will.
Savor every precious moment that you have with him.
You're a good Dad.
BW925

[SPKrazy]

55. thanks

:hug:

[crim son]

56. I guess I'm on the other side of the equation.

I know my boys really miss their father and I feel terribly guilty about it. If the situation was reversed and I didn't have the kids though, I'd be miserable. So sorry, Pawpicker. :hug: :loveya: :hug:

[Fire Walk With Me]

57. I hope that everything works out for the best for everyone involved!

:hug: