Christ. Now that Redstone, pawpicker and SA have gone to bed

[crim son]

I just wrote something nasty to the ex. Fuck me. I wish I hadn't but I did. Worse, there is no wine to soothe my furrowed brow.

Why in gawd's green earth did I do this? A: Because he makes me feel like nobody will ever love me again, and i want him to know how awful that feels.

No matter: I don't believe the message was convincingly conveyed.

on edit: in case you don't think I'm feeling bad, let me tell you I'm eating three organic avocados with blue cheese. Take that, you fat, ugly, useless, old and clearly redundant beast of a woman.

[SeattleGirl]

1. Uh oh, they forgot to put you back in your special room.

:P


PS: Sorry you're not having a good evening. :hug:

[crim son]

3. They put me there, but I escaped to the kitchen. n/t

[SeattleGirl]

5. You're a crafty one, you are!

Want me to send over some wine?

[crim son]

9. Nah, I had two glasses.

I do thank you for the offer, SeattleGirl! I have a host of women to deal with tomorrow a.m. and must be a baking fool by seven. Bah! :hi:

[CaliforniaPeggy]

2. My dear crim son...

I'm sorry sweetie.......

It's no fun when your partners in crime all vanish, is it?

I'm sorry you're feeling so sad and awful........

Wish I could help make it go away...:hug:

[Redstone]

4. Ahem. I'm still awake. And I want you to listen to me: Do NOT do this to yourself. I walked that

very same self-destructive path in a prior divorce, and I am asking...nay, I am BEGGING you: Do NOT do this to yourself.

The most important lesson I learned from my wonderful counselor during my hideous divorce was this one thing she said to me: "Just because someone else does something bad to you, that does NOT make YOU a bad person."

It sounds as if you're at a crisis point. Read that sentence above, and repeat it to yourself as needed. And get over the phone phobia, and call anyone who can help you when you need to.

You are not alone.

Redstone

[crim son]

10. It doesn't matter if you're a bad person

if events tend toward assuming you are. You found Mrs. Redstone and for that I'm glad, truly glad. Inevitable self-pity aside, I'm a strange character and I miss the one person who seemed to like me.

I thought surely you'd gone to bed. Pay no attention because I am utterly hopeless and unlike most sensible people, I don't keep this shit to myself. I can't any more. I'm bursting at the seams.

[Redstone]

16. You are NOT hopeless. Not as long as you have me on your side. Remember that, and get some

sleep, will you? Sleep is the great healer, and I'm about to go get some of that myself.

Redstone

[crim son]

17. Goodnight.

As I've told pawpicker, I stay awake imagining that if I do, something will happen. Something that will change my life for the better. For the perfect!

[Starbucks Anarchist]

6. I'm still awake!

:hi:

[crim son]

11. You said you were going to bed.

I will now pretend you have.

[Starbucks Anarchist]

13. Yeah, I should go to bed now.

Fucking work tomorrow -- today, if you think about it.

Good night! :hug: :hug:

[crim son]

15. I never think about that shit SA.

My mind is full of bullshit and reality never touches me.

:hug:

[petronius]

7. Writing nasty things to people who hurt you is not wrong

It may not be particularly productive, but it's not going to make things worse. It's easy for me to be glib about the life of someone across the country who I don't really know, but I don't think there's any reason to beat yourself up...

Not having any wine in the house is a serious crime, however - but I think we can give you a pass this once...

[crim son]

12. I'm furious at myself too.

There is vodka of course but I don't want to behave as though I've lost all my faculties. Again. Again, again, again.

I swear to you, petronius, I was at one time normal. heh.

[petronius]

18. You've always sounded pretty darn 'normal' to me

(Whatever 'normal' really means.) I don't have a complete idea of what your situation is, but it seems clear that you've had some pretty rough times lately. Still, it's obvious from your posts that you're a very cool person, and things will get better for you. When it comes to little things like inadvised e-mails or failure to stop at the liquor store, the only thing to say is FIDO - Fuck It, Drive On...

[fizzgig]

8. that sounds like a tasty snack

i'm sorry you're feeling down :hug:

[crim son]

14. I'm feeling totally high, kagehime.

He never allowed me to tell him what I truly thought about his doing what he did. It ended my marriage so he could save his and as awfully as I behaved, as evil and horrible and detestable, I would not have done it had there been anything left of my marriage to ruin. He

Ah. Forget it.