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seemunkee Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Mar-24-07 03:28 PM
Original message
Living Will
I think I'll use this for mine:

I, ____________, being of sound mind and body, do not wish to be kept alive indefinitely by artificial means.

Under no circumstance should my fate be put in the hands of peckerwood ethically challenged politicians who couldn’t pass ninth-grade biology if their lives depended on it.

If a reasonable amount of time passes and I fail to sit up and ask for a cold beer, it should be presumed that I won’t ever get better. When such a determination is reached, I hereby instruct my spouse, children, and attending physicians to pull the plug, reel in the tubes and call it a day.

Under no circumstance shall the hypocritical members of the Legislature (State or Federal) enact a special law to keep me on life-support machinery. It is my wish that these boneheads mind their own damn business, and pay attention instead to the health, education, and future of millions of Americans who aren’t in a permanent coma. Under no circumstance shall any politicians butt into this case. I don’t care how many fundamentalist votes they’re trying to scrounge for their run for the presidency, it is my wish that they play politics with someone else’s life and leave me alone to die in peace.

I couldn’t care less if a hundred religious zealots send e-mails to legislators in which they pretend to care about me. I don’t know these people and I certainly haven’t authorized them to preach and crusade on my behalf. They should mind their own damn business too.

If any of my family goes against my wishes and turns my case into a political cause, I hereby promise to come back from the grave and make his or her existence a living hell.

Signature ________________
Date ___________

Witness ______________
Date _____________
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KitchenWitch Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Mar-24-07 03:37 PM
Response to Original message
1. Brilliant!`
:applause:
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GoneOffShore Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Mar-24-07 04:49 PM
Response to Original message
2. I've got a living will
Edited on Sat Mar-24-07 04:50 PM by GoneOffShore
But I'd use yours as an adjunct with a couple of emendations, like changing the beer to wine and adding a line about hot looking nurses walking past my bed.

:rofl:
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