If something is posted publicly

[GirlinContempt]

on an open, internet message board, is it fair to then turn around and say "it's none of your business" when comments are made?
I've seen done numerous times, both on personal and even political levels. I find it baffling.
If you're sensitive about something, maybe don't publicize it?

[bicentennial_baby]

1. Agreed

:hi:

[GirlinContempt]

12. Hey chicka

[Blue-Jay]

2. Why don't you mind your own fucking business?

:silly:

[GirlinContempt]

11. I'm a shrill nosy busybody

[La Lioness Priyanka]

3. no in general i suppose its not fair to say that

[GirlinContempt]

13. It might be fair if say,

I was asking you for info. If you posted something about, I don't know, drug use and I demanded to know what drugs you've ever smoked on what dates and with whom. That would not be my business, unless the context of the discussion somehow merited it which seems unlikely.

[Phillycat]

4. No, I think that's ridiculous.

The other thing I find ridiculous is when a long-time poster posts something stupid or offensive, and a newbie calls him/her on it, and then all his/her friends jump in and say, "But you have to KNOW ___poster xyz___, he's a sweetheart! You're making assumptions when you don't know anything, so piss off!"

People, it's a PUBLIC MESSAGE BOARD. The only thing we really have to represent ourselves are our words on the computer screen. You are responsible for typing the words you would like to represent yourself. If you've said something stupid or offensive, the newbie poster is NOT responsible for searching the past year of your posts to see if maybe that one stupid comment was an aberration. They are perfectly within their rights to say, "Hey, that's stupid/offensive. What's up with that?"

[unpossibles]

5. good point. I know I've said some really stupid things

but usually will at least apologize if I offend someone.












Unless they're totally full of shit, of course.

[JackBeck]

27. That's a wonderful lead you establish.

Many should heed this advice and follow.

[GirlinContempt]

9. Well said

:thumbsup:

[sniffa]

23. my Love grows stronger everyday

:loveya: :loveya: :loveya: :loveya:

[ghostsofgiants]

6. That just makes far too much sense.

[mark414]

7. which is why it'll never happen...

[bridgit]

8. i just love the standard 'open' message board retort, "I wasn't talking to you!!!"

:rofl:

[GirlinContempt]

10. I WAS TALKING TO THE OP MYOFB!!!!!!#@#%#%

[bridgit]

14. preeee-cisley!

:thumbsup:

[GirlinContempt]

15. Who asked you anyway?!?

You're always butting in.

Re. God. Damn. Diculous.

[bridgit]

25. if you don't want my sunshine in your thread then i'll just go eat worms & die you meany...

:spray:

[GirlinContempt]

26. Wow that's creepy

[bridgit]

37. oh i know...

:scared:

[Dave Reynolds]

28. Don't post to me.

Or I'll tell the mods. :P

Actually, there's a FReaker who has told people that enough times to be made fun of.

[GirlinContempt]

29. HAHAHA I"LL SHOW YOU

[Dave Reynolds]

31. Okay, I'll let it slide this time.

But don't do it again.

[bridgit]

32. i'm only posting to you long enough to tell you i'm not posting to you...

:woohoo:

[S n o w b a l l]

33. Well I admit I'm guilty of that to you, GirlinContempt

...but when you address someone "what the eff are you talking about?" what do you expect really?

There's a way of promoting diaglogue and that's not it. Don't be surprised when you get the "i was talking to the op" reply.

[GirlinContempt]

38. Well you weren't exactly prompting dialouge either

but I figured it was pretty safe to assume that "eff" would be taken as silly. My bad. I wont use it in addressing you in the future.

Whatever, I don't really care that much. I just find it hilarious no matter who it's coming from.

[S n o w b a l l]

50. Exactly...

But, that's just it...I wasn't trying to prompt dialogue. That's why I said my comment was to the OP. You were..and I'll say it again...that's no way to go about it. You brought up the issue here and I was just trying to explain. Things are not always black and white when you bring up an issue like this... there's sometimes more to it.

You don't have to get defensive with me. You brought up the issue and I was only explaining myself.

[GirlinContempt]

51. Well

You explained yourself by saying you didn't want to talk about it so you posted it on a message board and didn't answer someone else cause you didn't like the way they asked the question.

Why am I even replying to this? It's stupid. It doesn't matter. I don't care why you didn't want to reply to me, frankly, and I'm pretty sure you don't care about what I have to say. It doesn't matter.

EDIT:
I mean I don't care in the context of this specific incident.

[S n o w b a l l]

54. You're not comprehending...

I never said I didn't want to talk about it but if someone approaches me with "what the eff", it doesn't leave me with much desire to talk. I was defending my use of "I was replying to the OP".

Aren't you kind of guilty of your own accusations in this thread? You brought up the issue but it doesn't matter to you and you don't care what I have to say? Isn't that kinda what you were accusing others of? I guess it's none of my business and I shouldn't have responded. You weren't talking to me, right?

:eyes:

We'll leave it..I'll go away now.

[GirlinContempt]

55. I don't care about that one specific incident

between you and I. I don't really want to hash it out in ANOTHER thread. I thought it was ridiculous, and I think it's even MORE ridiculous to carry it on.

You're offering me the excuse that it was justified because you didn't like the way I posed the question. Fine. But rehashing details of some past confrontation? I don't care. I don't need to go over every detail of some forgotten exchange with you to understand what you're saying. You've said you thought it was justified because of how I posed the question, I've said what I have to say about that, there is no need to continue some bullshit discussion about one specific incident.

And this "Isn't that kinda what you were accusing others of? I guess it's none of my business and I shouldn't have responded. You weren't talking to me, right?" is even more ridiculous. Beyond ridiculous.

[S n o w b a l l]

56. The subject was brought up in this thread...

I replied and it wasn't just to you...it was to everyone who was commenting on the "I was replying to the OP" comments.

My point was that sometimes that comment is justified.

That is all.

[GirlinContempt]

57. I got the point and the explanation

Anything further, to me, is just rehashing something that doesn't need rehashing.
Hence my 'I don't care' and my qualifying it with 'I don't care about this specific incident'

[Zuiderelle]

16. What a great question. I find that baffling as well.

:thumbsup:

[GirlinContempt]

41. Where are the people who understand it, though?

I'd like to hear from em.

[Zuiderelle]

62. Another good question!

:thumbsup: :D

[NewJeffCT]

17. Is this about when I called you out about stalking me?

:evilgrin:

just kidding, of course.

But, if I say something stupid on a public message board, I don't think I should get upset if somebody calls me on it. I should kick myself for saying the stupid thing... or, that I should have said something via email instead of a public message board.

[GirlinContempt]

19. Who is stalking who?!?!?!

:P

[NewJeffCT]

20. touche

I'll only stalk you if you wear glasses, though.

http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=show_mesg&forum=105&topic_id=6266394&mesg_id=6277642

[GirlinContempt]

22. You've seen my shots

[Richard Steele]

18. That strikes me as, well...kinda insane.

Not TOTALLY insane on its own....but exactly the type of
thing an insane person does, y'know?

[GirlinContempt]

40. I'm not sure what you mean

[Susang]

21. No, it is not fair

It's bullying to suggest something posted publicly is not the business of a fellow forum member, no matter how much you disagree with him/her. Unfortunately, DU seems to be somewhat overpopulated by some seriously hyper-sensitive net bullies these days. :eyes:

[cwydro]

34. I agree

"hyper-sensitive net bullies". Exactly.:applause:

[Susang]

36. Don't get me wrong

Hypersensitivity can be extremely useful in some situations (wink wink, nudge nudge). And I'm sure that dozens of people here can point out several occasions where I've taken things a little too personally. However on the internet, it's usually just wasted energy.

[bigwillq]

24. So true

esp. here in the Lounge, where I've seen it done many times as well.

It amazes me what kind of things people post. :eyes:

[GirlinContempt]

30. I'm more amazed at peoples reactions

to peoples reactions to their posts.

Convoluted enough for ya?

[asthmaticeog]

35. I believe you are correct, ma'am.

[GirlinContempt]

39. Oh yeah?

[asthmaticeog]

48. Um, yeah.

[GirlinContempt]

52. Er, ok, whatever.

:P

[Danger Mouse]

42. Dammit, it's none of your business!

I only posted about it as a shameless bid to get attention!
D'oh.

[GirlinContempt]

44. WELL ATTENTION THIS

neener neener

[Danger Mouse]

47. Aw shit.

You got me.

[grace0418]

43. Today I got the question "Why do you care?"

Uh, well you posted something on a public message board and I read it (for the millionth time, but that's another story) and decided to respond.

[GirlinContempt]

45. Why do you care?

:P Sorry, yeah it's a weird thing to ask if you're directly responding to something that person said.

[grace0418]

46. Considering the source, I should've expected as much.

What ev.

Yeah, definitely weird though.

[dolo amber]

49. Oh, you and your sense-making

:eyes:

[GirlinContempt]

53. I don't see how this is any of your concern.

[BarenakedLady]

58. I agree...

But then again I always feel odd jumping into a conversation that is going back and forth between two people. I feel like I'm crashing some party I wasn't invited to. LoL. That's my own weirdness though, and I don't fault others from chiming in. And oddly I don't feel that when if people jump into my ongoing conversations.

Hmmmm I'm sure my therapist could tell me exactly what that means. :crazy:

[GirlinContempt]

61. I sometimes do too

but I do it anyway :)

[RandomKoolzip]

59. I'm impotent.

[GirlinContempt]

60. Do you need some help?

[ScreamingMeemie]

63. I don't know if it is... I have seen several times on a message board

I participate on (I'm not naming names but it's here) that people are a bit disingenuous in their posting. i.e. I see a lot of callouts/personal messages made public for the sake of being mean.

[GirlinContempt]

65. Personal messages being made pubic

by one while the other does not want it to be so and does not participate in public discussion is wrong, and it should not be the business of the stranger poster. It was intended to be private, and it's none of anyones business.

Callouts to me are in an entirely different category.

[GirlinContempt]

66. To be clear:

Callouts are vague. Engi could take this thread as a callout of her, despite the fact that the incident that happened with her never occurred to me and I meant this thread in a very general way.
I've been accuse of attacking or calling out another poster when I was talking about a CD I made for a friend, and when I re-read it there was NOTHING in there that made any sense to me as an offensive or nasty thing. I had NO idea what the person was talking about.
So, I think they're different because it's so incredibly open to interpretation that it can be very hard to label.

[Ms_Dem_Meanor]

64. It's not fair...

if they didn't want anybody to comment, they shouldn't have posted it.

[eyepaddle]

67. Yeah, but honestly totally out of proportin

flameouts are what make teh intertrons fun. In a trainwreck watching sorta way.