Like Michael Bolton in Office Space, have you ever dealt with any faulty office equipment?

[Initech]

Me, I've been locked in a constant battle with the office paper shredder. Although I think I won that one.

[guitar man]

1. stupid fax machine must die!!! nt

[guitar man]

2. delete-dupe nt

[Little Wing]

3. our CFO spends 5 times as much time should be necessary to send or receive faxes

because he bought 3 cases of fax toner which only works for that machine. and it's a total piece of crap.

yes, he's a Republic

[Danger Mouse]

4. A story of poetic justice for you.

When I was in college, I was doing work-study in the Romance Languages Department as an administrative assistant.
Anyway, the woman I originally worked under left the job to pursue her education, and so this new guy, a temp, was hired. Well...the temp was a dickhead. He was rude all the time, snotty, know-it-all type.
There was always something going on with the copier in the office, so one day, it needs toner. He's berating me about how stupid I am while trying to change a bottle of toner, apparently he's the God of Copiers or something, when the old bottle comes flying out of the machine (due solely to his own stupidity) and empties all over the front of his nice shirt and pants.
Asshole had it coming.
:)

[Initech]

6. The worst that could happen is I could spill toner all over my $6,000 pants! COME ON!

[Pied Piper]

11. I see...

Another fan of "Arrested Development"!

[kwassa]

12. Same thing happened to a prick of a boss

Showing how manly he was to a very attractive young woman employee, who actually disliked him. We all disliked him.

He managed to distribute a dry toner cartridge over all three pieces of his suit, forcing him to leave the office for the day. She came staggering into our office fighting as hard as she could to keep from exploding in laughter.

[The Velveteen Ocelot]

5. My work computer.

It's an oldish pile of crap PC that makes constant strange clicking sounds and has a memory capacity hardly greater than a Commodore 64. Aside from the fact that I'm a Macophile who hates PCs in general, I especially loathe this POS. I tried to kill it once by simultaneously running CorelDraw and Framemaker; it just hung up but didn't explode, much to my disappointment.

And don't get me started on the huge, ancient, slow fax machine and the microwave that always smells like popcorn.

[Initech]

8. Mine too.

I use a 666MHz CELERON. The thing is 7 years old and cant even run the UPS shipping software that I require to do my job.

I don't have any problems with fax machines but we have a KIP 6000 printer. That thing drives me fucking crazy. It's constantly jamming and has spent more time in the shop than any car I've ever owned. :argh:

[Danger Mouse]

9. When working at a different place at college, my computer...

for some reason, made this horrible loud noise all the time.
It was kind of funny, except it wasn't, because I was trapped in the same small office with the damn roaring beast.
Eventually, it died.
Gee, what a shock.

[fizzgig]

7. i constantly get the 'pc load letter' error at work

the same printer also has the habit of telling me there is a paper jam when there is no paper jam. i am taking that printer with me when i leave and i'm gonna take a bat to that piece o' shit

[Kutjara]

10. Printers, photocopiers, faxmachines, elevators, coffee makers:

These are the machines that no amount of technological advancement will ever get to work right. They are God's way of telling us to stop wasting paper, get some exercise, and stop drinking shit.

[sniffa]

13. yeah, the sLovakian who sits next to me

but onLy 2 more days, and she's outta here forever. :bounce:

[Commie Pinko Dirtbag]

14. Bratislava!

Miami Vice is number one new show man!

Give her a quarter and watch her become a hotel owner when she arrives home!

[deepthought42]

15. My computer needs to just die already...

I swear this thing has been around for far too long (it was built for Windows '95). What is it still doing alive? Meh. That and one or two co-workers....;) :spank:

[dropkickpa]

16. My computer

wondrous piece of shit that it is. Just watch me open a pdf and make it explode! It was designed for Windows 2000/NT, been rigged to run xp (sorta, it loves to crash). Oh, and the goddamn printer that gets jammed if you put paper in the tray. You have to use the manual door thingy. Fun fun! THAT sumbitch is getting dropkicked real soon if they don't get me a new one.

But, I am getting a dissection 'scope finally!!! (supposedly, it is in the budget, but we'll see if it ever actually gets ordered)

[grace0418]

17. Our color lasers. CONSTANTLY.

I am hooked up to four different color laser printers. I design a variety of different products that need to be mocked up for our sales department. And even though we tell them a color laser printout is not accurate for color, they still freak out every time something is not "the right color." But our printers are so fickle, it's impossible to know which one is going to print decently at any given time. I waste so much paper printing the same file to 3 or 4 different printers to get one printout that looks decent enough to keep the sales staff happy.