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My own "special comment" on the war (a.k.a. a grief-filled rant)

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Cabcere Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Feb-15-07 10:11 PM
Original message
My own "special comment" on the war (a.k.a. a grief-filled rant)
They say that there are different stages of grief people go through when they hear bad news: shock, denial, bargaining, anger, depression, etc. (and finally acceptance, but I'm nowhere near that one yet). This afternoon, at about 12:30pm, my little brother IMed me to tell me that one of my friends from high school was killed in Iraq yesterday. At first, I couldn't believe it...but gradually it sank in, and ever since then I've been on an emotional rollercoaster of depression, numbness, and anger. Right now, I am angry, and so please forgive me if I rant too much here - I just needed to vent somewhere, and right now I'm not in the mood to have my patriotism questioned or my feelings criticized.

*deep breath* Okay, here we go.

My friend's name was Danny. He was two years younger than me, and I met him in high school marching band. He was a trumpet player (and a damn good one, I might add!), and he was one of those people who could always make anybody smile, no matter what. He was great on the marching field - perfect posture, crisp movement, commanding presence - so it didn't really surprise me to learn he had joined the Marines after graduation. One of the things I remember about him was the way he could take band seriously - snap to attention, march cleanly, hit every note perfectly - all with a twinkle in his eye. When we had competitions to see who was the best marcher, he always did great, but even when he was zoned in on the task at hand and focusing on marching his best, you always knew that behind his stern "game face," there was a smile waiting for his friends. And he had lots of friends. He was a charmer - one of those guys who could make any girl feel special and any guy feel cool. He was a great guy, funny, smart, sweet, and talented...and he never lived to see his 20th birthday.

Danny was shot and killed yesterday (on Valentine's Day, which is bitterly ironic - he was always such a sweetheart, and he took my best friend to the Valentine's Day dance one year when she didn't have a date at the last minute), at the age of 19. All that life, all that promise, all that talent, snuffed out...and for what? The thing that upsets me the most about Danny's death is not that it happened at war. He was a Marine, and he was proud to serve his country - this I know. But what really upsets me is that it was this war. It would have been hard enough to lose a friend like him under any circumstances, but the fact that no one will ever see his smile or know his friendship again because of a lie...that's the worst part. My friend died for a lie; he died for a "president's" overinflated ego; he died for arrogance and petty vendettas and WMDs that weren't there.

Forgiveness is divine, they say; time heals all wounds, they say; this too shall pass, they say; and about a million other cliches I'm sure Danny would laugh at me for using here. One day, I may be able to forgive George W. Bush for killing my friend and thousands of other people who were sons, and daughters, and aunts, and uncles, and cousins, and parents, and friends, and lovers. One day, I may be able to tap into that divinity and forgive Bush's deadly lies and all the horror he has inflicted on not only the Iraqis, but on his own American people. One day, I may be a better person than I am now, but for today, I cannot do that. Today, I simply cannot find it in what's left of my heart to forgive that monster for ending thousands of promising and fruitful lives, all for arrogant lies, greed for oil and power, and a selfish need to prove his manliness. Mr. President, you have proved nothing - except that you are a lying, arrogant, spoiled brat who is a plague upon our nation (and, indeed, the world). And in his nineteen short years on this Earth, Mr. President, my friend Danny was more of a man than you will ever be - even if you live to be a hundred. For the world's sake, sir, I hope you do not - but if you do, I hope that one day you will realize the full extent of the horrors you have inflicted, and that that knowledge will haunt you for the rest of your days.

My Christian upbringing and the force of habit dictate that I end this long message with a "May God forgive you, Mr. President," but I cannot. I cannot ask God's forgiveness for you just yet, sir, and I doubt that I will ever be able to offer you mine. You have caused the death of one of the kindest, sweetest, and funniest men I have ever known. He is not your first victim, nor will he be your last...so until the killing in your name comes to an end, Mr. President, I can only pray for Peace. Peace in Iraq, peace at home, and peace for Danny's family and friends - and the families and friends of the thousands of other victims of your regime. Peace - may it come soon.
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Arugula Latte Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Feb-15-07 10:21 PM
Response to Original message
1. Thanks for posting this ...
I'm so sorry about Danny. :hug:

George W. Bush is a mass murderer, pure and simple.
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SPKrazy Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Feb-15-07 10:25 PM
Response to Original message
2. So Sorry To Hear About Your Friend
and the over 3000 other friends, family members, lovers, fathers, mothers, etc. that have been killed, for what?

Lies, on top of lies. So that greedy pockets can be lined by the war profiteers. The oil people can make their money. The world is made a less safe place. The children of a generation are being killed. The children and parents in Iraq are being killed.

FOR WHAT?

you are not wrong to rant.

I'm sorry for your loss friend :hug:

I'm sorry for America's loss too.

:loveya:

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Shell Beau Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Feb-15-07 10:29 PM
Response to Original message
3. What a sad story. I know how you feel. It is tough to ask forgiveness
for a monster. I do it, even though sometimes I question my own genuineness. I am sorry is all I can say. And God will bless this child's soul.
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MedleyMisty Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Feb-15-07 10:29 PM
Response to Original message
4. Oh no!
:hug:

That's all I've got right now. I am so incredibly sorry for the loss of your friend. With that kind of tribute, he must have been an absolutely wonderful person.
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av8rdave Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Feb-15-07 10:35 PM
Response to Original message
5. I'm sorry for your and Danny's family's loss...
You are in no way unpatriotic to post this. Quite the contrary.

I served as an officer in the military many years ago. I took an oath of office, as well as the American Fighting Man's Code of Conduct, in which I pledged to give my life for my country if necessary. I was prepared to fulfill that oath. That, however, was on the assumption that the leadership of my country was acting in good faith and didn't take the sacrifice of our military lightly.

Sadly, Danny didn't give his life for his country. He served honorably and bravely, and dutifully fulfilled the orders of his commanders. However, I believe it is exactly as you said. He died for a lie, and none of that was his choice. He was ordered to war by a political party full of people (including the President) who hadn't the courage to serve when it was their opportunity, yet had no second thoughts about sending the loved ones of others to fight and die. Your anger is righteous, though I'm sure it does nothing to ease your pain. There have been so many like Danny - outstanding, bright, caring and brave human beings whose lives have been wrongly and prematurely ended.

I'm so sorry to answer your rant with a rant, but I couldn't help it. Though I didn't know him, RIP Danny.
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Hugin Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Feb-15-07 10:38 PM
Response to Original message
6. Why, why, oh, why... Aren't Lounge posts allowed on the Greatest anymore?
Thanks for your Heartfelt post!

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salin Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Feb-15-07 10:43 PM
Response to Reply #6
7. This OP should be cross posted in GD
and undoubtedly woiuld go to the greatest page. Where it should be.
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Cabcere Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Feb-15-07 10:44 PM
Response to Reply #7
8. How would I go about doing that?
Just copy & paste? :shrug:
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salin Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Feb-15-07 10:50 PM
Response to Reply #8
9. The charge has been taken up already:
see http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=view_all&address=389x223353 and reccommend. It refers directly back to this thread.
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Cabcere Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Feb-15-07 10:55 PM
Response to Reply #9
13. Cheers
:hi: :hug: Thanks for your help!
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salin Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Feb-15-07 11:01 PM
Response to Reply #13
18. no thanks for me... you have shared something so
personal, beautiful and important. I just wanted to share your words more broadly - am glad that acchtung - acted. I am so very sorry for your loss -and so appreciative of your words... my condolences and deepest condolences.
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Redstone Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Feb-15-07 11:34 PM
Response to Reply #9
27. Hey, thanks for setting that up. Recommended.
Redstone
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Hissyspit Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Feb-15-07 10:52 PM
Response to Reply #8
10. Yes. Instead of clicking on The DU Lounge when you click Post
Edited on Thu Feb-15-07 11:04 PM by Hissyspit
click on General Discussion. And then cut and paste it into the new posting.

I think others will want to hear your story Cabcere. And others here have lost loved ones and acquaintances to this madness - I know of at least one of my former students, father of a two-year-old, who has died, and I had a former student and close friend injured in an IED attack. Others care and I believe we are all here, when at our best, to help support each other.

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salin Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Feb-15-07 10:53 PM
Response to Original message
11. Loungers... share this story by clicking this link and recommending:
http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=show_mesg&forum=389&topic_id=223353&mesg_id=223391

a post in GD about this thread that links to this thread. Get this on the Greatest Page.
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lonestarnot Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Feb-15-07 10:54 PM
Response to Original message
12. Mr. President....sir...
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achtung_circus Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Feb-15-07 10:56 PM
Response to Original message
14. Now on Greatest page,
and rightfully so.
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LoveMyCali Donating Member (694 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Feb-15-07 10:57 PM
Response to Original message
15. I'm so sorry about your friend Danny
but it also scares me to death because I have a nephew that was just deployed to Iraq on MOnday. :cry:
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Cabcere Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Feb-15-07 11:00 PM
Response to Reply #15
17. I'll be praying for your nephew
and all the other soldiers who are over there. :hug: :grouphug:
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LoveMyCali Donating Member (694 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Feb-15-07 11:23 PM
Response to Reply #17
25. Thank you,
Matt and all our men and women over there need all the prayers they can get.
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SeattleGirl Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Feb-15-07 10:57 PM
Response to Original message
16. I am so sorry for your loss, Cabcere
:grouphug:
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Redstone Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Feb-15-07 11:01 PM
Response to Original message
19. I do NOT mean to sound harsh, but welcome to the 1960s. How many of us went
Edited on Thu Feb-15-07 11:39 PM by Redstone
through what you're going though, with the 58,000 we lost (including my Big Brother and best friend, and later those with whom I stood and fought) in Viet Nam?

How many more have to suffer like you are suffering, you and your friend's family...how many more?

And for what? For nothing. Just like it was 40 years ago. For nothing.

I am SO sorry for your loss, and for his family's loss.

Redstone
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Cabcere Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Feb-15-07 11:15 PM
Response to Reply #19
23. Thank you for your post and your perspective, Redstone
You don't sound harsh at all, and I appreciate you sharing your story. I'm so sorry about the loss of your brother and your friends...I have only lost one friend to this war (so far), and so I can't even imagine what Viet Nam must have been like for you. :hug: As you might have guessed, I'm not quite old enough to have lived through that war - I only know what I have heard from my parents, other relatives, professors, etc., and it seems to me like Iraq is on its way to becoming Viet Nam II. :( I hope and pray it doesn't go that far. One devastating war like that is more than enough. :grouphug:
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Redstone Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Feb-15-07 11:31 PM
Response to Reply #23
26. I weep for your loss. I weep for your friend's family. I do. Not ONE life lost
should go unmourned.

All these lives lost, and all the wounded who will never be right, all for nothing.

Thank you so much for your thoughtful reply, and once aqain, my condolences to you and your friend's family.

Redstone
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LynzM Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Feb-15-07 11:04 PM
Response to Original message
20. I'm so sorry, Cabcere....
So sorry for the loss that you and everyone who knew, or would have known, Danny is suffering, so sorry for the pain. I wish that I could do something to help ease it... it will add to the motivation to fight George Bush until he and his terrible plans are stopped.

May time bring peace to you and all who knew Danny. :hug: :cry:
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GenDem Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Feb-15-07 11:12 PM
Response to Original message
21. I am so sorry Cabcere!
Your friend Danny's life should not be over. I can't imagine what grief and anger you must be feeling right now. I don't know anyone that has died in bush's illegal war, just unfamiliar names and numbers that continue to grow. But, when I read your beautifully written description of Danny -- it hit me -- these losses are real people with family and friends that will suffer the anguish of a loss that just shouldn't be.

God bless you, your friends, and Danny's family. :cry:
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HCE SuiGeneris Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Feb-15-07 11:13 PM
Response to Original message
22. My deepest sympathies for your loss
and the loss to all of his family and friends. I wish you well as you traverse the waters of your grief. :grouphug:
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Katherine Brengle Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Feb-15-07 11:19 PM
Response to Original message
24. I'm so sorry you lost your friend...
:hug:
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keithjx Donating Member (758 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Feb-15-07 11:38 PM
Response to Original message
28. I'm so sorry....
:hug:
KJ
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truedelphi Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Feb-16-07 12:08 AM
Response to Original message
29. You lost your friend, and your generation is losing their innocence
Edited on Fri Feb-16-07 12:08 AM by truedelphi
And I am so sorry.

Those of us who are a generation or two older went through a HELL of a lot of crap
thinking that if we fought the forces of bad politics and war profiteering - no other genertion would ever face this again.

Every time I think of how much fun we had in the late seventies - I think - if only I had known how ugly things would be thirty years later - I would have worked harder to stop the nightmare that is occurring now.

If you can't forgive Bush (and I cannot either) then I hope you can forgive us. We were like the Hobbits of the Shire, thinking that evil was somewhere out there far away and not realizing that Mordor was still powerful and only waiting for the right moment to inflict its darkness everywhere.
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LonelyLRLiberal Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Feb-16-07 12:26 AM
Response to Original message
30. I'm sorry - this is so sad
and so unnecessary.

I hope that some day Bush, Cheney, Rummy and the rest of those sociopaths are convicted of the war crimes they have committed.
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northofdenali Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Feb-16-07 12:28 AM
Response to Original message
31. My heart hurts for you, Cabcere -
and I understand, and feel, the anger.

God go with him, and prayers for his family and friends.
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merh Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Feb-16-07 12:48 AM
Response to Original message
32. I am sorry for your loss and the pain you know.
I am sorry for the hole in the hearts of those that loved your friend.

May your memories and love, may the memories and love of his family and friends, in time bring you all comfort.

I join you in praying for Peace.

And heaven has a new trumpter - may he play and rest in peace.

:hug:

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Kali Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Feb-16-07 01:13 AM
Response to Original message
33. ...
no words of mine can do justice to what you have written or convey my sympathy, fear and anger. I had to respond, though.
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enigmatic Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Feb-16-07 02:14 AM
Response to Original message
34. I'm so sorry, Cabcere
I don't know what to say anymore about the slaughter over there that hasn't been said; we have to get out now, and we never should have been there in the first place.

All the good vibes I can send are headed your way; hang in there:)
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Scott Neelan Donating Member (9 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Feb-16-07 05:18 AM
Response to Original message
35. My Condolences
My deepest sympathy to not only you, but all the others affected by the loss of your friend. I have several family members and high school friends in all branches of the military, and I worry every day that I'll end up getting a message along the same lines about one of them.

And like you said, it's all based on a lie. A lie bought hook, line, and sinker by a Republican Congress and a general public all too eager to put their faith in a corrupt administration. I couldn't imagine the grief I'd be going through in your situation. I feel grief enough every time I hear of another person dying in Iraq.

We need to do whatever we can to end this war now. Haven't enough people died for absolutely nothing?

Like I said, you have my utmost sympathy. No one should ever have to go through what you're dealing with right now.
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DemReadingDU Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Feb-16-07 06:41 AM
Response to Original message
36. I am sorry for the loss of your friend
It is always so sad to lose someone so young. May fond memories of him comfort you.
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BluePatriot Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Feb-16-07 10:12 AM
Response to Original message
37. ...
My condolences for your loss. I am speechless right now. This is really eerie, but I had a remarkably similar acquaintance in my life who was a very positive role model for our band and I could not bear to think of him being killed. It's very easy to place myself in your shoes.

Our trumpet section leader was also named Danny, well, Daniel, and I know he joined the military after graduation...I am 23, though, so I am fairly sure/hold the hope he's not the same person you speak of...still, I know you may not be up to it yet, but I hope you don't mind PM'ing me with a few more details.

:hug:
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file83 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Feb-16-07 11:21 AM
Response to Original message
38. Your description of Danny makes me like the guy even though I never knew him...
...it seems his charm knows no bounds.

My greatest sympathies to you, everyone he knew, his family, and Danny.

By the way - that was a beautifully written piece there - well done.
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wicket Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Feb-16-07 11:26 AM
Response to Original message
39. I am so incredibly sorry
:hug: :cry:
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Kajsa Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Feb-16-07 11:31 AM
Response to Original message
40. Oh Cabcere, this is so heart breaking.

I am truly sorry for your loss.
Danny sounds like a guy I would have as a best friend.

What a terrible loss
And for what?--

I attended the funeral of a former student who was one
of the first casualties in this God forsaken war.
His name was Jose Garibay, and he was killed two weeks
after the war started. He was 21.

I'll be thinking of you.
You and Danny's family are in my thoughts and prayers.

:hug:
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SammyWinstonJack Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Feb-16-07 11:39 AM
Response to Original message
41. Very sorry about the death of your friend.
:-( Ego trumps peace, right george? :grr:
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redwitch Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Feb-16-07 11:43 AM
Response to Original message
42. I am sorry for your loss.
Sounds like Danny was a great guy who should still be here. Troops out now.
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bluescribbler Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Feb-16-07 11:49 AM
Response to Original message
43. Here's a kick
:kick: :cry:

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Mnemosyne Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Feb-16-07 12:43 PM
Response to Original message
44. I am so sorry, Cabcere. They are almost
all so very young. :cry::hug:
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Chorophyll Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Feb-16-07 12:55 PM
Response to Original message
45. I'm so sorry, Cabcere.
You don't have to pray for forgiveness for Bush. Just pray that he sees the error of his ways before more lives are lost.

:patriot: for Danny, and a belated Valentine heart for you.

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Raffi Ella Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Feb-16-07 01:00 PM
Response to Original message
46. .
what a beautifully moving tribute to you dear friend.It's one of the most genuine posts I've read in a very long time.The sheer honesty of your words is incredibly moving. :hug:

Danny had a incredible friend in you,of that I am sure.May your dear friend rest in peace,I am so sorry for your loss Cabcere.
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Oeditpus Rex Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Feb-16-07 01:10 PM
Response to Original message
47. I grieve with you
For Danny, and for the hundreds of thousands of others.

:hug: :patriot:

You should send this to your local newspaper.

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emcguffie Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Feb-16-07 02:11 PM
Response to Original message
48. Far too beautifully done to be "a rant". NT
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Pithlet Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Feb-16-07 09:12 PM
Response to Original message
49. I'm really sorry for your loss.
:hug:
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mnhtnbb Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Feb-16-07 09:35 PM
Response to Original message
50. Cabcere, I'm so sorry for the loss of your friend, Danny.
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NewWaveChick1981 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Feb-16-07 09:38 PM
Response to Original message
51. You have my utmost sympathy.
:pals: :hug: And I agree with what you've said. Bush has been responsible for the deaths of so many Americans and so many Iraqis, and the madness must stop.
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peace13 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Feb-16-07 09:50 PM
Response to Original message
52. Thank you for writing this.
Your friend was a brave soul and I am so sorry that his life was cut short. For you I will say that there are hundreds of thousands of us working with you to get this war stopped. I will carry you with me as I march and call and work like hell to get the job done. Love to you in this very difficult time. Peace on earth, kim
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