Ever made a complete ass of yourself? Yeah, me either.

[crim son]

:rofl: I've been known to misinterpret certain interactions. You?

James! Bring me another one!

[gr8dane_daddy]

Yeah, I once at a wedding asked a couple when they were expecting...

when she wasn't even pregnant. Glad I don't see those folks much at all.

[crim son]

2. Oh, that's a sin!

I hope you learned your lesson!

[gr8dane_daddy]

4. I felt absolutely horrible...

however the Dos Equis helped eased my pain.

[crim son]

7. That's what it's there for. A toast to you!

I had somebody look at me once and say, "Are you pregnant?" I was eight months pregnant! What the heck else could it have been? These mistakes happen.

[Richardo]

53. Remember the sage advice of Dave Barry:

"You should never say anything to a woman that even remotely suggests you think she's pregnant unless you can see an actual baby emerging from her at that moment. "

[TOhioLiberal]

1. me either...

...lol yeah right! How are you Crim son?

[crim son]

5. I'm okay.

I've been reversing night and day lately where I stay up all night and sleep all day. This evening I decided to have a few drinks to help get me to sleep. I'm not sleepy but am rapidly approaching idiocy. How are you, dear TOhioLiberal?

[TOhioLiberal]

11. Doing better than yesterday...

...I was SICK! Like in bed at 8pm, slept fitfully all night. Starting to feel better, now hubby and son have it also. Not fun!

[crim son]

14. What do you have?

We have a bad cold and the 24 hr. flu at our house. I'm dealing with the cold right now.

[TOhioLiberal]

45. Some kind of stomache thing...

...I'll be no more specific than that. I'm sure you can imagine. :puke:

[crim son]

47. I hate that. Sorry.

:hug:

[GalleryGod]

19. Up All Night ? Are you out of Work? You can help me grade bluebooks!

That is a terrible rut to fall in to...very unhealthy !

[crim son]

24. What are you teaching?

If it's physics, forget it!

[GalleryGod]

35. Poli Sci 303

The American Presidency

[crim son]

36. I'll help.

Despite what you see here, I can both formulate an original idea and recognize one. I'm in. When do I start?

Actually, I'm going to a tech school to become qualified to work in administration in a hospital or what have you. I have a degree in psychology/sociology but it's just an undergraduate degree and that gets me no job. I need to work because I'm getting divorced.

[SPKrazy]

3. Never....

really

never

[crim son]

10. Why Pawpicker, what's wrong with your nose?

Let's call these instances "learning opportunities" shall we?

[SPKrazy]

13. my nose?

whatever are you referring to?

[crim son]

18. Ummm, nothing.

I am the model of discretion if not of valor.

[SPKrazy]

21. your discretion is appreciated

but what, my nose is fine?


:blush:

[crim son]

28. yes, it's perfect.

:eyes:

[SPKrazy]

30. that's what I thought

:hide:

[reformedrepub]

6. LOL

Me too.....

[crim son]

8. Yeah baby.

This is how I deal with it! :hug:

[BarenakedLady]

9. You must be joking if you are asking ME that question

I misinterpret everything and often make a fool of myself in the process.

I need another myself....Giles! Another martini please!

[crim son]

15. I'm having the mango fusion vodka.

First sip, right now. Cough cough choke. Ah, delightful.

[BarenakedLady]

22. Oh aren't you the lady....

as I slug from the bottle still in the paper bag...

I kid, I kid...







I threw the bag out.

[crim son]

23. Yeah, I'm a lady.

When I win the lottery I'm flying you and the kids up here for a few days. Then you can see what a lady I really am! And I can witness your virtues as well.

[BarenakedLady]

34. Woot!

ParTay!...:bounce: :bounce:

[CaliforniaPeggy]

12. My dear crim son........

Have I? Omigod......

Not in a while, thank goodness!

But, baby, I sure have...:blush:

[crim son]

16. Delete, double post.

It's the lightning-fast fingers.

[crim son]

17. I can't imagine it!

Well, perhaps I can. But even your embarrassing moments were probably very dignified and courteous. :hug:

[CaliforniaPeggy]

25. Oh, I wish!

Alas, they were NOT.....

I used to stammer, blush, and say really stupid things.........

No more, though.......:hug:

[crim son]

27. I'll blush at a job interview. Socially, never.

I guess we outgrow it!

[wildhorses]

20. i do this pretty much on a daily basis--

world's biggest idiot at your service--

[crim son]

26. oooh, a contender for the crown.

Did you once have dignity and then lose it, or have you always been a buffoon? :rofl:

[wildhorses]

31. well, lets put it this way--

for a klutz i am actually pretty graceful :eyes:

and on my good days i am the wildhorses:P

but on my bad days i am an absolute ass:kick:


i think that about covers it...and as the new ignore feature gets in widespread use...i feel sure

my obtuseness will become very apparent:rofl:


looks like i am in good company in this thread though:pals::grouphug::pals:

[crim son]

32. The best.

I piss people off just by being me! I think you are a sweetheart. :loveya:

[wildhorses]

37. its like this--some people NEED to be pissed off

so you are just doing your job, right?

and just tell 'em:

better pissed off
than pissed on

and of course you will be glad to accomadate them either way:P











and btw--i think you are a sweeheart, too :hug:....a real class act that i am proud to know as a

fellow lounge lizard:patriot:

[crim son]

38. Thank you.

That was uncalled for but extremely nice to hear. :pals: :yourock:

[Richard Steele]

29. Is that really a question?

Have you even READ anything I've posted at DU? :rofl:

[crim son]

33. Dude, I don't have to.

"dicksteele"?

But yes, I've read you and you are already a member of this club of elites!

[Richard Steele]

39. Hey, that one was entirely my parents' fault!

Everything OTHER than my silly name, though- that's all me!

[crim son]

40. oops. You are really Richard Steele?

If so, that's the second time I've screwed up. I also made a joke about PatCox. Turns out his name is Patrick. So sorry.

[Richard Steele]

41. Yup. And my friends really call me "Dick".

Actually, to be honest: it's not just my friends! :rofl:

And you didn't really "screw up", y'know. One of the reasons
I enjoy using that as a net handle is that NO ONE in their right mind
would ever assume that it's my real name.

(on the flipside, that's kinda funny about PatCox. Funny cuz
I -just now- realized that PatCox was a racy pun!)

[crim son]

42. I'm glad you have forgiven me.

I had a boyfriend Richard for a while. After a while I started calling him Dick and he took offense. Imagine that.

Poor PatCox. He seemed to be taken by surprise when I called him on it. I'm just disgusting :rofl:

[Richard Steele]

43. I haven't forgiven you. I'm afraid that's simply not possible.

But that's only because I was never offended in the first place, lol!

Hey, it's after 3:00, and I still gotta take out the garbage
and clean the catbox before I go to sleep.

So, I must bid YOU
(and all of the DU crew)
"Til next time: adieu!"

As I've had a few,
my DU + you 'adieu'
is these lame haiku.

Both of 'em.



Goodnight, Crim Son. :hi:

[billyskank]

44. NEVAH

:7









































What?

[crim son]

46. I knew that..

But if there arises a situation where you are required to look like an ass, let me know and I'd be pleased to stand in for you. :hi:

[billyskank]

48. I don't tell this to just everybody

but actually I am very skilled in the looking like an ass ;)

:* :hug:

[crim son]

49. Sep arated at birth, you and I.

I'm the older twin :D

[billyskank]

50. God, you think those minutes make All The Difference, don't you

:P

[crim son]

51. Think of it this way:

age before beauty.

[billyskank]

52. *blush*

:blush:

:loveya: