This is how I'll die

[Redneck Socialist]

"Redneck Socialist: At age 84 you will spontaneously combust while dining out with your family."

:rofl:

At least according to this website: http://evil.berzerker.net/death_predictions.php

Well, my death will be memorable anyway, how about yours?

[crim son]

1. Some how I am not surprised to learn the following:

"crim son: At age 57 aliens will abduct you and use your body for sick and often anally-oriented experiments before dropping you off outside of a local homeless shelter smelling of beer."

A fitting end to this life.

[Redneck Socialist]

2. Well, that beats spontaneously combusting at least. n/t

[crim son]

5. Are you saying I am more or less lucky than you are

in that I will be subjected to anally-oriented experiments at age 57? :rofl:

[Redneck Socialist]

8. Well, the abducted by aliens bit is more interesting anyway

I suspect we could both live without the "anally-oriented experiments..." part though.

[crim son]

11. ... the memory of which is so heinous

that I become an alcoholic and end up in a homeless shelter.

[BarenakedLady]

7. hahahaha

That is too funny!

:rofl:

[crim son]

10. I know I'm amused.

Wanna trade deaths?

[BarenakedLady]

12. What ? With the

anal probing? no thanks...I'll take a pack of wild lap dogs anyday....who knows maybe I just go wild with them, it really doesn't say.

[crim son]

16. What did somebody post yesterday as a way to get me

ready to go out? "The Anal Intruder"? As kutjara (sp?) says, "strangely prescient" :rofl:

[BarenakedLady]

20. Hehehehe

There must be some cosmic message there crim. LoL. :rofl:

[gemdem]

9. But, hey.

You're getting some "action" before you go! ;-)

[SPKrazy]

33. And You Hate Beer

so it must be the aliens

Might want to start locking your doors, although that won't keep aliens out, they have ways to beam you out of your bed at night while you're asleep.

:hide:

[HarukaTheTrophyWife]

49. Oddly plausible...

haruka3_2000: At age 42 you will die from an equipment malfunction in an exciting, fear based reality game show. Your death will receive the highest ratings of any episode of any reality show, ever.

[crim son]

62. So it is!

I will attend your funeral, if I am not too drunk and incontinent at the time.

[ironflange]

3. Oh dear

ironflange: At age 62 while showing your work at a major art gallery, you will be accosted and later slain by PETA activists.

Killed by PETA nuts, how ironic.

[Kutjara]

4. Strangely prescient.

"At age 66 you will fall from the fifth floor window of a hotel while under the influence of Robitussin DM."

Now all I have to do is refuse to stay in hotels over four stories or drink Robitussin and I'll live forever.

[BarenakedLady]

6. Hmmmm

At age 76 you will be attacked by a pack of escaped lap dogs in your neighborhood and never be seen again.

I can deal with that, I guess.

[Generic Brad]

13. In 10 years I will die in an explosion caused by a faulty pilot light and gas leak

How does it know????

[reyd reid reed]

14. Oh. My.

reyd reid reed: At age 93 a meteorite will strike you as you are walking to the gas station to buy a 40oz bottle of King Cobra.

[Drum]

15. Odd...

Drum: At age 84 you will be attacked by a pack of escaped lap dogs in your neighborhood and never be seen again.


Will I mind this so much? True, I only have ONE lap...:eyes:

Damn...BareNakedLady, let's keep in touch about this similar threat we face, eh? Not too many lap-dogs in my 'hood, so mebbe I'm to perish in yours???

[reyd reid reed]

18. You and BNL

must be gonna die together....

:P

[Drum]

21. .

:freak:

[crim son]

23. I see hidden meaning here, Drum.

BNL! Come read this! :hi:

[Drum]

26. Another four decades...ugh!

Whatcha gonna do?

:shrug:

[crim son]

27. Mine says I'll die at 57 but the rest of my family lives well into

their nineties, so I've got you beat. Five more decades, minimum. Let's hope scientists discover a cure for pessimism.

[BarenakedLady]

35. Yay!

I couldn't be happier in my death?....wait that sounds wrong...

Well if I were to die by a pack of wild lap dogs, I can't think of anyone better to be with at the time. :)

[Nicole]

17. Damn kids are gonna kill me!!

Nicole: At age 71 a group of children will text message you continuously for three years, eventually distracting you while driving and causing a fatal wreck; your fatal wreck.

[otherlander]

19. At age 49 you will die

from an equipment malfunction in an exciting, fear based reality game show. Your death will receive the highest ratings of any episode of any reality show, ever.

:rofl:

But... that can't be right. There isn't a school involved.

[SammyWinstonJack]

22. Actually I think that would be a great way to die. I wish the same for me!

I so want to spontaneously combust! And it doesn't have to be while dining out with my family, either! I can dig going alone! It's all cool! :-)

[CanuckAmok]

24. keep refreshing... it's fun!

CanuckAmok: At age 65 while playing Tekken 23, a burgler will break into your house. A fight will ensue and you will lose.

CanuckAmok: At age 70 you will die fighting the Global War on Terrorism in Spain.

CanuckAmok: At age 58 you will die fighting the Global War on Terrorism in Mexico.

CanuckAmok: At age 88 a group of children will text message you continuously for three years, eventually distracting you while driving and causing a fatal wreck; your fatal wreck.

CanuckAmok: At age 78 you will realize that you actually died three years earlier, and have been dreaming all the events since then.

CanuckAmok: At age 84 you will refuse to give a quarter to a beggar. Immediately afterwards you will be hit by a bus.

CanuckAmok: At age 88 you will start playing an online game and become so addicted that you starve to death.

CanuckAmok: At age 66 you will fall into a vat of neutral shoe polish, and your body will never be recovered.


And finally, the most likely:

CanuckAmok: At age 60 you will die lonely and alone.

[RetroLounge]

25. Oh great, and I hate flying...

retrolounge: At age 85 your prototype flying machine will work, and while aloft on its maiden voyage a passenger jet will take you into it's jet engine, and throw you out as a mist.

:rofl:

RL

[name not needed]

28. Yeah, that sounds about right.

At age 28 you will perish under strange circumstances involving a gallon of lotion, two nine volt batteries, and a photograph of a bicycle.

[Richard Steele]

29. OK, this was just fucking frightening:

"Dick Steele: At age 53 you will realize
that you actually died three years earlier,
and have been dreaming all the events since then."

Frightening because I have spent the last 12 years
wondering if that isn't EXACTLY what has happened.
I really can't explain why he didn't pull his trigger,
you know.

And I often wonder if maybe he did. This life would make
a LOT more sense if it was just a figment of my imagination.

[crim son]

30. this is what's real.

You need to figure out why you're part of it. :hug:

[Richard Steele]

36. That's pretty much the hypothesis I use to get by.

"Real", or just real to me? Either way, it's the only
"reality" I have, and it's up to me to exist in it.

I've been thinking about all this for over 12 years now,
and no matter how I look at it, the whole 'real/not real'
question is MOOT. Pointless. Totally irrelevant.

Better thinkers than I figured this out thousands of years ago.
The only thing we know for sure is "cogito, ergo sum".
Everything beyond that must be taken on faith.

And the whole "real/not real" question doesn't change
the fact that it feels really nice to get a :hug: from
a fellow DUer, now does it?

So, a big :hug: back atcha, CS!
(take a deep breath and brace yourself- I'm strong for my size, and I'm not that small)

[SammyWinstonJack]

31. LOL So first I put my maiden name in and it said I would die at 67 by a train

and than I put my married name in and it said I would die at 97 by a burmese tiger.....:rofl:

[SPKrazy]

32. Killed In A Reality Game Show- DU'ers Should Love That!

Southpawkicker: At age 77 you will participate in the newest reality game show. Contestants battle each other in an arena with swords and spears. You will have a good run (12+ victories) but eventually be killed, much to the audience's dismay.



:rofl:

[haf216]

34. Don't see this happening,

At age 53 while playing Street Fighter Omega at an arcade, you will be electrocuted by the headset. You will be the first such death in years.

I really don't care for arcades that much and hate "fighting" video games, but if that is true I only have 14 years left. Hey I can start smoking again, I know it's not going to kill me!!:smoke: :smoke: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl:

[Starbucks Anarchist]

37. Starbucks Anarchist: At age 51...

a large monkey will beat you to death, using the antiquated art of fisticuffs.

:rofl:

[pokerfan]

38. I can actually see this happening

At age 87 you will take a near lethal dose of mescaline, wander the desert for six months, and eventually be eaten by coyotes.

[wildhorses]

44. i guess i'll see you in the desert

:hi:

maybe we can fend off the coyotes together:shrug:

[Connonym]

39. Connonym: At age 77 you will start sleeping more and more....

Connonym: At age 77 you will start sleeping more and more. After six months of this you will be sleeping 19 hours a day. By month seven, you do not wake up anymore. You cease breathing during month nine.


Eerily enough, I was just debating whether to go back to bed for a couple hours.

[Le Taz Hot]

40. Well, I've always figured it will be my mouth

that does me in, however:

LTH: At age 80 you will have a heart attack while eating a deep-fried peanut butter and banana sandwich, Elvis style.

[lizziegrace]

41. Lizziegrace - Age 61 - updated

Lizziegrace: At age 63 a group of friends will urge you to test the "Don't Wizz on the Electric Fence" myth, and you discover that it can kill.

Given my gender, death is certain. :rofl:

[WhollyHeretic]

42. At age 60 you will become lost during a road trip and wind up living out the movie "Wrong Turn".

I do love horror movies and Eliza Dushku wouldn't be a bad person to spend my last few hours with.

[wildhorses]

43. too cool--

At age 102 you will take a near lethal dose of mescaline, wander the desert for six months, and eventually be eaten by coyotes.

[mcscajun]

45. Obviously this program has flaws... LOL

At age 106 you will start playing an online game and become so addicted that you starve to death.

The online game part I can believe; starve to death? I don't think so. Quite the opposite, actually. :rofl:

And who wants to live to 106 anyway? Not me, that's for sure.

[Shell Beau]

46. Just lovely!!

Shell: At age 43 a truly fanatic fan of your spoken word works will stalk you and torture you for a period of weeks. After refusing to sign any more autographs, the fan will kill you.

[GOPisEvil]

47. But hey, at least the ratings will be good...

At age 58 you will die from an equipment malfunction in an exciting, fear based reality game show. Your death will receive the highest ratings of any episode of any reality show, ever.

:rofl:

[Solon]

48. OK, this is just weird...

Note: I put my real name in this thing...

At age 79 the artificial intelligence software you programmed becomes self aware and devours you. You will be saved to disk though, so no worries.

Considering that I'm trying(and failing) to write a viable AI program for computers(hardware is WAY behind software here), that can rewrite its own code, and learn on its own, uhm, this predictor is a little too predictable, though I don't think it'll take OVER 50 years for me to make a self aware program.

[kedrys]

50. At age 98...

...while playing Tekken 23, a burglar will break into your house. A fight will ensue and you will lose.

:rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl:

Edit: the s.o. will be please to learn that...

At age 89 you will die fighting the Interplanetary War on Terrorism on Phobos, a moon of Mars.

[warrior1]

51. Thought so

Warrior1: At age 99 you will start playing an online game and become so addicted that you starve to death

[RevolutionaryActs]

52. At age 69 a large monkey will beat you to death, using the antiquated art of fisticuffs.

:rofl::rofl::rofl::rofl:

[caty]

53. At age 91 I will be hit by a train while napping on the railroad tracks.

Wow, I didn't think I would make it to that age. That must be why I will be napping on the railroad tracks---I will run out of money and become homeless.:(

[mike_c]

54. I'm finally gonna kick the *heroine* habit!

mike_c: At age 87 you finally kick the heroine habit! Congratulations. Unfortunately you stopped because you died from an overdose.

Who knew? I guess we all need heroines!

[QMPMom]

55. QMPMom: At age 98 you will die fighting the Global War on Terrorism in Mexico.

YAY! That means I finally get out of this place! I'm going to Mexico!

[u4ic]

56. I'll die within 5 years

pulling a Ralph Klein! x(


u4ic: At age 45 aliens will abduct you and use your body for sick and often anally-oriented experiments before dropping you off outside of a local homeless shelter smelling of beer.

[ironflange]

68. That's stupid

As if aliens would carry out experiments, especially anal ones, on Ralph. One look and it would be back to Procyon 8 for them.

<-- u4ic

[bigwillq]

57. At age 74

At age 74 your prototype flying machine will work, and while aloft on its maiden voyage a passenger jet will take you into it's jet engine, and throw you out as a mist.

[zanne]

58. At 69, I'll be electrocuted by my headset while playing

Street Fighter Omega at an arcade. It will be the first such incident in history.

[wovenpaint]

59. At age 92 you will refuse to give a quarter to a beggar. Immediately afterwards you will be hit by a

BUS.

Yikes! I'll try to remember that and keep quarters in my pocket.

edited to add the mode of impact, lol

[Commie Pinko Dirtbag]

60. Whoa! Slasher flick death!

Commie Pinko Dirtbag: At age 59 you will become lost during a road trip and wind up living out the movie "Wrong Turn". Sorry for ya.

[ContraBass Black]

61. ContraBass Black: At age 58...

... you will die from wounds delivered by a blender after trying to make your sixteenth magarita of the day. (And it's on 3:00pm, shame on you!)

Doesn't match me.

[ZombieNixon]

63. *snorts*

*real full name*: At age 72 you will be blown up by the pyrotechnics rigged at one of your "Still Not Dead" concerts.

*real first name only*: At age 71 you will die from an equipment malfunction in an exciting, fear based reality game show. Your death will receive the highest ratings of any episode of any reality show, ever.

ZombieNixon: At age 61 you will die fighting the Interplanetary War on Terrorism on Camp Harmony, Venus.

:rofl:

[BlueStorm]

64. Oh how apropos for me...

BlueStorm: At age 35 you will be trampled by a mob of rabid people at the opening of X-Men 17.

Since I love X-Men so much!! Especially Storm!!!

.html?seq=2

http://www.imdb.com/gallery/ss/0120903/11.html?path=gallery&path_key=0120903&seq=2

http://www.imdb.com/gallery/ss/0120903/12.html?seq=2

.html?path=gallery&path_key=0376994&seq=2

[BlueStorm]

65. Here's how DU will meet its' fate...

Democratic Underground: At age 21 while playing Street Fighter Omega at an arcade, you will be electrocuted by the headset. You will be the first such death in years.

Blue

[gr8dane_daddy]

66. Eerie...that's how I've always pictured it

Gr8Dane_Daddy: At age 72 you will be attacked by a pack of escaped lap dogs in your neighborhood and never be seen again.

[opiate69]

67. ROTF

Opiate69: At age 50 you will fall from the fifth floor window of a hotel while under the influence of Robitussin DM.

[malta blue]

69. LOL

malta blue: At age 79 you will fall into a tank at a large aquarium and be eaten by suckerfish.

[mwdem]

70. At age 91 you will die fighting the Global War on Terrorism in Mexico.

I can't wait!

[tk2kewl]

71. At age 67 you will take a near lethal dose of mescaline, wander the desert for six months...

At age 67 you will take a near lethal dose of mescaline, wander the desert for six months, and eventually be eaten by coyotes.

[Burma Jones]

72. Good News for Me, I get to live a Loooong time

New Beawr: At age 97 you will go down in a small raft, in your friend's pool, and subsequently drown.

[meegbear]

73. Hmmmmm ...

meegbear: At age 91 you finally kick the heroine habit! Congratulations. Unfortunately you stopped because you died from an overdose.

How many heroines a day would I need to become an addict? :shrug: