DU Confession

[AutumnMist]

Ok here it goes. I was diagnosed with Parkinson's about five months ago. I was down. Really down. I let the diagnoses rule what I did in my everyday life. For months. I mean at 35 how could this possibly be? I went back and forth with it. Ignored it, cried over it, and slept through it. One day I woke up and realized that I was spending days in bed at a time. Did I need to do that? Occasionally. But not always. I started to embrace what my lot in life was. The dark days didn't seem so dark when I thought about what I could do today before the disease really hit me full force. I could make my voice heard. Parkinson's isn't what I expected of course, but it didn't mean that it was worth nothing. That I was worth nothing. I would assume that if you asked anyone with a long term disability what one of the hardest things about their illness is? It would be the invisible status that many of us have to carry day to day. It sucks. Absolutely it does. I finally got to that point that I had to do something. Get up and do what I loved. Fighting through the tremors and the fatigue. Fighting through the awareness of other people noticing my physical "ticks". Knowing that not all people would understand what I was going through and loving them regardless. But most importantly loving myself regardless. I have finally reached that level of being ok. My God I am really going to be alright. And that is the most soul wrenching beautiful thing I could ever imagine. I have taught, played, and guided my daughter. I have tried to show her that illness is not the end of the road. Its just a curve in the interstate of life. I have kissed my husband and rejoiced in him being the man that he is. I have gotten to know a stepson that I never knew. I finally did it. Just got out of bed and lived my damn life! And I am so thankful and happy. I know this may seem like a rambling post. But I am really proud of where I am right now. I did it. Woo-hoo! I wanted to share with all of you. I hope that this post reaches you in good times and great health. If not...well its just another curve. We can get through it together. Thank you for listening. I just had to get this off my chest. I feel like I just reached another level that I never thought possible.

[Robeson]

1. Ramble on, AutumnMist, ramble on...

...I think we all learn something from your testimony, so ramble on...:hug:

[Wetzelbill]

2. yeah, that's cool

You keep fighting. That was something special what you just wrote. :)

[Guava Jelly]

3. You are just an inspiration you know that!

It would be easy to just waller in self pity.
To become defeated but you didn't and aren't !!!
I remember I think you telling me you had Parkinson's in one of my milestone post.
You sounded like you were starting to be in an ok place with it then.
I really admire your state of mind and would only hope that if something along those lines happened to me I would have the strength and mental clarity that you seam to have.
And I know some days will just suck!
but if you need someone to talk to you are welcomed to vent anytime.
:hug:

[Heidi]

4. You made my day.

What gift it is to browse the Lounge on a Saturday morning and fine yet another DU warrior woman. You _go_, gf. :thumbsup:

Recommended. :hi:

[Guava Jelly]

5. Kick Because I want everyone to read this!

:hug:

[YankeyMCC]

6. Thanks for sharing this

it is beautiful - as beautiful as the majestic views I struggle up mountains to experience - story to share.

[Callalily]

7. You truly are an inspiration AutumnMist

I love your analogy, curve in the interstate of life. We are all given such curves, and what we do with them, how we react to them truly shapes our lives, reflects upon our happiness.

Thanks for sharing your story.

[xchrom]

8. please allow me to woo-hoo with you --

:woohoo:

[lizziegrace]

9. ...

:hug:

Welcome back to life. Your daughter will learn so much from this *you*.

I'm so glad you posted. :)

[GoddessOfGuinness]

10. That is beautiful, Autumn Mist!

Thank you for sharing this gift with me! :hug:

[NewWaveChick1981]

11. AututmnMist, that is such a wonderful story...

:hug: I admire you for being able to take a bad situation and turn it into the best one possible. :hug: :pals: I think you're amazing!

I wish you only the best. :hug:

[BlueIris]

12. Woah. Good for you for rebounding so fast.

I think you just became my personal hero. Continued best of luck with your everything. You can ramble here anytime.

[graywarrior]

13. Wow. Just wow.

You never know how your written word can affect the reader. Personally, I've been ransacked by lots of unexpected teachers of life over the past few weeks. I can add you to my list. Thanks for the ramble....it was awesome. And it sounds like you will be fine when you are fine. I wish you nothing but happiness.

[CaliforniaPeggy]

14. My dear AutumnMist........

What a beautiful essay you have written here......I thank you with all my heart!

...a curve in the interstate of life..... Perfect!

You have learned the lessons so damn well......and we all need to learn them.........

I especially do........

I have a very close friend who has a terrible chronic illness, and I am sure he would identify with what you've said here.......He does not let being ill stop him from doing what he loves.....He only slows down when he cannot help it......I admire his courage, and yours, so damn much...

Thank you for posting this.........I am so glad I stopped in to read it.

:loveya: :hug: :loveya:

[buddhamama]

15. thank you

for sharing your story. It is an inspiration and a reminder. (((hugs))) AutumnMist. Peace and strength to you on your journey. :hug:

[Ellen Forradalom]

16. BIIIIG HUG

for you.

Just live your damned life. It's a good one!

Love!

[driver8]

17. That is a beautiful post. You are an amazing person, AutumnMist!

Now why can't posts from the lounge be on the "greatest page"??

This one should be...

Sending good thoughts and hugs your way, AutumnMist!

[auntAgonist]

18. AutumnMist

I'm so glad you've written here and shown us a bit of yourself. It's nice to meet you! I'm sure glad you've gotten out of bed and lived your (not so )damned life :)

You should be proud of who you are and where you are.

:hug:
aA
kesha

[Zomby Woof]

19. You are a star

Thank you for sharing your generous and wise spirit, and much support to you as you move forward. :hug:

[merh]

20. you RAWK AutumnMist

:hug:

thank you so very much for sharing with us and for being an inspiration. :pals:


:yourock: :woohoo: :bounce: :woohoo:

[Maestro]

21. Awesome outlook

and with that positive attitude you are going to go far. You are a GOOD person!

[Flying Dream Blues]

22. Wow. You've come a long way for only five months. You must

be a truly strong person, and I admire you for fighting through this illness so that it doesn't define your life. You're an inspiration! Have another beautiful day.

[ScreamingMeemie]

23. I now have no reason to feel sorry for myself in this cast anymore...

:hug:

Thank you for sharing that. You really put stuff into perspective.

[XemaSab]

24. Wow

This is a really inspirational post.

:hug: