Disputed Scattergories Response (Help!)

[Merrick]

For those familiar with the game, I submit this disputed ruling to you for review:

During a spirited round of the aforementioned game with my family, I put down "Phillips Head Screwdriver" as a response for the category (or Scattergory) 'Weapons' starting with the letter 'P' only to have my answer viciously vetoed by a 4-2 vote by two mentally challenged in-laws and my somewhat aged (and perhaps becoming a bit senile if this incident is any indication) parents.

So was I wrong to throw a complete fit, screaming invective and recriminations about the living room, ruining what had been a pretty pleasant weekend up to that point?

Keep in mind that the game endorses "clever" answers and the fact that I'd been a rather liberal judge of my opponents answers before this shocking betrayal transpired (for instance giving my father credit for the answer "Stale Pills" for the category: "Things Found In A Medicine Cabinet")

Thank you for your attention regarding this un-urgent matter.

[trof]

1. Philips Head can and has been used as a weapon.

You win.

[Merrick]

4. Totally

I sent an email to the offending parties that contained several links to news articles where people had killed people with screwdrivers demonstrating this fact, but they persist in their obstinance. Their argument is that screwdrivers aren't designed as weapons, but so what? If the letter was 'A' you could say the same thing about an axe since it's meant to chop wood, but that would be totally retarded, what with all the axe murderers walking about. To me, the absurdity is obvious, and I cannot and will not let it stand.

[eyesroll]

2. Go to a law library and look up 478 S.E.2d 379.

Smith v. State.

This is a murder case (appeal) in Georgia. The victim was killed by a phillips head screwdriver.


(I looked that up on Lexis just now, using "phillips head screwdriver weapon" in the natural language search box. I love my student account!)

[skygazer]

3. By those terms, just about anything could be called a weapon

Looking around my office, I see dozens of things - a lamp, my fax machine, an Ace bandage, a pen, my cell phone, a pillow and a can of compressed air, all of which could be used as a weapon.

None of them are. They just could be used as one. Same with a Phillips head screwdriver. I wouldn't give it to you either, especially if you threw a fit. ;)

[Merrick]

5. You're as goofy as my mother

She made mention of 'squirrels' and 'strawberries' (after the fact, thinking the letter was 's' and I'd responded 'screwdriver'). Strawberry? I say she watches too much Monty Python. Strawberries and squirrels don't have pointy ends made of metal that you can grasp in your hand and plunge into someone's head in a downward stabbing motion!

And I only threw a fit after they continued to fail to listen to plain reason.

[skygazer]

6. You asked

:shrug:

[Merrick]

7. See: reply#4

and stop disagreeing with me. I don't care for it.

[skygazer]

9. Which is why I do it

:evilgrin:

[Rabrrrrrr]

8. If they allowed "Stale Pills", then your answer was valid.

I'd even say that had they decided "Stale Pills" doesn't work, that your answer still works. Yours, at least, is a full name of an object; your father in law cheated by choosing an adjective that began with the necessary letter to then modify something else that did not meet the specific letter-based criterion of the scattergory at hand.

However, I guess the question is this: did they veto because they felt you were using a modifier (Phillips Head) to match the scattergory letter, or because they didn't think that a Phillips Head Screwdriver could be used as a weapon, or because they felt that the category should allow only those items that are designed and manufactured specifically to be used as weapons?

If it was the latter two, they are ass-boned wrong. If the former, they have a very weak case that I'd throw out of court.

[Merrick]

10. Ass-boned wrong in this case

They made NO mention of the modifier, only that screwdrivers aren't designed as weapons, which as I covered in my reply to another poster (reply #4) is a ridiculous argument since you could say the same for an axe, or even a knife.

and the 'stale pills' guy wasn't my father in-law, it was my own flesh and blood dad, which makes the betrayal even harder to stomach. Apparently my sister is the only one other than me in this family with a brain in their head.

[sendero]

18. Neither are icepicks..

... tell Trotsky about it :)

[HarukaTheTrophyWife]

11. You were completely in the right.

Anyway, everyone knows board games rip people apart, not bring them together.

Divorces have probably occured over Monopoly. Hell, the Iraq thing probably completely boils down to a Monopoly game gone wrong between Bush I and Saddam, and then everything just spiraled hopelessly out of control.

[Merrick]

13. True, and Scattergories is the worst

but my family is pretty close and invulnerable to such things. In fact, I think we enjoy that game in part because we like to yell and scream and argue in a way that everyone knows isn't personal, and it provides ample opportunity.

[rug]

12. By the same token, "plum" could be a weapon.

Anything can be a weapon, therefore your answer should be disallowed and only a conventional weapon should be answered.

You should have said "pike".

[Merrick]

14. And by the same token...

What would you answer if I gave you the choice of being hit with the business end of a phillips head screwdriver and a squishy fucking piece of fruit?

Now I was planning on emailing this thread to the offending parties and you're diluting my vote count, so knock it off.

[rug]

16. Try hammering a nail with a 9mm.

[sendero]

19. I'll tell ya what..

... you come after me with a plum and I'll wield a screwdriver. We'll see who walks away :)

[rug]

20. I once defended a guy on robbery charges who had a zucchini in his pocket

That made it armed robbery because he pointed it through his pocket.

Another guy was charged with aggravated assault. Use of a weapon made it aggravated. The weapon? The floor he was slamming the other guy's face into.

Anything can be a weapon, even if it defies common sense.

I still vote with the parents.

[sendero]

22. You'rd dodging the real question..

... nobody is going to hurt you with a plum or a zuchini. A screwdriver (whether slotted or Phillips) is pretty much a dagger only not quite as sharp. It is a natural weapon, having a handle to hold it with and a shank for the victim.

I'm not talking about the law, under the law anything can be a weapon, the law is an ass. I'm talking about the real world. A screwdriver is only slightly less deadly than a knife, and more deadly than a knife with a short blade.

[rug]

23. A screwdriver is more deadly but you can blind with a pencil.

Would you allow pencil? It starts with a p.

[sendero]

24. John Wayne Gacy.

... apparently killed many of his victims with a pen. You decide.

[rug]

25. Ok, it's not. Your turn.

You can strangle with a shoelace. You decide.

[sendero]

26. At least...

... you've come up with something that is debatable. A screwdriver or a plum are not.

[rug]

27. You win. A plum is a fruit and a screwdriver is a tool.

Now that I'm warmed up, I'm off to GD.

[nini]

15. LOL.. best post in a long time

hahahhahha


I say you were right.

[YankeyMCC]

17. I'm with you but I think you're missing the point of the game

It's all about getting people 'throwing fits', 'yelling profanities' and carrying on in attack or defense of their answers.

Those are the battles you gotta win not so much getting all the words filled in. :)

Your problem is apparently your tantrum technique wasn't effective on the other players. :)

[Merrick]

28. Thats because their heads are full of cement

mules all of them.

[YankeyMCC]

29. Well of course :)

You just have to figure out how to move people with cement filled heads.

Of course if you can do that it would've come in handy in the last presidential election getting through to the * supporters.

[Pithlet]

21. I think your family is right, technically.

A screwdriver isn't a weapon by definition. It can be used as one, but so can many things. Generally speaking, knives fall in the definition of weapon. Many are specifically designed for that purpose, unlike screwdrivers. But, that's not to say I wouldn't have let it slide if I had been in the game,and you'd been liberal with my answers. But, then again, it did get pretty heated the last time I played that game. The category was baby food, and it had to start with a K. My opponent claimed Karo Syrup qualified, because apparently people used to use that to make homemade formula. I wouldn't let that fly :D

[Merrick]

31. Who asked you?

I only want to hear from people who take my side.

Just kidding, but you say knife would qualify because some are made explicitly as weapons, but if you were to apply the same dialectic as my adversaries, then it would follow that only answers that specify a kind of knife that is designed to kill (i.e. hunting knives or switchblades) would be acceptable, otherwise we'd have to assume that you were talking about the majority of knives that are made to cut steak and carrots or are used to whittle blocks of wood into little sailing vessels

[Redstone]

30. I've have vetoed your "clever" ass, too. In a heartbeat.

And yes, stale pills ARE found in almost every medicine cabinet. So there.

(Public service advisory: Never keep medicine in the medicine cabinet. The high humidity in the bathroom is not good for medicine.)

Redstone