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How should I woooo a Single Mother of two?

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45th Med Donating Member (559 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Dec-20-03 12:34 AM
Original message
How should I woooo a Single Mother of two?
We went out on kinda a first date last night to a Japanese resturant for Sushi. It was in the company of others, my Father's Christmas Party for his employees.

In the course of dinner, my nose started to bleed....lol. Bad omen?

I gave her my Christmas present, the Buena Vista Club DVD Documentary.....she's from Cuba.

She's such a sweetheart. She got me a hot towel and a club soda and helped me dab a spot of blood off my trousers.

I want to meet her 10 year old son and take them to dinner. Her baby is too young to go out (9 months). But, she is going to the hospital this weekend with her sister who is delivering.....she's past due and I called her today for her to call me when she goes to the hospital and I'll meet her there and bring her dinner or I could take her out for dinner.

How should I continue?
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HEyHEY Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Dec-20-03 12:35 AM
Response to Original message
1. Respect for sure
Treat her like the hard-working mother she is.
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45th Med Donating Member (559 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Dec-20-03 12:37 AM
Response to Reply #1
2. I absolutely do!
We work together and she is a Banquet Captain. I had been tasked this semester with driving her around town for her catering. I help her out with everything and give her my absolute full attention.

She's really a sweetheart.
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gmoney Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Dec-20-03 12:38 AM
Response to Original message
3. Where's the baby daddy?
Edited on Sat Dec-20-03 12:39 AM by gmoney
Where's the baby daddy at after only 9 months? (Or maybe 17 months)

The family sounds extremely fertile... take protection.

Rod Tidwell: I feel for you, man. But a real man wouldn't shoplift the pootie from a single mom. 
Jerry Maguire: I didn't shoplift the pootie. 
(Rod gives him a long look) 
Jerry Maguire: Alright. I shoplifted the pootie. 

Oh, and if you want to get anywhere with her, treat her like shit.
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45th Med Donating Member (559 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Dec-20-03 12:39 AM
Response to Reply #3
4. Daddy went deadbeat.....beat feet.
She's extremely fertile! And beautiful to boot!
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Missy Vixen Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Dec-20-03 12:41 AM
Response to Original message
5. WOW! She'll fall in love with you!
>How should I continue?<

You are doing pretty well already!

I think it's terrific that you want to meet her children, and that you've been so supportive of her and her family. I'll bet it means so much to her.

Be sure and find out the stuff she likes (you're already on the trail, that's for sure!) and surprise her every once in awhile with a flower, a book, bring her favorite beverage to her as another surprise (I'm thinking coffee, soda, whatever,) something inexpensive, but shows that you care.

You are DA MAN. She won't be able to resist you!

Good luck, and you're doing fine!

Julie
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7th_Sephiroth Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Dec-20-03 01:31 AM
Response to Original message
6. nosebleed in a japaneese restauraunt while with a woman
you had a perverted thought, diddent you, the japaneese believe (kinda its from an old saying, it shows up in anime alot) than nosebleeds are caused by perverted thoughts, naughty boy.
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45th Med Donating Member (559 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Dec-20-03 06:43 PM
Response to Reply #6
15. Funny, cause we were looking at the Dallas Observer......
in the Massage section and talking about a Colonic Massage ad. LOL!
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sasquatch Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Dec-20-03 01:47 AM
Response to Original message
7. Are you ready for that responsibilty?
Be careful if she's Cuban she might be a Batista freak or at the least a Repug:( Think long and hard before dating a woman with kids OK:)
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grasswire Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Dec-20-03 01:50 AM
Response to Original message
8. what are your intentions?
Getting laid? Or finding a family you can marry into?

Please think carefully about whether you imply something you're not prepared to continue. Don't promise her anything you won't follow through on. It would be cruel to the children.
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nothingshocksmeanymore Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Dec-20-03 01:51 AM
Response to Original message
9. Sounds like you are doing fine
Make sure you include her children in things and form a relationship with them. Hold the baby and play with it. If you are going to be around her, it makes a difference for all of you (you, her and the kids) that you be friends with them and that they are not intimidated or feel out of place with you.

You sound like a charming guy. Best of luck to you. Keep us posted :D

btw... do you like kids?

Oh and on the hospital thing....see what works for her...she'll let you know...heck if the cafeteria food is good you can just eat there.
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JCMach1 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Dec-20-03 03:16 AM
Response to Original message
10. Do you do dishes???
Good luck...

Just remember to keep it real... and be realistic about the situation.
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maggrwaggr Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Dec-20-03 03:22 AM
Response to Original message
11. I married a woman who had a kid
when I met her.

Just be cool, treat her like a sexy single woman and not a mom. Let her call the shots 100% regarding the kids, when you meet them etc.

Moms want a break from being moms. Offer to pay for the babysitter, take her out, get her away from the diapers, etc.

At the same time, she's gonna miss the kids like crazy the second she's away from them. Don't take it personally.

And don't forget the kids always come first to her. You're 2nd. And tha'ts how it should be.
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Lisa0825 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Dec-20-03 03:32 AM
Response to Original message
12. Be careful not to pressure her about meeting the 10 yr old....
Many single moms, including my best friend, are VERY protective of their kids, as far as introducing them to the men they date goes. She won't let her son meet anyone for at least a couple months of dating, and only if she feels he is going to be a long-term and possibly permanent part of their life. I have seen her son mourn after his mom and her bf broke up, and it was very hard on him. In fact, long after two breakups, her son would ask if he could call the ex-bfs. Don't get close to her son, unless you plan on really being a part of his life.
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45th Med Donating Member (559 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Dec-20-03 06:57 PM
Response to Reply #12
19. I can understand that and.....
I have not asked to see them. I always ask how they are and I am ready to meet them when/if she feels comfortable with that.
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The Magistrate Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Dec-20-03 03:32 AM
Response to Original message
13. Two Essentials, Sir
Housework.

Diaper changing.

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45th Med Donating Member (559 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Dec-20-03 06:45 PM
Response to Reply #13
16. I'm all down with that!
I'm a great cook and a great cleaner! I'm all down with the responsiblities of raising kids.
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PeakOil2008 Donating Member (200 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Dec-20-03 03:43 AM
Response to Original message
14. Best of luck to you. You will need it.
I've been there before, and unfortunately, it didn't end happily for us. :( Her baby's father's influence was still very real, and very brutal. He had been quite abusive towards her during their relationship, and she very understandably wasn't coping well with that fact, and the fact that she now has lasting ties to this man (i.e. child support). I also ultimately realized that I couldn't deal with another man's influence in a very personal aspect of my life. We broke up a few years ago, but it still hurts even now.

I would say that if you're going into this, definitely proceed with caution, and think things through!
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45th Med Donating Member (559 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Dec-20-03 06:54 PM
Response to Reply #14
18. I won't stand for an abusive father and I am well versed in self-defense!
I am a very protective person, I won't stand a father who is abusive. I can handle a man who want's to see his kid and be in his life and I'll be a friend to that kind of man. But, I won't tolerate an abusive man.
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Kamika Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Dec-20-03 06:50 PM
Response to Original message
17. FLOWERS !!!
Edited on Sat Dec-20-03 07:18 PM by Kamika
Bring them, not too many but woo her.

Oh and yeah dont preassure her about her kid.. he'll probably hate you anyway and that won't work to your advantage.

Uhm what else.. call her mami in bed :p
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