What problems can we blame on Bill Clinton?

[Deep13]

The answer, according to right-wing media, is all of them.

What specific problems are all Clinton's fault?

[Deep13]

1. Clinton made by salad dressing much too tart.

Damn him!

[taterguy]

2. Did he also make you type by when you meant to type my?

[Deep13]

3. Yes, that bastard!

His staff must have sneaked in and rearranged my keyboard, then changed it back after I typed that.

[taterguy]

4. He'll stop at nothing to squash his foes

If you don't hear from me for a while it means his goons have tracked me down and are roughing me up

[Critters2]

5. I'm wicked tired today

because Clinton woke my dog up in the middle of the night, which woke me up in the middle of the night unable to fall back asleep.

Bastard.

[Initech]

6. Blame him for the demise of Napster

It's not Lars Ulrich's fault! :evilgrin:

[Jamastiene]

21. Oooo. I aint' touchin'

that one with a ten foot pole. :evilgrin:

[billyskank]

7. I can't get my program to work

Obviously Clinton's fault.

[Left Is Write]

8. Poor writing in soap operas; repeated big-screen remakes

of tv shows and previously made movies; GERD; dress socks worn with sandals; wrinkle-free shirts that wrinkle anyway; mushy, overcooked pasta; tanning creams; coffee that goes cold too fast; bad beer; the ignorance of people regarding the use of cast iron cookware; Pairs Hilton's popularity; high gas prices; the dearth of pint cartons of buttermilk available in the grocery store; underripe bananas; the wrong size skirt being sent by the mail order store; remote controls without batteries; lint; excess cat and dog hair; cracker crumbs on the floor; burned-out lightbulbs; mosquito bites; TVLand's overuse of marathons; socks that go missing in the dryer.

Did I leave anything out?

[miss_american_pie]

15. Shower gift registries

:D :hi:

[Left Is Write]

18. See? I knew I forgot something.

[blondeatlast]

41. Nicole Richie's food issues? nt

[Left Is Write]

46. Possibly, though wouldn't he be more likely to buy her a burger?

[stanwyck]

9. Clinton gave guys who like sex

too much credibility. Now, lots of guys are more open about liking sex.
Damn him.

[blondeatlast]

43. Even Republicans? Naaaaah, couldn't be... nt

[Reverend_Smitty]

10. I blame him for my seasonal allergies

I never had them before he was elected president and now every year around this time my nose gets all stuffy...coincidence? I think not!

[AlCzervik]

11. i've got really bad cramps, obviously Clinton's fault.

[Deep13]

13. obviously

:grr:

[datasuspect]

12. nirvana

and the whole grunge thing.

[mad-mommy]

14. In dad's house...

it's what can we blame GW for, and that is just about everything.

[Yavin4]

16. He Made FEMA an Efficient Well-Run Agency

Which set expectations too high. Thus, when Katrina hit, people actually believed that their federal government would provide emergency services.

Damn you Clinton!!

[Debi]

17. For sure

It' snake on a mutha f$%&#ng plane! That's ALL Bill Clinton

[Deep13]

20. That's a seal, not a snake!

See the flipper?

[Debi]

22. Then why does the link say 'snake'?

:shrug:

Bill Clinton lied and told me the seal was a snake :cry:

[Deep13]

24. That asshole!

[Debi]

26. Bastard

:mad:

[GoddessOfGuinness]

19. I've got heel-spur syndrome because of him

He got me feeling good about life, and I started exercising every day. Because he was such a great president, I walked with tremendous enthusiasm, pounding my heels with gusto.

The bastid knew...I tell you, he KNEW this would be the result!

I feel so betrayed!

[Jamastiene]

23. We only love sex so much because he did.

Yeah, we wouldn't have even known what sex was had he not had it while in the oval office. :sarcasm: I would probably have never gotten laid without him. I probably shouldn't admit that, but hey, what the fuck? What can I say? I like women too. I sure can't blame him for liking women, except that he's married and Hillary is too beautiful, IMHO, to cheat on.

[Deep13]

27. "...Hillary is too beautiful, IMHO, to cheat on."

She looks even better in person.

[Jamastiene]

31. I'm so jealous.

You saw her in person? When? Where? I'd have to work not to drool all over myself thinking about her if I ever met her. She is one gorgeous, strong, democratic woman. :loveya:

[Deep13]

33. Twice:...

At a book signing in 2004. That was very quick. The second time was at a Sherrod Brown fundraiser in Cleveland in June.

[Radical Activist]

25. herpes

It started with him. I'm sure of it.

[datasuspect]

28. no it was robin williams

he gave to my aunt in 1978 when she was cocaine groupie.

[Dr Fate]

29. Teenage boys are now obsessed with oral sex for the 1st time in history.

Before Clinton, they were perfectly content with mere sports, academics and abstinence.

[Jamastiene]

32. LOL.

You are on the ball today.

:rofl:

[Radical Activist]

30. media consolidation

Well, that one really is his fault.

[ghostsofgiants]

40. Don't ask, don't tell.

NAFTA
Defense of Marriage Act
DMCA

[blondeatlast]

42. True and not at all funny. His apology just didn't help me get over it,

either.

Still, this is becoming quite a funny thread.

[Anarcho-Socialist]

34. Bill Clinton was the reason why 'Enterprise' sucked so badly n/t

[hedgehog]

39. What about Voyager?

He must have had something to do with that!

[Gidney N Cloyd]

44. That was Hillary.

Female captain and all.

[begin_within]

35. NNNNNNN AAAAAAAA FFFFFFFFF TTTTTTTT AAAAAAAAA

Never enough free tits & ass.

[Arugula Latte]

36. Toenail fungus.

Yep. Clenis is behind that one, too.

[hedgehog]

37. Hillary Clinton.

Damned if we nominate her, damned if we don't.

[Crabby Appleton]

38. confusion over what the meaning of "is" is

[catbert836]

45. The "welfare reform"

that disenfranchised millions of poor Americans. Oh, and NAFTA as well.

Or were you posting in jest?

[El Fuego]

47. It's supposed to rain all weekend! On Labor Day weekend!

Daw, Clinton again! x(

[SOteric]

48. Library fines are too high.

And you know that's got to be Clinton's fault as Bush can barely be arsed to read.

[NoPasaran]

49. Clinton caused the breakup of the Beatles

Yoko had nothing to do with it.

[NoPasaran]

50. And then he killed Elvis

[NoPasaran]

51. And Judy Garland

[Catbird]

52. Wal-Mart

They are both from Arkansas so there must be some connection.

[Kali]

53. You forgot "ANY PROBLEM YOU CAN THINK OF"

Either it was the Clintons (yes both) fault or they did it too.

[NMMNG]

54. Option 9,

and that damned budget surplus. We simply can't accept that sort of thing! :sarcasm: