Alternate State Mottos - Add Some

[MrScorpio]

New Jersey - "Toxic Sludge? Fuggidaboutit!"

Florida - "Welcome To America's Penis"

Rhode Island - "Small But Wiry"

Wisconsin - "Who Cut The Cheese?"

Washington - "Our Sasquatch Can Kick Your Chupacabra's Ass"

[Richardo]

1. My fave is an old one from Molly Ivins (suggested license plate motto):

"Texas: Fuck Alaska!"

[Taverner]

2. California

We're smarter than you. And better looking too. Go away.

[HarukaTheTrophyWife]

3. These are from NJ t-shirts:

New Jersey: Only the Strong Survive (I have this one)

And I need to get these...
Welcome to NJ. Don't worry, we hate you, too.
New Jersey: The Best Goddamned Country in the World

[NewWaveChick1981]

35. North Carolina's official state motto is "To Be, Rather Than to Seem"

OOOOOH-kay.... :eyes: It really should be, "Too Many Fundies for Our Own Good." :P

[billyskank]

82. Yeah, but

you got NewWaveChick1981, so that makes up for it. :)

[KamaAina]

4. La. and/or Miss: "Hey, George! Remember us? We're still here!"

Texas: "99.999 Percent Of It Isn't Crawford" :evilgrin:

[BlueIris]

61. Woah, man. That one is NICE.

[Richard Steele]

5. "IOWA: Gateway to Nebraska"

I think that was an old Letterman gag that stuck with me.

[Critters2]

32. I've always heard it: Illinois, Gateway to Iowa" nt

[MrScorpio]

6. West Virginia - "The Moonshine State"

[Guava Jelly]

7. Kansas as bigoted as you think.. saw this on a bumper sticker

:)

[idgiehkt]

8. North Carolina -- "Don't Move Here"

that's really only for Asheville but the whole state could use it.

[NewWaveChick1981]

41. Have to agree!

:hi: :rofl:

[mwooldri]

75. Can't agree on that but I can do this: "NC: The dug-in-heels State".

Sometimes people just don't want to change things around here because things are nicer the way they are.

/Mark.

[TheMightyFavog]

9. Wisconsin: Eat Cheese or Die.

End of Line.

[NMMNG]

10. Arkansas: Literacy Ain't Everything

California: By 30, Our Women Have More Plastic Than Your Honda

Maryland: If You Can Dream It, We Can Tax It

Montana: Land Of The Big Sky, The Unabomber, Right-Wing Crazies, And Very Little Else

Nevada: Whores and Poker!

New Jersey: You Want A ##$%##! Motto? I Got Yer ##$%##! Motto Right Here!

North Carolina: Tobacco Is A Vegetable

Utah: Our Jesus Is Better Than Your Jesus

Virginia: Who Says Government Stiffs And Slackjaw Yokels Don't Mix?

West Virginia: One Big Happy Family ... Really!

[ElboRuum]

50. Delaware...

"Come for our tax-free shopping, stay for our... our... OK, we got nothing."

[NMMNG]

55. Delaware:

We have tax-free shopping but our tolls more than make up for that.

[Deep13]

11. Ohio: the Mississippi of the North

Alabama: Hot enough for ya'?

Arkansas: Bet you miss Clinton now!

Kansas: We ain't descended from no monkeys.

[LynneSin]

15. Ohio....

WHERE EVERY VOTE COUNTS

If you're a rich white wealthy landover - the rest don't

[HughBeaumont]

36. Duh High-Ah. We may be stupid but we sure is dumb!

[ScreamingMeemie]

70. Ohio: The state you drive through to get to other states.

:hi:

[Jokerman]

12. Indiana - Now over 75% Klan Free!

Although that one might be a little hard to prove.

[hippiechick]

42. Indiana: At least we're not Kentucky!

:rofl:

[XemaSab]

13. California: Like, dude!

California: You've seen it, now go home.

[MrCoffee]

14. Michigan: It's Like Canada, If Canada Were Squalid.

[sarge43]

48. Michigan: The big frozen left hand in the soggy mitt

[XNASA]

16. Illinois

"Rachel Welch, Rock Hudson, Cindy Crawford, Harrison Ford, Miles Davis, Richard Pryor, and 79 Nobel Prizes awarded to the University of Chicago. How anyone can claim that Californians are more beautiful and smarter than us is beyond all rational thought."

[LynneSin]

17. Illinois: Home of the new cursed Red Sox team - the Chicago Cubs

:D

[XNASA]

18. Say what you will.

At least the Cubs are in the National League.

The American League is boring. What can I say, some people like checkers, and some enjoy chess.

[LynneSin]

19. I enjoy teams that go to the world series once every 20-30 years

:P

[Richardo]

20. You're a Pirates fan!!

:thumbsup:

[LynneSin]

21. Cincinnati Reds

:D

[Deep13]

23. Plus those Chicago folks know how to eat.

No tofu burgers with bean sprouts there.

[Critters2]

34. Some of the best veg restaurants around are in Chicago nt

[Deep13]

53. Figures. They have pretty much everything.

[huskerlaw]

80. Alas,

you'll need a stretch Hummer to stick that bad-boy on...

[Deep13]

22. New York: Enough with the Seinfeld References!

NH: Live free or, um, not. I don't care either way.

TN: Git 'er done!

KY: Twangy music and plenty of Bouron.

MA: Let's see how many more presidential elections we can lose.

ME: A-a-a-a-ah, yuh.

Hawaii: More than just a 70s cop show.

NV: Just go ahead an do whatever you want.

[tigereye]

24. welcome to Pennsylvania - Our Roads Suck

( well, they are a little better, lately.)

[martymar64]

25. Idaho - Famous Neo-nazis

Florida - The Flying Cockroach State

New Mexico - The Pretentious Art State

Arizona - Welcome to Hell

Washington - The Soggy State

California - Let's do lunch!

[bumblebee1]

26. PA-The pothole state.

Pa- Drive in and lose your car.

[LanternWaste]

27. Texas

"No Books Allowed"

"8 Million People and 7 Last Names..."

"Manners? What Fer?"

"Polysilla... poleesyllabul... big words frowned on"

"Ah tell yew whut"


Hey... I was born here and live here. I'm allowed to say this stuff. :)

[sarge43]

28. NH - Live, Freeze, then Die.

VT - 300,000 cows can't be wrong.

I can't claim these; they've been kicking around for years.

[RetroLounge]

29. We put the Sin in Wisconsin!

:D

RL

[KurtNYC]

30. Missouri loves company nt

[warrens]

31. Alabama: You ain't from round here, is you ,boy?

[Critters2]

33. Illinois--One Great Big Effing Subdivision nt

[LibertyLover]

37. Maryland - crabs are our middle name

West Virginia - 1 million citizens; 5 last names
New Jersey - a turnpike runs through it.

[Phillycat]

38. "Pennsylvania: two cool cities surrounded by Kentucky".

:scared:

[MissMillie]

39. Massachusetts: "Yankees Suck"

:silly:

[sarge43]

47. Massachusetts: Yea Bosox because no one else will have 'em

[ElboRuum]

51. California

"Botox isn't a choice... It's a lifestyle."

[bicentennial_baby]

56. Massachusetts: Yeah we just drive this way...Deal with it

[YankeyMCC]

74. We don't drive we aim

:)

[bicentennial_baby]

57. Massachusetts: Drinking and Driving, the State Sport

:P

[sarge43]

63. Tail gating at 75mph. It's the MA way.

[begin_within]

40. South Carolina: "White Trash Cookin' Done Right!"

[mwooldri]

76. SC: "Not as Liberal as North Carolina".

[momophile]

43. Colorado - "Columbine and JonBenet - Beat That!" nt

[Tikki]

44. California....

California's been good to me. Hope it don't fall into the sea....


...props to Mr. Tom Petty

Tikki

[Initech]

45. California - Learn to swim, I'll see you in Arizona Bay

Props to Tool for that one!

[NC_Nurse]

78. They got it from

Bill Hicks.

[MiniMandaRuth]

46. My home state of Washington:

"Don't like the weather? Wait five minutes."

[ElboRuum]

49. More...

New Hampshire: "You know our old motto? Well we must be doing a lot of dying, because we're not living very free these days."

Pennsylvania: "You've got an angry, drunk Philly sports fan in Pennsylvania, and he wants a word with your out-of-state a**"

Florida: "Vote for who you want, we won't count it right"

Washington: "Yep, it's still f***ing raining"

California: "Generating Republican celebrity politicians since 1967"

Texas: "We keep our Democrats underground (it puts the lotion on its skin or else it gets the hose again...)"

North Dakota: "Don't feel bad... we don't know our state capital, either"

Michigan: "Laying off thousands while making billions"

[ElboRuum]

52. Illinois...

"Chicago... the rest of it we just kind of ignore"

[MrScorpio]

54. Colorado - "The Western Fundie Empire"

Ohio - "Our Rivers Are No Longer On Fire:

Iowa - "The Cornball State"

Alaska - "A Better Class Of Drunken Outdoorsman"

[Buddyblazon]

58. Wisconsin-Smell the dairy air!

Colorado - Welcome to Colorado...now go home. (we're serious about this one).

California - DUDE!

Wyoming - Break like the wind.

New Jersey - When your girlfriend says "kiss me where it stinks"...bring her to New Jersey.

Alabama - What the fuck is cooooth?

Illinois - Truckers...go away.

Ohio - The blow job state.

Iowa - Corn...that is all.

Texas - Hey enough from us...what do YOU think of us?

[Benfea]

59. "Illinois: Please don't pronounce the 's'"

Quote from Dave Barry.

He also said that Canada is "a small country in the vicinity of Buffalo, NY." ;)

[fishwax]

60. Wyoming--we're not here right now, but if you'll please leave your

name and number, we'll call you back.

[sarge43]

73. Wyoming: It's not the end of the world, but you can see it from here

[BlueIris]

62. Oregon: It's Either the Wet, Western Stupid or the Dry, Eastern Stupid.

Your choice.

[dback]

71. Oregon: Hotcakes and Topless Dancing!

Oregon: No, you're pronouncing it wrong.

Oregon: Don't tell us what to do, we'll fuck things up ourselves!

Oregon: That gap between San Francisco and Seattle.

Oregon: Because after the revolution, everyone will need a yurt!

[Commie Pinko Dirtbag]

64. Arizona:

Our four seasons are Hot, Fucking Hot, Hot as Hell, and Nuclear Fusion.

[Rosie1223]

72. Arizona:

But it's a dry heat

[sarge43]

65. Maine: Don't ask; you won't like the answer

[Arkham House]

66. New Jersey: Gateway to Mordor

[sarge43]

67. Florida: The South's answer to New Jersey

[idgiehkt]

69. LOL

perfect.

[RedStateShame]

68. Kentucky: If You Have a Vice, We Make It.

[mwooldri]

77. Texas: "Can we have our idiot back now please?" (n/t)

[Gidney N Cloyd]

79. Illinois: Chicago and Mississippi all rolled into one.

[sarge43]

81. Welcome to NH: Leave your money, go away.