Post a Rapture Haiku!

[Arugula Latte]

Here is mine:

Sucked up by Jebus
But a nagging thought remains:
Is my stove still on?

[Haole Girl]

1. I tried, but mine were just whaay to stupid to share!

But, I'll kick this thread for you. :hi:

[Arugula Latte]

14. ...

KC2's Haiku
Didn't make it to the thread
But thanks for the kick!

:hi:

[Deja Q]

2. There was a man named Enos...

:hide:

[Cathyclysmic]

3. ...

Not ev'ry man can
Be Obi-Wan Kenobi.
Get a hobby, putz.

[Deja Q]

4. Everyone needs a hobby...

especially if honey's involved. :D

[miss_american_pie]

5. Eh

God so loved the world,
he raised up the self-righteous.
Thanks from us sinners.

[liberalitch]

6. Here's one:

Four horsemen arrive
Even they must dodge gulping trucks,
Unmanned at rapture

[KansDem]

7. Self delete

:hi:

[KansDem]

8. Here's mine...

Heard this might happen,
Floating skyward, buttnaked.
Unbelievable.

[Arugula Latte]

9. Another:

Fundies flyin' up
Their pasty white asses and
Naughty bit dangle

[Mad_Dem_X]

44. LOL!

:spray:

[deutsey]

10. Nothing will happen

Not today, not tomorrow
Nothing will happen

[Gatchaman]

11. Here's one

Not gonna happen
Quit living in a dream world
Have a better life

[Arugula Latte]

12. Here I go again:

Raptured to Heaven
Surrounded by fundy freaks
Correction: It's Hell

[Bossy Monkey]

13. All the nutjobs wait/for their mighty Lord to call/Never quite happens n/t

[Richard Steele]

15. Soaring to Heaven/ finally free of all these/ Goddamned Fundie jerks.

I'm not Japanese.
And certainly no poet;
so SUE me, OK?

[KamaAina]

16. Here goes...

August twenty-two
The hour is growing late
Why am I still here?

[Arugula Latte]

17. Oh, ye of little faith!

We must be patient
And wait. And wait. And wait. And
wait. And wait. And wait.

[GoddessOfGuinness]

18. Haiku

Rapture, please come soon.
Get them the hell out of here!
Rapture, PLEASE come SOON!

[Arugula Latte]

23. Heh heh.

For some reason, I'm reminded of the Chipmunks singing: "Hurry, Christmas, Don't Be Late." :thumbsup:

[Elidor]

19. LOL!

Naked fundies! Fly!
God will suck us to the sky!
Me? I'm staying. Bye!

[Arugula Latte]

24. Oooh. Extra points for RHYMING!

:applause:

[tinfoil tiaras]

20. OKay, here's mine

We sold everything
And stood next to the Shell Station
Waiting to be gone


Ehhh...LAME. Sorry :(

[Arugula Latte]

21. No, no. Not lame!

Me likee! :)

[tinfoil tiaras]

26. Aw, thanks! I got another one,

Just for yoU! :D :hi:

Orgasmic war sounds
Make our Christian Family™ glad
The end is very near

I think this one's better, though... :D

[Arugula Latte]

31. Heh heh.

Like that one, too! :thumbsup:

[sakabatou]

22. OK

I waited today
To be in heaven with God.
Damn. I'm left behind.

[Wheezy]

25. yup

Index says we're safe
So that there means, 'hit the dirt!'
Shoulda waxed my truck.

[antigone382]

27. A rush from beneath

I'm being raptured right now!
Nevermind, just gas...

[WritingIsMyReligion]

28. LOL.

:rofl:

[antigone382]

29. glad to be of service...

Here's another:

Angels in white coats,
Padded walls in my mansion,
This MUST be Heaven!

[struggle4progress]

30. I save my dollars / so they can go to heaven / With me and my car

[Arugula Latte]

32. Otra vez:

I sold all my crap
Told the bossman to shove it ...
What's that date again?

[ComerPerro]

33. OK

Lets drive SUVs
and start wars we can't finish
It won't matter soon.

[ComerPerro]

34. Another

What kind of a God
lets assholes get to heaven?
I will stay here, thanks.

[ComerPerro]

35. And another

Rapture was today
I was left behind but, hey,
Check out my new car.

[ComerPerro]

36. Still more

Man-made Judgement Day?
Rapture triggered by humans?
Oh shit! God looks pissed!

[ComerPerro]

37. I gotta stop

We waited in chruch
But the rapture never came.
Hey! Where did Steve go?

[ComerPerro]

38. But I can't stop

If we all ascend
far from our bodies, from Earth,
Why'd we get dressed up?

[ComerPerro]

39. Hands... writing... can't... stop them... NOOOO

If the preacher says
Wordly things won't matter soon
Why does he need cash?

[Arugula Latte]

40. Well, well, well. Someone was busy last night!

:D

Good job! :thumbsup:

[ComerPerro]

41. I just kept writing

but maybe I'll be pro-rapture
Then I can be saved.

[LynneSin]

42. Here's mine

January First
No wait now June Six oh six
Perhaps now Next Month

[auburngrad82]

43. Here's mine

Left behind again...
Wait... is anyone missing?
Just that Muslim kid...



Liberal bumper stickers

[denverbill]

45. Here's mine

I fly to meet God
Do they get FOX in Heaven
Wait, can I go back?