The RetroLounge Auction Starts Here and Now!

[RetroLounge]

Okay, here's the deal. I'm broke. I'm desperate. I'm not proud. I'm less than broke. I have Negative Assets. HUGE Liabilities pouring thru the roof. Already dipped deep into my retirement fund. I have already sold off most of my stuff, including 2 classic cars, a house full of antiques and collectibles, and anything else of value that was liquid enough to move out fast. I'm gonna lose my house and car and credit rating (what's left of it) and may be looking at homelessness again if this keeps up. (or maybe i'm exaggerating, but probably not.) Tons of debt, house for sale for 90 days now without an offer, large tax bill looming, paying the mortgage, 2 rents, 2 car payments, day care, utilities, etc. Working 50 hours a week. Also supporting my 2 kids and their mother too, even though we don't live together. Yes, she works, but it isn't enough anymore.

So with the same suggestion (and dare) coming from multiple places, including a few of you nasty lounge denizens, here's the deal:

I am putting myself up for auction.

That's correct. Me. RetroLounge. Up for auction. For a weekend. All yours.

There will be a reserve price that is kept secret (like eBay). You can PM me your offer and any pertinent information you wish to share, such as what service you need. Your bid will be apart from and in addition to transportation to and from the location you choose. We can meet there. We can come here. We can meet somewhere else. And on an agreed upon date, I will be all yours for the weekend. In any reasonable and (legal) capacity you desire. Winner will be kept a secret unless that person wants to announce.

Cleaning? Okay.
Cooking? No sweat.
Nanny? Sure.
Got an itch? I'll scratch it.
Dog Walker? Woof.
House Painting? Can do.
Lawn work? Fine.
Wash your car? Gladly.
Escort on a date. Hell yeah.
Just want to hang and party like rock stars? Dude!

Anything at all you desire. Within legal and agreed upon boundaries. and anything decided upon at a later time once i get there. Hell, I'm easy...

Auction is open to all DU'ers of legal voting age, any gender, any orientation. 10% of bid price will be donated to DU.

So let the bidding begin. Good luck, and please only use PM's for bids.







:hi:

RL

[wildhorses]

1. holy shit DUDE...you are SMOKIN'!! and I mean it!!

as in :wtf: are you smoking? :freak::smoke:



I wish I could afford to play this game...

[Deja Q]

2. I wish I could afford to play it too...

What if we pitched in funds? :D

Oh, I don't care what he smokes. I think he's SMOKIN'! :7

[wildhorses]

4. well. could be interesting....three is an INTERESTING number

doncha think:evilgrin:

[Deja Q]

6. And the things I am thinking!

:woohoo:

It wouldn't take long to clean my apartment! :D

[wildhorses]

8. yeah, and I got 10 acres of lawn work that needs

special attention...

[miss_american_pie]

3. I can attest to a few of those services

If anyone has any questions. :evilgrin:

[wildhorses]

5. yeah, I do....

what about the panda:silly:

[miss_american_pie]

7. What about the panda?

He lives in the fireplace. During the day. :D

[Haole Girl]

9. Does Mrs RL know about this?

Edit: I read it more closely, now, and see you don't live together. Sorry, I remember some pic where I thought you 2 were together.

[RetroLounge]

12. She lives upstairs

and yes, she knows. She said for the right price, she'd do it too :D

RL

[lost-in-nj]

10. SWOON.............

WOW
to bad you live to far away.
Maybe thats a good thing, Mr. lost would be kinda upset ;)




lost

[SammyWinstonJack]

11. .

:yoiks:

[lavenderdiva]

13. Locking

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