What can you tell me about Barbara Coloroso

[TrogL]

...and her thoughts about raising children.

I've googled and not come up with much. Somebody's trying to club me over the head with her (figuratively) and I need ammo.

Her website links to (http://www.iasd.com/) The Institute for Affective Skills Development.

This person mentions "backbone parents", apparently something out of Kids are Worth It http://www.thewellspring.com/cat/Adult_books/kids_are_worth_it.html

She's also written the bully, the bullied and the bystander http://www.montrealmirror.com/ARCHIVES/2002/092602/book.html

Freeper?

[laundry_queen]

1. I dont' think so.

A friend of mine had the pleasure of attending one of her workshops. From what I know she's very anti-authoritarianism and anti-spanking. Many of my fellow lefty attachment parenting moms like her books.
HTH.

[TrogL]

3. I've got a copy of her bullying one

I borrowed it from a friend. I'm going to look at it tonight.

[hunter]

2. Context? It's always about context.

Swiped from her web page:

HANDLING MISTAKES

1. ADMIT IT TO YOURSELF
• What you did to cause it (I…)
• NO EXCUSES

2. DECIDE WHAT TO DO
• To fix this situation
• To do it more effectively next time

3. TELL OTHERS INVOLVED
• You recognize inconvenience caused
• Say what you did to cause it (I…)
• Say how you’ll fix this situation
• Say how you’ll do it more effectively next time

4. DO IT

http://www.iasd.com/Lesson13.pdf

Now let's see how this advice can really screw somebody up...

Faulty premise: It's a mistake (or evil, or whatever...) to be lesbian.

Now hammer it in. "Fix" the situation by getting a boyfriend and dumping your girlfriend. Run through an increasingly draconian cycle of "fixing" the situation until your boyfriend jumps out of your moving car, your girlfriend tries to kill herself, and a dirty rotten evil schmuck of a pimp ends up handcuffed to a urinal in a bad part of San Francisco.

Oh, sorry, I got carried away. None of the lessons in Chapter 13 turn out like that. It's all that stuff you try to instill in your pre-school kids, but it's adapted to the level of very boring sorts of teenagers.

The crap I pulled as a teenager, and the crap that spills out of my own teenagers is nothing like this:

3. Your sister wanted to wear her new blouse this afternoon, but it wasn’t in the closet. You had borrowed it without asking. It’s now later that evening.

I often don't hear about problems like that until someone is bleeding, and the fact is they do know better than that, and they have since they were little kids I could pick up off the floor.

If I made them sit down and do lessons like this they'd be pissed. If a teacher tried to make them do something like this, they'd be pissed, and probably respond with some sort of dripping sarcasm which would get me a call from the school.

My sister got mad because I borrowed her blouse? Well here's how I'll fix it: I'll cut her up into little pieces and feed her to our neighbor's nasty dog. There won't be a "next time."

(Oh my, speak of the devil, my youngest just claimed a shotgun would be quicker...)

My kids would stand together against the world, but they are wildly impatient. Their ethical training is most often tossed to them like raw meat. and they devour it quickly.

"You know your aunt once told grandma she was visiting her cousin, but they drove from Los Angeles to Canada instead, and if you ever do anything like that you won't drive again until you are at least 36."

I think they get it.