Couple Return From KFC To Find Naked, Drunk Woman In Yard

[matcom]

<snip>

MOON LAKE - Cecil and Denise Allred's Sunday night began without incident. They ate dinner at KFC. They returned home to Randee Road. He stepped outside to feed chicken scraps to the cats.

Then he saw the body.

There in the mud a few feet from the house, someone lay in a fetal position. Pants and underwear were pulled down to the ankles. The county had seen six murders in the previous five weeks, and Cecil Allred feared the worst.

"Don't go out there," he told his wife. "Call the sheriff."

When Allred, a 51-year-old retired mason, went back outside for further investigation, the body tried to stand up.

Not dead, he concluded.

A live woman.

Partly undressed.

Fully intoxicated.

"I wasn't about to touch the lady," he would say later. "I guess she was going to the restroom, I don't know."

As best he can remember, their conversation went like this:

She: "I live here."

He: "No you don't. You need to get up and leave."

http://www.sptimes.com/2006/08/10/Hernando/Uninvited_guest__sans.shtml

[ceile]

1. LOL

The Land O'Lakes jail? Like the margarine?
:rofl:

[Zomby Woof]

2. Thay live on RANDEE Road

Of course, if KFC used CORN FLAKES to make their fried chicken, NONE of this would have happened. x(

[lost-in-nj]

3. or

if they ate at
Cracker Barrel :)




lost

[Zomby Woof]

6. That goes without saying!

:D

[CrushTheDLC]

4. On my way to KFC now.....

If I'm gonna find a naked drunk woman in my yard when I get back, why the Hell not? :evilgrin:

[matcom]

5. extra crispy for me!

:bounce:

[Momgonepostal]

7. Totally funny this took place in "Moon" Lake

Maybe she was from the town welcome wagon?

[skygazer]

8. They have a restroom in their yard?

I always have to giggle when people refer to it as "using the bathroom" or "restroom" when it's outside. That's one big restroom. :rofl:

[Haole Girl]

9. That is just KFW

Kentucky Fried Weird

[Midlodemocrat]

10. IT WASN'T ME!!!! I didn't go to KFC last night.

The other part could be true however.

[Zomby Woof]

11. Yesterday was Wednesday

So we all know you were eating Chicken Pot Pie at CRACKER BARREL. :hide:

[Midlodemocrat]

12. Psst. ZW, over here.

I did go to CB for chicken pot pie because it is frigging delicious, but they were all out. So, I had a salad.

Then we went and got a new puppy.

[mikeytherat]

13. And where are the puppy pix?

I mean, I lost out on the air hockey table, so throw me a friggin' bone here!

;-)

mikey_the_rat

[Midlodemocrat]

16. I'm going to post them tomorrow. My digital camera is recharging.

She is absolutely adorable. I think she weighs all of four pounds. The brightest blue eyes. Just adorable.

Even at 4AM this morning when she was crying in her crate after I had been holding her while she slept. I couldn't stand to hear her cry.

[Zomby Woof]

14. Woohoo!

Congrats on the new addition to your family! :D Post some pics when you can!

[HarukaTheTrophyWife]

15. Awwww...what kind of puppy and where are the pics?

Inquiring minds want to know.

[Midlodemocrat]

17. Yorkie/Shih Tsu mix.

I'm going to post them tomorrow when my camera is recharged. She is truly adorable, though.

[SammyWinstonJack]

20. Aww!

:-)

[Bossy Monkey]

18. This might be a better advertising strategy for KFC than

inexplicably using the music from Sweet Home Alabama. Just a guess though.:P

[C_eh_N_eh_D_eh]

19. This woman could have been a date-rape victim

dumped out of a van in someone's front yard. That's the first impression I got when I read this.

Did anyone think to get her to a doctor?

[LSK]

21. this doesnt happen to Olive Garden diners

:hide: