Uncle Randy Koolzip says "Hey!" (A pic thread, maybe?)

[RandomKoolzip]

"Enjoy my cramped, squalid bedroom! See the laughably primitive computer I use? I'm still payin' for it!

See the bed on the left? It's all dishevelled because my cat shat it in last night.

See the cat carrier on the chair? That's what I'm gonna use to transport that cat to the shelter!

Excelsior!"



"You BET I'm naked in this pic! I'm always nude like a jaybird when I pray to Jesus! (Okay, not technically naked. You can't see the assless chaps I'm wearing.)"



"See the odd camera angle I'm using in this pic? I held the camera in this awkward way because I'm fat and this is the only vantage point at which I don't look like a big ol' tubby man-booby blimp. Plus, If I crowd the frame with my enormous, bulbous head and unkempt hair, you won't see the seven-foot high stockpile of Cheetos behind me. Or the Ryan Cabrerra posters."

:patriot: :popcorn: :poopcorn:

[arwalden]

1. Clever Angles And Camera Tricks...

... you're pretty sneaky Uncle Randy!

:popcorn: :popcorn: :popcorn: :popcorn:

[RandomKoolzip]

2. I'm actually a 400-pound Black midget.

It's amazing what camera trickery can accomplish!

Oh, and I'm also a woman.

[arwalden]

48. I'm Telling Ya... It Takes YEARS Off Your Face...

... better than BOTOX (and cheaper too!)

[asthmaticeog]

3. You exploit the "chubby girl on MySpace" camera angle brilliantly.

:patriot:

POST MORE NAKEDS! 'CUZ I'M SPANKIN' IT! :freak:

[RandomKoolzip]

5. More nakeds? You got it, sporto!

This is the "Chubby DUDE on MySpace Camera Angle."

It doubles as a shocking expose on the condition of my labial-nasal trough.

(Note to Hedges if he shows up: 86 Soul Patch.)

[asthmaticeog]

9. UNNNNNNNGGGGH. OK, done. Thanks!

Now where'd I leave my Doctor Weird...?

[Call Me Wesley]

46. Uhmmmm, here's a book for you:

[asthmaticeog]

53. !

:rofl:

:thumbsup::thumbsup::thumbsup:

[RandomKoolzip]

54. Oh, I've read that one.

It gets bogged down in the septum - uh, I mean, "middle."

It's rare that I read a book that doesn't feature Fabio on the cover, so consider yourself lucky that I know what you're talkin about.

[Magrittes Pipe]

67. Welcome to the 21st century!

:party:

[GirlinContempt]

4. Shut up, gorgeous.

:9

[RandomKoolzip]

7. If Christopher Lloyd and Zero Mostel had a love child....

...it'd be me. Throw in some Penn Jillette to taste, and Vee-ola!

In other words, Sexier Than Fuck Itself.

[GirlinContempt]

10. "Sexier Than Fuck Itself."

I'm in complete agreement. Now, ditch the horribly crushing self esteem issues, and maybe the blue shirt.

[RandomKoolzip]

12. Um....it's purple. Duh!

And I'll use ANY excuse to take it off!

[ChavezSpeakstheTruth]

13. Do it BITCH!

[RandomKoolzip]

19. Oh, you!

Just for you, my precious bottom:

http://www.freewebs.com/momoexposed!/happy.jpg

[ChavezSpeakstheTruth]

23. They have no goulash in Orlando

kid

[RandomKoolzip]

36. And after you gaze at my snaps you'll be convinced

that there is no balm in Gilead, either.

[ChavezSpeakstheTruth]

44. I fixin' to balm your tiger

very soon!

[GirlinContempt]

22. Strip!

And, it looks blue to me.

[RandomKoolzip]

24. Just for you, my sweet:

[ChavezSpeakstheTruth]

26. !

[GirlinContempt]

28. Oh lordy, you do know the way to a girls libido.

[tigereye]

20. you are way saner than Penn

[tigereye]

6. um

I think you need to get out more, Uncle Koolzip! ;)

[RandomKoolzip]

8. I do need to get out more...AND BUY MORE CAMERAS!

If you're lucky, I'll post a pic of my midsection! Maybe I'll post thirty of 'em! Forty even!

[ChavezSpeakstheTruth]

11. I have a friend I would like to introduce you to

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=07W7-4Meffo

[RandomKoolzip]

15. I, Hard Gay, fixed a child's tastes.

If that's not etched into my gravestone, my life will have been in vain.

[ChavezSpeakstheTruth]

16. HOOOOOOO!!!!

[asthmaticeog]

27. TOTAL SUCCESS!

[ChavezSpeakstheTruth]

33. Nice height!

[asthmaticeog]

37. HeightX0r is teh R0x0r!

[ChavezSpeakstheTruth]

39. What? I don't know what the fuck you're talking aboutz0r

or whatever

[RandomKoolzip]

41. I'll make you like Natto!

[ChavezSpeakstheTruth]

43. You're about to find out that I eat natto every day for breakfast

And I'mm gonna pump your ass full of truth!

[dolo amber]

14. Settle down, priyanka

:yoiks:

[ChavezSpeakstheTruth]

17. part deux

[RandomKoolzip]

21. "You say you like to gamble/I tell you I'm your man....

You win some you lose some/It's all the same to me...

The ACE OF SPADES! the ACE of SPAAADESSSS!!!!"

[ChavezSpeakstheTruth]

25. Zabba dooba ding zooba ding ding rain

stickin needles in your dick 'cause you can't FIND a vein!

[RandomKoolzip]

30. Yo Brian, you ain't no pimp dude.

[ChavezSpeakstheTruth]

32. You better bring it!

[RandomKoolzip]

40. Nice catch, blanco nino.

Too bad your ass got saaaaaaaaacked:

[ChavezSpeakstheTruth]

42. That's right - I already had 'im!

[RandomKoolzip]

47. That's right, Billy: I'm BAAACK and I want YOUUUU.

(ignore the dumb caption)

[ChavezSpeakstheTruth]

49. My God - it's like I'm looking into a mirror

[XNASA]

18. Next time.......

A little bit of nipple would be nice.

[ChavezSpeakstheTruth]

29. that's what she said

[La Lioness Priyanka]

31. pic

[RandomKoolzip]

35. Oy!

UNironically sexy! How refreshing!

[progmom]

75. gorgeous!

[swimboy]

34. Awesome post

awesome thread.

[RandomKoolzip]

38. And awesome nude shoulders!

I worked HARD for this body, and dammit I'm gonna show it off.

[swimboy]

45. w0rd

[dolo amber]

50. Fitty

[ChavezSpeakstheTruth]

51. Bit¢h please!

He hasn't even been shot once!

[RandomKoolzip]

52. You know I got the Magic Stick, though.

dolo's right, wanksta.

[jpgray]

55. ...

:rofl:

Looking good man! Just remember the familiar and yet alarming brother we discover in our own photographs is also the absurd. Are you going to school this Fall, or did I misremember that?

[RandomKoolzip]

57. I start school on the 29th.

My first class? "History of Christianity."

[GirlinContempt]

56. Kick for truth and beauty

[xchrom]

58. and hilarity and hottie boys.

[GirlinContempt]

59. There is something very hot about him

[xchrom]

60. oooh! yummy! and an iron fist to boot!

does it get any better?

[GirlinContempt]

61. Only if Zippy dons the red star

and lays down

[xchrom]

62. oh i think he'd do that for you --

or a cookie.

[GirlinContempt]

63. I meant for the proletariat

:D

[sundog]

64. you so sexy rkz

:D

[ChavezSpeakstheTruth]

65. teh sex0r

[SOteric]

66. m'kay.

[ForrestGump]

68. You know, you really should stop posting pictures of

supermodels and claiming that they're you.





You should show yourself as you really are, honestly, as I do:

[SOteric]

69. *koff*

[ForrestGump]

70. Don't MAKE me cough, woman. Not when I'm wearing my yak Speedos

Hey! That's me!

Just the other week... :P

[GOPisEvil]

72. !!

Thanks for classing this thread up. :hubba:

[blondeatlast]

71. Unfortunate specs, but the background (Prague) is fab-OU-lus:

[GirlinContempt]

73. clown car

[progmom]

74. hot damn you're good looking

:patriot: